This Blog does not in any Fathomable way reflect any of the current opinions or beliefs of the institution I used to work for. In fact my former employer has completely disavowed any link or reference to them in this blog.
I am out of coffee and I don't really feel like moving from my chair.
My daughter is here to help me but she is fighting off something she apparently picked up visiting me in the hospital and is sleeping in. My wife is at work.
I have been trying to come up with a good solid future plan.
I think I need to get my certification for Sports Turf Management and pursue the offer with my local country club.
I suppose I should work at a country club
I seem to have some really good contacts in the Regenerative Agriculture world, I have no capital to spend and I suspect my efforts will be for naught.
I keep hearing from people from my old job. The low level bitterness that is/was the undercurrent of Uni job is amazing. Several people feel I was made an example of. Although no one understands what I could have possibly done to get fired but not banned from campus or escorted out by security. I am surprised that everyone was not given a sticker and a piece of candy and told they were special after my departure but I guess they just went for the bury it and it will go away program. It doesn't really matter. The texts will taper off in the next couple weeks and it is just as well.
HR has not actually taken the steps required to continue my benefits through the COBRA program. I have not called them. They don't want to work any harder than they have to. They probably don't actually know how to do it. The past is any indication of the future, everyone with experience has quit and the office is understaffed with new people who have no idea what is going on.
I shall continue making lists of ideas and soldier on.
I have been encouraged to "write." I have no idea what to write about. Apparently this blog is not particularly interesting to anyone other than grumpy farmers. This is a diminishing group!
The randomness of life amazes me. One moment you are going insane and stuck in a demoralizing job and then, in the course of a couple weeks, you have no job, you are confined to a house and crutches, and the world is suddenly full of options.
If I were ten years younger I would have a job by now because there are so many opportunities, However, I am not sure I want to be a groundskeeper, sprayer operator, or dump truck driver.
I should have done this years ago!
I have been thinking capitalizing on the Regenerative Agriculture movement.
The idea of farming with less chemical inputs has always appealed to me. The problem I have with the whole thing is that there was no magic to pre 1930's agriculture. It was hard work and it was hand labor. The regen people seem to think there is a secret magic formula that will make all of nature work in harmony.
I see Mother Nature as a cycle of boom vs bust and catastrophic change where the survival of the planet is based on the average. But that average is attained by sometimes wild extremes.
This is influenced by my Euro-centric Colonialist world view and Indigenous peoples always have the "Undeniable Virtue of the Oppressed," on their side. Thus they are always in harmony with "Nature."
Every poop is sacred if it is done by an Aboriginal but if it is contributed by a White Colonialist it is pollution.
But I digress.
I am thinking of taking parts of this course from www.soilfoodweb.com. I have met Dr. Elaine and listened to her motivational speech and she appears to have qualifications. However, I have met many people who attempted to sell Amway memberships and I am very skeptical and it costs $2600
Other options are to get serious about farming or to buy a smaller no-till drill and work for the Soil Conservation Service, or work part-time for a local golf course and farm at home. I will probably do the part-time job.
In pain and suffering news...
Today I walked twenty feet without crutches. (don't tell my wife) Today was also the day to remove the dressing and uncover my stitches.
The surgery was really pretty cool. They did have to slice me open to get the right angle for the DeWalt drill but is healing amazingly well and for some reason the stitches don't hurt. The incision is also held together with Steri-Strips which pull the sides of the incision together.
The concept for Steri-Strips was invented by my good friend Mel who actually patented the design. After thousands of dollars and a number of years he gave up. Shortly thereafter 3M came with Steri-Strips and now I am benefiting. Thanks Mel.
I have to post this picture.
After years of putting up with my weird uptightness about stacking wood my wife had to stack wood by herself. I am immensely proud of her. It is pretty darn straight and stable.
My good friend who does not want to be mentioned in my blog is interested in aliens. This is a common interest we share. Interesting things which bring people from dissimilar backgrounds together.
Some years ago I wrote about meeting a fellow who served in the US Air Force during the Cold War. His job was to be a low level liaison with space aliens. The Aliens were pretty interested in the Super Powers after the invention of the Atomic Bomb. Apparently there were a lot of meetings between the US Gubment and Space Aliens.
I spoke with the man on the phone. He lived in Montana. I found him because had a number of Hercules LDT 465 Multifuel engines which fit into White 2-135/155 tractors. He was using these surplus engines for powering his sawmill, trucks, and generating electricity. He had come up with a scheme to get the local power company to give him their old transformer oil for recycling. There was a lot of it as some transformers contained oil contaminated with Dioxin and others did not. But no one knew which one was which. So they changed them all. Free oil for life.
This was during the time of the first severe forest fires in Montana and the modern forest service scheme of not putting out the fire but attempting to keep it burning so the fire crews and fire boss could gain status and money. Locals were not really happy about being burned out of their homes but they just didn't understand global warming and what was good for them.
But, I digress...
I had never met anyone who had met an alien and I was very excited. I know somewhere I have notes. My favorite part of the conversation is hearing his wife in the background trying to get him to shut up.
I know I wrote this down!
Have any of you long timers seen this discussion?
I cannot find my posts on converting the LDT 465 into a tractor engine. I cannot find the discussion of buying the engines which was actually interesting because I found three at a local salvage yard and they fellow who had them was super fascinating.
There are no posts on buying a 1973 Ford LN 8000 which looked rough but was in really good mechanical shape and was my first experience with a 13 speed. This is the truck I bought to haul the engines home.
I swear there are missing posts, perhaps the whole year of LN7000's and Hercules diesels mentioned in the blog.
Here is a link to my search for posts containing the word "Aliens"
I also started searching for references to my old job. I see that I thought I was contributing but actually was just annoying the head of my department. There are very few references that show up by searching terms. I was found because I did not disable track-backs in my links.
It is interesting to look back on what I was doing a couple years ago. This post from 2022 has some interesting reminders from past life.
Here is a post from 2022 which I was supposed to remove as part of my agreement to not get fired after the blog was discovered. I was accused of "gaslighting," the people I work with, and also being racist. I also riled middle and slightly upper management. I don't see the post were I put my objections in a letter to send to the head of the COVID committee and it went to all the people on the COVID committee. I had people coming up to me and saying that they agreed with me but no one would listen to them for weeks.
My former employer (CLICK HERE) should change their slogan from "Uncommonly Driven," to "Confirmation Bias is Builds Confidence." Just read the whole Month of February 2022... (CLICK HERE)
The one risk I never associated with taking Oxycodone was consuming grapefruit. Apparently, it greatly enhances the effects of the drug and can lead to respitory failure and death. I read that on the bottle. The one side effect of Oxy that I find most disturbing is the inability to poop and they pain that comes with those infrequent supposed releifs. I was honesty hoping I could solve the question by just accepting blindness. (per the old saying)
However, as they say, "this two shall pass," and it did.
I have done a number of stupid and risky things in my life without injury. My entire feed making misadventure is a high risk operation that borders on on suicidal. I ran an open flatbelt hammer mill, I mix my feed in a surplus fertilizer bin and lift it over the intake of the mixer/grinder, then I crawl on top of the mixer grinder to open the bin. Sometimes I climb a rickty ladder on the side of the bin to unplug it. I'm 20 feet in the air and I am fine.
But when I walk from the house to the barn in the freezing rain and I slip and break my hip.
To clarify, I fractured the upper end of my femor where it transitions into the ball.
My surgeon was not the most optimistic fellow in the world, although he seemed to be quite competent.
He informed me that most often in an accident like this, the hip would also be damaged. This is an accident most associated with older people and is considered quite serious.
My fracture had not seperated. My hip was not damaged. With the insertion of three wicked looking screws and sitting still for three weeks I should be fine.
I have been home almost a week and I am actually getting much better. I am waiting on a trip to Orthropedics to be examined and get an x-ray and then I will be given instructions for therapy and restrictions on walking and driving and leaving the house will be revisited.
The current estimation for recovery is up to six months. Apparently the break is hard to see and so difficult to determine it the bone is mending togather. It it doesn't mend then I will be putting all my weight on the pins which will break and I will need a new hip.
It doesn't really hurt a lot. I do have muscle pain from my hip to my knee and my knee also hurts.
The doctors said I would see a lot of bruising but I have virtually none. I also can't see the point where I hit the ground. I suspect I twisted my hip somehow but I guess it doesn't really matter how, it is done.
Sitting around is tough. I have made lists of things to do. I need to work on my year end books but can't really set upright in a chair. I have a couple actual books to read. I started "To A God Unknown," by John Stienbeck but a farmer friend came to visit me today so I didn't read much.
My friend's wife baked me cookies which were quite good.
I also got a load of firewood today. Keeping the fire going in a chore as it is hard to bend over and lift wood. My wife has been keeping the wood box full but we didn't store up as much wood this year. She ordered a mixed load of ash and oak from a young guy that is cutting wood. He dumped it in the driveway and my friend stacked up a pile before we got rained out. I supervised and tried to help but it is awkward with crutches. We were able to get a tarp on the pile so I have all day tomorrow. Actually I suspect my wife will not allow me to stack wood, even if I can figure out a way to move it.
I have had visitors and my brother comes in to help keep the fire going. It certianly reminds you of your mortality when you go from wishing you could be lazy to being forced to sit in a chair all day.
Unfortuantly I now have nothing interesting to write about in my blog.
It was suggested that my views on certian subjects might not actually be welcomed by a broader audience so I shall refrain.
One probably should not lie to the doctors just to get out of the hospital. I think I am going to get away with it however. Today I walked four steps without crutches. I am not supposed to so please don't report me to HR.
I am home from the Hospital!
I have it all! My wife left me with coffee, books, and a lego kit if I achieve my daily goals. My brother brought me Farm Show and got the fire going. I am truly, "too blessed to be stressed!"
I can't remember much of my hospital stay. I was reading my hospital notes yesterday and realized I was heavily drugged. Oxy, Morphine, and a certain anti-anxiety medication, are a great combination for me and very entertaining to my neighbors.
The warning label on the Oxycodone says it could cause drowsiness. However, it makes me silly and wired and constipated. The Morphine helps me sleep and I suspect the Lexapro smoothed out the spikes so I just stayed stoned all the time.
I made a lot of new friends with this combination. If only I could remember them.
As I was saying yesterday, I had a spinal 30 years ago when I ran my foot through the cross conveyer chain on the 1075 New Holland stacker. That is my benchmark for pain and suffering.
The spinal was horrible. It hurt like heck, it made half my body felt numb but I could still have the bone sensations when they worked on my foot. Then, as it wore off, the top of my body had feeling and the bottom didn't. I felt like I was wetting the bed constantly and I had to pee.
My surgeon wanted me to do the spinal but the staff in the operating room actually agreed with my fears and just knocked me out.
I woke up an hour and a half later in recovery and immediately found myself engaged in conversation with my nurse who had just gone through a divorce and had a disappointing date the previous night. She also had a similar job experience where the people she worked with were cool and the management were a bunch of idiot liberals who had no idea of what it was like to be working class. Also, she said, "That spinal hurts like hell, you know they stab you in the spine with a needle!"
I think I talked too much. My wife said when the nurse called her to tell her I was awake she congratulated her on 25 years of marriage and having an "adorable," husband. There is probably video of this somewhere online. I can laugh because it is good to be a happy junkie vs a sad depressed one.
They gave me a room with an older man from Romania. He had also broken his hip. Mine was on the left and his was on the right. We also had the same surgeon.
Later my wife and daughter showed up with more dim sum, and reading material, I think... Now the timeline becomes rather fuzzy. All I remember is having to pee frequently and how awkward that was. I met numerous nurses who were all really nice and kept asking me if I needed more pain medication. I kept saying it didn't hurt unless I moved and I was not supposed to move anyway.
So they brought me a cup of pills which I took. But, no morphine in the IV. This was bad as when the previous dose of morphine wore off I was wide awake and uncomfortable. There was no position that felt right and every time I got to sleep some sort of monitor would go off or I had to pee which required a nurse who had to measure my output and then they would do an ultrasound of my bladder to see if it was all out.
My roommate seemed to be having similar problems with pain and sleep so we started talking. He came to the USA in 1987 from Romania. This was still a dictatorship in 1987 and despite the many reforms going on in the world, they were still pretty hard line communist.
As a Christian, he and his family faced discrimination from the state government. I couldn't hear everything he said but his efforts to worship God resulted in lower status jobs and threat of imprisonment.
He said at one point got tired of always defending his belief so he asked the state to prove there was anything wrong with him as a citizen. This got him arrested again and his family harassed, but they found that he had broken no laws and was actually a good citizen.
Many people were trying to escape the country at this time. He said the risks were high as they would simply shoot you or disappear you into hard labor if you were caught. So, he decided to immigrate legally and take his family. This was a lengthy and expensive process as he had two boys and two girls and his wife,
His brother-in-law and some friends tried to escape at night across water. I should look this up to figure out exactly where this could be done. It sounded like to me like they built large floaty and towed it behind a boat. Or possibly were going to float down a river past the border with no power.
Either way, something spooked the crossing guards and they caught them with a spotlight. They were hauled out of the river and interrogated. His brother-in-law was arrested but then, "disappeared."
My friend said he went with his Sister to the barracks near where the incident took place. The first soldier said he remembered the incident and the brother was in custody and he would go and check to see what they could do.
He was gone a long time and another officer came back to say that there was no report of the incident, no one remembered the incident, and no one by that name was in custody, His brother-in-law disappeared just like that..
Eventually my new friend was able to legally immigrate to the USA. He said he wrote lots of letters and filled out a lot of forms and even tried calling people in US Congress and though constant efforts he was approved for immigration.
He was trained as a plumber in Romania so he had job skills. I wish I could remember how he said this but some how he ended up on the West Coast. California had too many mosquitoes, Washington was too cold and rainy, and Oregon was great.
He got a job working in maintenance at Reed College so his four children could use the Tuition Exchange to get free college at less expensive colleges. (I laughed at that, it sounded pretty familiar) After ten years he retired and started his own business.
My friend is very involved in the Romanian community locally. I believe he is a pastor in a Romanian Assembly of God Church.
He said to me, "You know things are different today. When I came here this was a Christian country. There were Bibles on the airplane (that brought him and his family to the USA) There were people in the Churches. It is different now."
He went on to say that Christians in the US don’t believe in the power of prayer. "When you have everything you want, it is hard to understand that Jesus said “take up my cross, (as we say in Romania it is his burden,) and follow Me.)" I put quotes around this because while I paraphrased it a little he was trying to get across the idea that there is responsibility involved with being a Christian. This carries outward from family and community onward. But I have to say it like he said it. It was the power of prayer and the power of God that got his wife, himself and four children out of Romania legally and he went back to that statement a number of times.
The rest of the conversation is pretty fuzzy. I wrote this first part down but we talked for a very long time.
I am pretty sure the next day was Sunday. I woke early as I pinched my IV and the monitor went off and then my kidneys were exploding. They kept me pumped full of IV fluids. So I had to call the nurse and I had to do the arduous task of swinging my legs over the bed to use the urinal. But, I was shocked to find I could do it without help.
I ordered breakfast.
Breakfast was good. I had two eggs over easy, toast, and bacon. The bacon was good. Not too crispy and not limp. Plus, I swear it was real pork and not a turkey substitute.
No raisin toast but the bacon was good.
I had a consultation with my nurse and discovered I was scheduled to walk with crutches or a walker that very day. I asked if I could walk, could I go home? My nurse said I couldn't go home till I pooped. And gave me more pain meds. I protested but she sternly suggested walking would hurt today. She also threatened me with laxatives.
She was a nice but stern Asian nurse. She had a lot of questions for me. Could I feel my feet? Could I show her how I got turned to get out of bed without her help. (which I had been doing already).
"I will be right back," she said and bustled out of the room. She returned with pants. This was the best thing that had happened to me since I arrived at the hospital.
Sometime after my wife and daughter showed up with coffee and a raisin muffin and a robe. They had spent the night at the hotel across the road. The also brought me a lego kit to assemble when I completed my walk.
Things are fuzzy for a while as I got more morphine in my drip in preparation for the walk.
Sometime thereafter a nice physical therapist lady showed up with a lot of the same questions and a walker. Could I feel my feet? How did I get out of bed? I showed her how I used my good leg to help my bad leg. Then, could I stand on my own. So I stood up. She rushed to grab me. I said I was fine.
I was able to walk with crutches and a walker and I negotiated stairs. She was very happy I had pants and a robe.
I was then cleared to pee on my own. This was almost as nice as getting pants.
Sometime thereafter my Wife and Daughter showed up with more Dim Sum and my hospital lunch arrived which was mostly salad. I assembled my lego steam roller and we discussed the odds of me going home.
It had been made pretty clear that I would have therapy and observation after surgery and the possibility of going home on Sunday was close to zero. We decided that the only way to improve chances of my discharge would be for my wife to get an hour away and then have to come back. If this didn't work it was ok as she needed to get the house warmed up and set some things in order. We had lots of help at home with her sister and my sister-in-law, brother, and nephews, but the pets were not happy and the house was cold.
Shortly after she left my nurse returned. She wanted me to take more laxatives and pain meds. I told her that has much as I appreciate her care and attention, I just really wanted to go home. Was there any way? She said, "ok, you try go number two! I talk to orthopedics"
Soon, a nice young man from Orthopedics showed up. He did all the same tests and asked the same questions. I stood for him. Showed him I could walk with crutches. I said how I would negotiate stairs. (down with the pain- bad leg first to go down) He asked about my house. Did I have people close by to help. What was my pain level? (Zero as I was still high as row one at a Dread Zeppelin concert.
I was given, and I passed, all their physical tests (which were designed for 90 year-olds) but I winced a little just to show I was trying. The only thing left was for me to drop a Joe so they knew things were working.
I even did a dry run sitting on the WC to show that I could in fact perform as requested.
The young fellow seemed very impressed and I suggested sending me how to make room for all the poor suffering folk still in the corridors of the ER. He said he would try calling my surgeon. (Who I knew was in surgery and unavailable, as my neighbor had been trying to pin down his time for surgery all morning.)
After he left the nice Asian nurse came in with a bag of super laxative that she could mix us and give me and then I could poop as required. "Maybe too much," she said. "Your choice!"
So I smiled my best smile (think Jim Belushi when Carrie Fisher was going to shoot him in Blues Brothers) and I promised the nice Asian nurse I would poop as soon as I got home. "Ok, Maybe, I call," she said and bustled out of the room.
Ten minutes later she reappears with a sheaf of papers and a lot of instructions. She had ordered my medications, she didn't actually get a good answer from Orthopedics but she thought I was really doing well and I would promise to poop as soon as I was home, I could go. "Did I have gas," she said. "I do!" I truthfully replied, (the duck and I are true friends and he clung tight with me through out my hospital stay, frequently quacking in the back ground.)
I called my wife who was looking for crutches at GoodWill. They are setting me free, get back here! I said.
My medicine arrived. I got my final instructions. My nurse showed up with a discharge notice and a wheel chair. I ask if I needed to check out or pay a bill or do something. My nurse says, "no, I wheel you out. We don't stop at desk. Your wife meet us in front. I tell her what to do!"
My wife shows up. My nurse gives my wife very detailed instructions on how to pick me up and tells her to get going! (This was funny because my wife didn't pick up what I just realized and that I was actually escaping and this was to be a well coordinated jail break.)
All was well, I was dressed and on my way out the door. Then my surgeon arrives to talk to my neighbor,
The Doctor says, “where are you goin?”I look at my nurse.
She looks worried.
I said, “you cured me! I am going home. Thank you so much!” He stares at me… “Are you putting full weight on that leg?!”
I feel I am in trouble.
I say I am favoring it when it hurts but mostly yes. He looks quizzical. I hold my crutches to the side and stand. “Does that hurt? Are you putting full weight on your leg?” He asks again. “Should I not be?” I asked.
Apparently, hip replacements take longer than one day to recover from.
"Have you even seen your x-rays?" he asked.
"Just a quick look," I say. Hoping to hedge my prevarication and looking for a chance to say the magic words he needed to hear that would convince him to set me free.
The Surgeon shook his head and pulled up my x-Rays on his computer screen. It was a horrific sight. I swear they used some sort of self tapping rather long and brutal sheet metal screws to hold my leg and hip ball together. Three of them, I will be setting off metal detectors till I die. Probably used a power DeWalt to zip them in, it was a short surgery.
He gave me a stern lecture. I am not to get in and out of tractors or use a clutch for four to six months. I am not to leave my house for eight weeks. I must walk three times a day, but not overdo it. I am not to lift things, I am not to climb stairs any more than necessary. I am not to drive. It was a long lecture.
"Well, I could just go back to bed," I said.
He just shook his head and let me go. He knew I was full of B.S.
I asked my nurse on the way out if I got her in trouble. She swore she was not in trouble. She said I was just in, "very good shape and a strong man." She said, “I know it hurt more than you say. You do good job. I know you take care!” “I promise to poop,” I said.
I wanted to hug her, but I was not that high any more and I am normally a shy and reclusive person.
And I am home!
It is wonderful!
(If I could turn on the charm with people like this all the time, I would probably have a little more financial success. )
In my chair, wearing the stocking hat my daughter knitted me for Christmas. Life is so much better than it was last week!
You think you are invincible and then suddenly you find out you are not.
I took this picture when I first arrived in the ER. I still have my clothes. The clock says 9 pm.
There are certainties in life. If you put new tires on your tractor something will go wrong. If you paint your tractor you will have to pull the engine. Apparently, if you finally buy a new pickup, the first new vehicle in your life, you will suffer life changes...
Loyal readers will note that I parked the lovely and gracious Mrs. Shepherd's new pickup in the barn Tuesday night so it wouldn’t have ice on windshield when it was time to go her job, that is high paying and more satisfying than the one I had for eight years.
At 6 am Wednesday I walked out to barn to warm her truck and move it to the driveway. I knew there was freezing rain but I am from Oregon, I laugh (cautiously) at freezing rain.
I made it halfway when I hit wet ice.
Down I went.
So I was stuck halfway to the barn and I could only think of two things. First, “I’ve fallen and i can’t get up,” secondly, the lady I used to work with is going to say (in her old lady voice) you broke your hiiiiiip….
I did not think that i broke my hip. It was my knee that hurt. The opposite knee that I messed up last week.
So I found a scoop shovel and used it as a crutch to get to gate and Mrs. helped me the rest of the way. She laid down bath towels so we walked on them to house. It was that slick on the snow.
Wednesday I sat in my chair with heat and ice. My wife worried about me all day and made an appointment at Kaiser Salem for Thursday morning. (The Salem office is about 45 minutes from my home.)
Thursday morning I swung my legs out of bed with very little pain. I was using a mop handle for a crutch as the weather was too nasty to slog out to the barn for a real crutch. I had my coffee and went to the bathroom. It was a little painful. Certain logistical movements had to be though out first but I did fine. I put on sweat pants and socks by myself.
I was convinced that there was no possible way that I had broken anything. I could even put weight on my leg. Only old folks break a hip.
We got to Salem. I am walking ok with a real crutch. We get an x-ray and discuss it with my Dr. who says I can go home. The x-ray lady seemed skeptical. I was also having a lot more problems getting around. I had pain from my groin to my knee. But, my knee no longer felt twisted and yet I still couldn't walk.
I was happy to be home. I got back up the steps with some difficulty and into my chair with relief, I was sore. My wife got me some pills. I felt better.
My wife was just leaving for work when the Doctor called me. He thinks I am ok but just in case, I need a CT scan. There just might be a little crack. He says he has put in a rush for the CT so I will need to wait for the lab to call me.
The lab calls right away. I need to be back in Salem in two and a half hours. I try to stall till four pm because I hurt and my wife needs to at least cover for her boss so that the boss can get lunch. The lady asks me if I am declining my scan. Because the next appointment is at a different lab that is further away.
Finally I just say I will be there at 2:45 pm and figure I will arrive when I arrive. Wife goes to work so Boss can have lunch. I go to sleep.
In the rush to get out the door and to the CT scan department on time, my cell phone gets dropped. (on the back porch actually)
We arrive in time for the scan. It goes really fast and we leave. My wife wants to get a few groceries on the way home. I was setting in the pickup and I started to worry.
When she returned I looked up the Kaiser Permanente app on her phone and looked at the CT results which were posted online. It discussed a possible fracture where the ball transitions to the femur!
We arrive home. Her phone rings. It is my doctor. He says we need to go directly to an emergency room supported by Kaiser Permanente. The best and closest is an hour north.
My phone is laying on the back steps where I was getting into the truck. It has four missed calls from the Doctor.
My resourceful wife puts the groceries away and packs food and water and off we go. I am no longer sure of the time but it was still daylight. I never got out of the truck. As soon as I heard "broken," the pain set back in.
We arrived at the Emergency room after dark. There was pretty tight security. The admitting lady was behind bullet proof glass. She was not a happy and cheerful lady. Fortunately my doctor had called ahead. Still, I sat in the ER lobby with people dying of plague for an hour.
We met a nice older lady who had also fallen on the ice and hit her head. Her assisted living facility had. sent her to the ER by ambulance and she was on her own. She had strong opinions. It was a nice chat.
But our doctor had called ahead so there was a room reserved for me in the ER. They suggested I eat as i was on the schedule for surgery the next day and I couldn't eat after midnight. Then they took my clothes and hooked me up to an EKG and started saline and drugs. I kept telling the staff, "it only hurts if I move and you won't let me move so I don't need drugs," and they would say it I just would swallow this one and they would put a little more in my IV and I would be fine.
I thought my wife was going to get a hotel next door so I got her to leave. Turns out she slept in her truck, The ice storm returned and she didn't feel like driving.
At 2 am the power went out. When the generator kicked in all the alarms on every monitor in every room in the ER went off.
Then the fire alarm went off. One of those calm female voices that alway herald doom in disaster movies was repeating, "Code red in Mechanical room 5."
I could hear the nurses talking. "You think there really is a fire?" The other nurse thought it was a drill. No one really knew what to do. No one knew the password for the computer. Finally it was decided that it was just something to do with the generator.
Next, a lady started wandering around screaming that "they" took her water. This was the only hospital open due to the ice storm and ambulances were bringing in people constantly. (There were unfortunates lined up on gurneys in the halls. I was fortunate to have my own tiny room.)
I heard the nurses talking. Apparently she had spiked it her water bottle with Valium. She said she had a prescription. If so I suppose that could be liquid, otherwise it was just a crushed pill. Security was called, as soon as security cornered her she started yelling, "rape." I heard the nurses discussing a strategy, They gave her food and shipped her off to jail.
I was in the tiny room for 24hrs. Periodically my monitor would go off for no reason. I was on a combo of pain pills that included Morphine shot into my IV and Oxycodone and was just in kind of a daze. I would say, "no it doesn't hurt, I am not moving," and then I would take more drugs.
At some point my wife returned. At some point a surgeon came in and said I had a fractured femur. This means at some point there was an x-ray taken. At some point my daughter arrived. My wife and daughter took a break and came back with left overs from Dim Sum. This was awesome as the hospital food was not the best. Then, at some point I was moved to a different room.
My new neighbor was a pioneer in the Oregon Wine industry. He was a very nice guy who had just had gall bladder surgery. His stomach had not started working but he was not aware. When we got supper he ordered a lot of foods like pudding and fruit juice and then he spent the night in pain.
I was given food and a doctor came to consult. I suspect this was Friday. I am not sure as there seemed to be more pain medication involved. I know I had a 12 hour fast, again, and I know my room mate spent the night sick as a dog.
Saturday morning I had the surgery. My surgeon tried to talk me into a spinal injection. Spinal's hurt like heck and then if you don't get the right drugs you remember what they do to you. He almost had me convinced. I had one more consultation with a person dressed in white. This person could have been an angel. This person discussed the operation and supported my need for a full knockout. I think it was the nurse who came to transport me. I also have this feeling that my nurses were highly entertained when conversing with me. I was as high as a kite. Perhaps I should go back and read my cell phone text conversations from this time period for a more accurate understanding.
Anyway....
I must now drag myself to the restroom. And by drag I mean teeter on crutches.
Next installment will relate my surgery, my new roommate, and how I got sent home something like two days too soon. Keep in mind I was highly medicated but I didn't really understand how high I was. My only clue was having trouble remembering things and concentrating. This is kind of a normal problem for me.
I am not sure that the Hospital's pain management theory is exactly on point. It does work to give you Oxy to kill the pain and stool softeners to cure the Oxy side effects and I do love morphine, but I was actually called on to make health care decisions.
Freezing rain is absolutely the worst Unless you have a fourwheeler, warm clothes, and a frozen duckpond.
This morning I went to the barn to get the pickup belonging to my lovely and gracious wife and I hit the ground again. Only this time it was solid ice which is of course like hitting concrete.
The light is from the bale press facility up the road. The shine is from ice on the road. This should have been a clue for me, but it was not...
The highway in front of our house was a sheet of ice and so I just sort of skated. That was fine. It was when I hit the frozen driveway and thought I could walk that my feet left the anchorage of Earth and I headed sideways for New Zealand.
Of course I landed on my other knee. At least I didn't break my hip.
I crawled to the chicken fence and pulled myself upright. I found I could not walk. However, using the fence I could shuffle slowly.
I called my wife who made a path across the yard out of old towels so I had traction and also held me up.
I am happy to say I did not break my hip.
My first thought was "I've fallen and I can't get up," the second was, "oh crap.... I am now officially old," and that statement was not just from remembering the commerical.
So I am back on the couch with heat and ice.
I am looking at the bright side. This is more efficient than just having one knee screwed up. I can make better use of the hot pad and the ice pack. Before I only had one knee to ice and it seemed like a waste of a perfectly good ice pack. Now I can put the ice pack on my left leg and knee till it goes numb while I put the hot pad on my other knee. Then I just rotate. Great plan until the ice pack gets warm.
My wife brought me home made custard pie, hot tea, and Advil so it is not so bad. Needless to say, she is not going to work this morning.
However, another three days of not moving, then working on tractors in pain is not really appealing to me. I pride myself on being lazy but there is a point where I either need to get up and go to work or I am going to buy a 3D printer on Ebay...
The cat is plotting my demise I am sure
However, my friend who lives in NYC called and I was able to give him questionable advice on testing the heating element in his hot tub. I really hope he calls me back ,and is fine, as the last electrical work I did resulted in a test of the GFI circuit and a minor explosion.
Also, This is really good pie. No, there is none left. Don't even think about showing up just for pie...
I figured out how to apply for the Oregon Health Plan, (healthcare.gov) I thought I had selected a plan on Sunday but I think I actually selected the spinning beach ball. This morning when I tried to log in I got a screen telling me I missed the deadline. Insurance is pretty much overrated anyhow.
We are having temperatures well below freezing. The weather front came in at the start of the weekend with high winds and freezing rain which turned to sleet and then turned back to snow. Today we are going to get freezing rain. Tomorrow it is supposed to warm into the 40's and rain.
Instead of charging and servicing my generator I fixed the tail light on the Gator so I could slide corners on the highway. The Gator is not a very good off road vehicle. It has low ground clearance, is sort of heavy, has no power, poor brakes, and the belt slips if wet.
Of course I do take it off road.
Like the infamous engine on the Rock Island Line. I was ok going but I didn't get back...
I took my White 2-60 to pull it out. However, the FWA has failed. The lever moves back and forth but it does not engage. When I got the Gator out and tried to start it I discovered battery had not charged. So, I had to tow it up the hill behind the house to get home. It was a little challenging on ice with no FWA.
I should be making feed. The ground is frozen and I can drive the forklift anywhere. However, I am lazy. Also, when the Chiropractor worked on my knee yesterday, things moved around. I am putting ice on it this morning. You would think working outside in 19 degree weather would be better than ice. But, it is not.
For those who were worried about my brush with Socialism, now that my application did't process and I am going to wait on hold for hours for cheap crappy healthcare I am leaning more towards being an anarchist.
A cold front happened. We all know that Global Climate change means every weather event is a Crisis. Today was cold. Cold enough to freeze the cannon balls off a brass cannon ball holder. Colder than the posterior of someone digging a well, colder than,,,
It was actually 19 degrees. I don't know if the precipitation was freezing rain, snow, sleet, or windblown ice particles capable of removing paint. My shop door froze shut. The woodpile is covered in ice and sticks of wood are slow to burn. The wind is howling around the corner. The wolf is at the door.
Actually it is just the little doggie in a down sweater who wants in but he was urgent.
I have been attempting to get insurance. The Federal gubment is very happy to provide me with cheap and not very good coverage if only i do not get another job. I am now an ardent socialist. I hope everyone works hard so I don't have to!
I finally go so annoyed with the insurance process that I went out to the shop to fix the lights on the gator. The tail lights do not work. I want to be able to George Jones the Gator into town and annoy my wife. But, I feel like I should have tail lights and at least one turn signal. Hopefully the right one so I can turn across traffic.
The cab needs to come off for structural repairs and if I did that I could remove the hood and just rewire the whole thing. There are too many connectors and splices.
Finally I got frustrated when I heard the nephews on their four wheelers and just put it all back together. But by the time I got it out of the shop they had gone home, I cut cookies by myself until my wife texted to see if I were becoming dizzy.
So I went home and struggled with the fire. I want to be somewhere warm...
According to my weather app this will last two days. Then back to just wet and cold.
Those loyal readers who have nothing to do on a winter day but look at Tractorhouse online may recall my misadventure with my knee.
I am not about to crawl up ladders but I can now get around. I am using the cold vs hot theory. I apply an icepack and when my knee goes numb from cold I apply heat. This method may or may not speed healing but it makes me feel like I am doing something.
I am also using liberal doses of Hemp Tonic. I have gallons of the stuff.
The first day I an elixir of CBD crude dissolved in Everclear, For those of you who live abroad or happen to be strict Baptists, This is a cheap 180 proof grain alcohol. I used Everclear because I didn't want some bozo to attempt a shot of Hemp juice and then die from drinking rubbing alcohol. Although, one taste of my Elixir of hemp buds, (Budd's dank Buds dissolved in booze, BDBDB) would certainly put one off the sauce for a month!
The point of using alcohol is that the alcohol evaporates leaving the CBD on your skin. You don't wash that area for a couple days, repeating the application, and it is supposed to relieve joint pain. I got this recipe from the "Latinx" folks at work who happen to all come from Mexico. There are many uses for "The Devils Lettuce," when you have a lot of it sitting around, left over from the local export business.
I have also tried the CBD crude dissolved in Coconut oil. This is rubbed into the skin and works well with heat. Although it turns your wife's heating pad green if care is not used. The Coconut oil mixture can be taken internally. The recommended dose according to my advisor was two drops under your tongue. Most people I know dump a whole dropper full in a cup of coffee. It is an anti-inflammatory and might protect against COVID. (During COVID we consumed a lot of it at work and no one got COVID so I say it was a success!)
I have been attempting to get insurance though the Oregon Health Plan. My former employer is supposedly sending me paperwork telling me how to continue my health coverage through COBRA. But who knows, maybe the entire HR department quit again. It has been known to happen.
Somehow I got a scam website that looked exactly like the correct website, you know like healthcare.gub.indiansweatshop, instead of a healthcare.gov. Easy mistake... Maybe I should not have been testing hemp products and using a computer, who would have thunk?
Now I am bombarded with insurance provider calls so I just don't answer my phone.
I did try my local insurance agent, "why yes you are still in our system, my! my! It has been 20 years! She got my hooked up with healthcare.gov and now I have to compare plans and it is all very confusing. It is enough to drive one back to the vial of hemp Elixir, Almost...
But now my icepack is warm and my coffee is cold and so I shall stagger out the door and attempt to work. It is very important to have goals!
Addendum: I am sad to see that after wasting hours of precious university time wading though posts about No-Till planting, White tractors, and feed grinding, in a determined attempt to see which grounder was making fun of them, no one there seems to be still reading my blog. Perhaps they learned all they needed to about out dated music and grumpy old white guy stuff. Lots of hits from Canada though! (I actually had to laugh at the efforts to find me. Grounds staff consists of three to eight people, two were white males, one was very definitely not on a mower in the baseball field. Still, it took effort!
I have a friend who is smart. This a very handy thing to have. I wish now for a friend that is lucky, and I shall hang out with him more...
I have been slowly getting back into making feed. Making feed is a pain in the butt. It is dirty and cold and barley dust itches. However, there always seems to be extra grain that someone needs to get rid of. Or bottom bales of otherwise nice alfalfa that can't be sold as they have dirt stuck to them
Using a hammer mill to grind old hay or grain seems to rejuvenate it. When I have sent samples in for testing the feed value is good and the animals like the feed.
Mixing a lot of different ingredients can be a little frustrating if you don't have a scale and batch programing on your mixer/grinder. I have a scale I made from cheap Chinese parts and I use a large bin to combine ingredients, but it is rather awkward. as I then lift the bin over the top of the mixer/grinder and dump it in.
Each ingredient has a different percent protein and a different cost. This requires constant calculations to insure a target feed value. It is not terribly difficult as I know that mixing a third peas with 2/3 other grains will get me close. But keeping a running total of cost lets you change rates to save money but still hit your target protein content.
Last year I ran into problems with unexpected price increases on certain ingredients. I had to raise my prices, but when you are only making ten cents per pound, a two cent price change can make a big difference.
The obvious choice would be an Excel spreadsheet. have been trying to remember how to do spreadsheets. I get mixed up, but I have a friend...
I now have a spreadsheet which allows me to enter the type of ingredient, the amount of the ingredient, percent protein, and the price per pound and it will calculate total protein, total cost per pound, and total pounds of the mix. This then allows me to add the last ingredient to balance the mix. It really works well. I wish it were an app.
I can use this spreadsheet on my phone (if I use magnifiers.) It needs a little tweaking as some things don''t transfer from Excel to the Numbers app on my I phone. It would also be nice to have another entry so that I could add the charge for mixing and grinding.
The way I get around being a licensed feed mill is that I charge for materials and for grinding. I am not selling feed. This way I can change the mix to suit the customer as well as tweak it for what is available. Selling a "feed" would require a label and a guaranteed feed analysis. Which sort of defeats the point of my niche processing idea.
"There is a dark cloud hovering behind every silver lining," said everyone's favorite, sometimes a great blogger, never a great groundskeeper, somewhat Lazy Farmer, Mr. Budd E. (educateded) Shepherd.
Mr. BS had just got the text from the Lovely and Gracious Mrs. Shepherd that the pan was on the griddle and was racing for his dinner when his feet and the earth became discombobulated and he landed in the center of a large mud puddle.
Always a bit prone to conspiracies and hyperbole, the intrepid sprinter did in fact have a theory.
"I was swerving to avoid the Diversity, Equity, and Indoctrination secret police when they zapped me with the pink ray. I narrowly averted changing pronouns," said Mr. Shepherd. "Stop drop and roll, it will save you every time," he exclaimed.
Other sources which wish to remain anonymous but could have been watching say Mr. Shepherd should not have been running at his advanced age and might also be just a touch on the loony side. "All that time stripping hemp seems to affected his tenuous grip on reality," reported our source.
Mr. Shepherd eventually confessed to the foolishness of his actions, but offered this explanation.
"If I get there in time Mirandy let's me lick the spoon," he said.
The Lazy farmer is now propped up in bed with a heating pad, a bottle of pills, and not nary a drop of old number seven.
Mr. Lazy F says he does in fact have a plan for recovery. "In the panty there is hemp tonic, lots and lots of hemp tonic. I could bathe in hemp tonic. As soon as I can actually get out of bed I shall self medicate!"
Sometimes the best plan is, "Hang it to Houston and Hammer Down!" To quote a dear departed friend. Of which there seems to be more and more of these days. Departed, that is...
In other news, the supposed "retirement," of Mr. Shepherd has been less relaxing than planned.
"For eight years my plan has been to quit my job and sit in the hot tub all day while my wife works, then act like I actually did something. But the hot tub is cold and there was dishes to do and then I put the bacon on the wrong self and got grease inside the oven and then the tarp blew off my motorcycle hiding tent, and there was cool stuff at harbor freight, and then I started working on a tractor, but got distracted and started cleaning my shop, and then I rebuilt a hydraulic motor, then the tractor ran out of diesel right when I wanted to test the motor, and so I had to bleed the lines and then I got distracted by the 66 Ford pickup my nephews got running for me and I started that, and then I was late for my dinner... It's a rough life," rambled Mr. Shepherd.
Plans for the future include, actually getting out of bed... Fulfilling multiple chicken feed orders, replacing bushings in the no-till drill, and scaring geese off the annual ryegrass fields.
I have been making feed. There is a demand for pellets if I could get them to stay together and cooled and do it cost effectively.
I had major plans for today.
The weather outside is cold and wet and I am in fact a lazy farmer. So I am working on my end of the year book keeping. Meaning, trying to upload boring videos to youTube and listening to old cassette tapes.
But I did have plans. In fact I was thinking about going to work, actually visualizing going out the door when my phone lights up. It is someone who was once featured in my blog and while he was not one who complained, he also doesn't want to be mentioned. This is too bad because he is a super interesting person. (Who is of course also a former employee.) (upper management, not a grunt)
He felt there should be a fourth category. But I won't go there. He also suggested pointing out that a lot of stuff I write should have a disclaimer. It is either satire or I just sound mean. Great points.
We were talking about students and how those of us in Grounds interacted.
I really was fortunate to make friends with people like the former President who has had so many life experiences and never seems to give up encouraging me to become a positive person.
I will probably come back and edit this post later to remove references to my past life but for now here it is.
Later, I need to go out and remove the drive motor on the conveyer I use to cool the pellets. Saturday I was using an auger to move and cool the pellets and it ground them up really bad. The pellets are really soft when hot.
I have made a list of goals for the week. I must pull the motor/transmission on a 2-155 and fix the four wheel drive on my 2-60. Then I need to find shop space to tear the No-Till drill apart and do deferred upkeep or maybe I should do that first. However, I do need to make some cash so I have a few other things to work on.
We shall see what we shall see. It is so good to be free! You just can't imagine.
Hi Ralph, I don't know what has gone wrong but I can't reply to comments on my blog. I am worried about Gorges Grouse but the fellow from Africa has reappeared. Ed Winkle contacted me but I feel that is a fraud It didn't really sound like Ed from beyond the pale or even in real life. This internet life is confusing.
Thanks Mr. 706. We shall see what we shall see.
Also, I got feedback on my post from formerly important people at my former college. They felt my tone was bad. I actually was justifying my separation. I appreciate the feedback but I am glad to be gone. I understand that my comment on the three types of people at the college sounds harsh but it is pretty accurate. I am going to remove the post as soon as I come up with another one.
I am sure someone will screen shot it and probably email it to my next real employer but I actually don''t really plan on having another real employer so what ever. Perhaps the folks in Melrose can enjoy more posts about making pig feed in future because that is what this blog will be about. I don't seem much point in a critique if there is nothing to be learned from it.
Have a great day! I will try to figure out what has gone wrong with blogger and get back on track.
The Lazy Farmer has returned. I no longer work at the University. I wanted to make it to No-till season and then transition into a new job. However, things moved faster than anticipated so I can now blog again.
I have a lot to do. I put my life on hold for eight years and I am pretty far behind. I suspect if I would have worked another year there for the insurance it would have been too late to go back to my real life.
It is really amazing how much my attitudes have changed during my stint in Purgatory. There is no way in hell I would support sending a kid to a liberal arts University. I have talked to way too many frustrated young people who resent the current of Indoctrination vs education that is the hallmark of any of the arts and sciences in the University system.
The sun is out today and I am going to drive down to the river and scare geese off the field. Later in the month the stress of farming will sink in, but I am going to enjoy the sense of relief I feel from moving on.
(Note: some blog posts are missing as I was attempting to remove things found offensive by the HR department. I can't quite remember how far I got so it is what it is. If it bugs you complain)
The odd collection of music I attempted to listen to today
The offensive book I am attempting to read in my spare time
You just type your comment in the text box below the post. You can be anyone you want. And...Would the joker who keeps clicking "offensive" please leave an explanation ?!
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