A Funeral

The sky is gray. There was no real sunrise. Not that we could tell if there was one. There is a large hayshed that blocks our view of the mountains. It is made of recycled tin. That knowledge makes me feel so much better.  The gray just got lighter and then it was morning. I didn't want to get out of bed. I laid there and looked at the gray clouds through the venetian blinds. Finally, my back hurt bad enough I just got up.
I thought I'd wait for the daughter to get out of bed as wife has gone to the Dr. for a checkup. Daughter has not been feeling well so I thought I'd see how she was before wandering out of the house.
Last night she had trouble sleeping again. At 10 p.m. she got out of bed and came to me in tears. She wanted to know how to get a thought out of her head.
She had been thinking about genies and what would happen if she found one. The problem was that she said she didn't really want anything to be different and she was trying to get rid of the genie. She pointed at him and said she wanted him to go away but the genie deflected her wish onto the fellow standing behind him and he disappeared.
So...
I suggested that instead of trying to ignore the story-which was not working, she should change the story line so that instead of fighting with her mind and not sleeping, she would develop a story arc that would be interesting and put her to sleep.
We had a discussion about the rules genie's live by and how the story could be changed. I also pointed out that in my understanding of Christian theology accepting One True God trumps the Genie and so even if she found the Genie the whole wish thing might not work anyway. This is sort of why I don't play the lottery. I fear God would punish me for gambling by having me win enough to get my name in the papers, but not enough so that I wouldn't care. Or...since it is wrong to gamble, I would never win, I'd just loose all my money as punishment. Or, since I'm predestined to win or lose and I don't have the money yet, that means I've already lost and I shouldn't bother playing...
But, I digress. (I think one of those arguments is invalid anyway)
Then I went we said a prayer and I got in bed with her and lay there for a while till her breathing evened out and she appeared to be sleeping. She was not actually sleeping but said it was ok to leave and thanked me for helping her. I sometimes worry that my amateur psychology will in some way damage her psyche and she will have to spend a lot of money to get re-programed later in life. Which will fail as she will be too cynical to actually believe the psychologist.
But, that was not what this blog post is about...
This afternoon I have a funeral to attend. The fellow has not been in good shape for years. He could not really talk as a result of a stroke. He attended our church so I am taking my dad.
Funerals give me severe tension. Not because the people are dead. It is because of all the other people reminding me of what I am not.  That is a long story.
In other news....
I wish my father would not have lost the Chevron Bill. He has filed it somewhere but he does not know where. He puts all the bills into something in Filemaker Pro 2.0 but doesn't always spell things consistently so there is no way to find it again. I suspect the bill has been put into last years or last month's bill file. He is working hard on it right now and I hate to disturb him.