The Useful Duck!

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Sunday, January 31, 2010

Hay and straw sales to horsey folk

Yesterday I sold several loads of hay. Small loads of hay. It hardly made a tent in the barn. We have like ten semi truck loads to go.
I was going to work on my pickup truck engine. I took it to a shop to be repaired and there were a lot of small things wrong with it. Turns out that I bought new main bearings, oil pump, cam set, water pump, radiator and half the exhaust manifold bolts were broken off. The mechanic suggested that I drill them out for him. So, that was what I was going to do Saturday.
The last sale was at 3:30 for a load of straw. I had to meet them at a different barn for the straw. The lady had talked her neighbor into hauling for her. He had a extended cab dodge 4wd with racks, and a trailer made out of a 1968 Chevy 3/4 ton truck. First the hyster squeeze wouldn't start. (actually I think it is a cat) Then she decided the bales were not as heavy as I said so she wanted me to weigh the bales. There is an old Fairbanks-Morse truck scales there. She had asked me the weight and I said 100 to 110 lbs which came out to 18 bales to the ton. What I needed to say was $3 per bale. That would just be simple. Anyway.... I put the block of straw on the scale and weighed the block, then I divided the weight by the number of bales. I got 107lbs. Last block I sold-a couple months ago was 109 lbs. So this was a little lighter. Still in the 18 bales per ton range.
She thanked me for weighing it.
Next we loaded the pickup and trailer. I lifted the block of straw with the squeeze and parked it behind the truck. I threw down the bales and the fellow with the pickup then stacked the bales four high in the pickup. But, instead of going on layer at a time and taking advantage of the height of the squeeze, he the threw the bales back up and worked his way from front to back instead of up one layer at a time. I didn't say anything.
They got two tonnes on their truck and trailer and headed off down highway 18. I could see the traffic back up instantly. I took an alternate route to Sheridan.
You know the way to get a good deal is not to question the weight or the price. It is to be nice and friendly and complement the farmer on the quality of his product. It he is going to rip you off he will do it no matter. She did not watch me set the scales, (I actually forgot to zero the scales before I used them so the error could have gone either way...) I was going to throw in a few extra bales and had thought about selling the straw for $45 a ton instead of $50. It is kind of annoying to be questioned on the weight and the price. That is why I needed to have a per bale price. It solves that whole question of how many bales to the ton.
The mechanic was getting his supper so I went to CarQuest to pick up a couple things I had driven off and left setting somewhere. I forgot my hammer and my 3/8ths tap, I also needed a center punch but I forgot that also.
It seems that when ever I claim to be really good at something I soon get cut down to size. The first bolt I drilled out went crooked. I didn't see his torch which is what I should have used. I ended up tapping the hole but instead of the old threads coming out I drifted into the side of the block. So, I suppose the manifold won't fit right. I got the next one crooked as well. We heated that one and it came out. The third one the mechanic "showed" me how to center punch the bolt which was exactly what I was trying to do. It was a frustrating experience. If I would have been in my own shop by myself I could have done it. As it was I did three holes and it was 8:30 pm. I went home and played lego trains with Sadie. Later we had a "sleep over" as she termed it. She put blankets out on the floor and we laid on the floor and watched movies. It turned out to be a lot later evening than I had thought. We slept on the floor. I am a bit stiff this morning and Sadie is grumpy. She wants me to teach her her how to play guitar. I don't know how to play guitar but have had lots of lessons. She get frustrated because she is not instantly good. I don't know how to get her out of that attitude.
Update at 11:42. I think we stayed up to late last night. I've been a bit under the weather and so when my wife suggested that I go back to bed and she take Sadie to church I took her up on the offer. Well, the second time she made it. I was in bed with my head under the pillows when I heard the meltdown. I don't know all the details but S. started crying. I got up and tried to figure out the problem. There were two unhappy females in the house. One was sent to bed and the other is taking things to GoodWill. I retreated to the bedroom. I needed to just get it done this morning. I just wanted a break... I didn't notice the time last night as I got home late. Such is life...

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Northwest Ag Show

We spent Tuesday through Thursday at the Northwest Agricultural Exposition. My dad was one of the first exhibitors there. Then skipped for 20 years, then came back in 1998 or so.
We sell hay moisture testers, and moisture testers for grain, soil, compost, baler stroke counters, dew alarms, and more stuff I can't remember. The show was terrible. No one has money, no one signed information cards. Dad was pretty depressed.
Sadie came for one day. That was the only day we were busy. She wore sweatpants that say "love" on  them. I did not realize this is considered slut wear. Several people pointed it out to me. I am pretty much out of touch with pop culture. I don't think she has a clue...
Here is a photo of her and Grandpa setting out to see the show. The show organizers had some scooters to let out. This is the first time in a while that Dad has got to make the tour. Later, he had Sadie drive. She sat on his lap. Several people commented that she was a better driver than her Grandfather. Did not get the details, just a lot of laughs. Who knows?
Note: If you look closely at the right hand side of the picture you can see a lady with a tan sweater and really tight jeans walking towards Dad and Sadie. She was also an exhibitor. She made a trip every half hour past our booth on her way to the bathroom. Perhaps she had a medical problem. She had a very determined walk. I did not ask her what was wrong. Possibly her jeans were so tight that she would loose feeling in her legs every 45 minutes if she did not release some pressure on the half hour?
Later we were home...
A package arrived!
I bought lego train tracks on ebay. The seller said they were broken and dirty. They were fine and best of all, not real spendy. We couldn't afford the actual train. Sadie is having a great time anyway. She is building her own trains.
I must now go to work. 

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Anderson Cooper is a super hero

I kind of hate Anderson Cooper. He is the kind of a smarmy pretentious reporter that you really hope will get hit by the flying car when his is reporting live during the hurricane. The nice suits, the perfect hair, the muscles right out of a gym. Oh yes and we find out he has an alternative lifestyle. Well isn't that just perfect. What an angle, pretty, white and gay. That is so 21st century.
Ed Winkle was so wrong calling him a hypocrite over the whole cruise boat fiasco.
Anderson Cooper rescued a boy from a mob!
That was very special.
Rich white guy and a brown skinned boy. Never saw that one a commin' did ya!
Hmm-cynical much?

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

The idiots who run our state...

The legislature in the Sate of Oregon is a bunch of morons. Our official state color should be purple cause we are a bunch of maroons....
See this article in the Wall Street Journal:

This outburst was brought up by a relative's impassioned plea to vote for the tax increases so that the handicapped will not have their funding cut.
I have to think of the other relative who worked for the state legislature who said the people she worked for were such a bunch of nice people. Nice people who are stupid and still stupid and make stupid laws and it doesn't really matter if they are nice or not.
So the Oregon legislature will not cut their bloated budget to fit the economic crisis, we have the second highest unemployment in the nation, and they want to tax the gross income on corporations?  The WSJ says over $600,000 but locals were saying $150,000 which would hit pretty close to home.
And of course they want to cut, libraries, and handicapped, because they sure as heck are not going to cut the bloated payrolls in Salem, or cut some staff like everyone else has had to do.
This great ideas in taxation have been put before the voters for approval. I have pretty mixed feelings. On one hand I think they should pass. I would like to see the people who voted for this stuff really suffer, see the state collapse just like California. But...the folks who run California don't seem to be learning so why would we? In the end, there would just be more taxes, the clever folks would be happy, we would be broke.
We are screwed.
This is why people left Europe and moved to America...
We are off to the AgShow. It will be dismal, farmers are all broke.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Dad turns 91 and I use violence to solve a problem!

We have been working to get ready for the big agricultural show in Portland. Dad has been making his usual efforts with the photocopier and tends to obsess a bit about certain missing items.
We sell moisture testers for hay, grain, soil, compost, and what ever... This is Dad in last year's booth.

We were having our coffee break when there came a crash from Dad's office. I jumped up right away as I had been trying to wirelessly print through Dad's computer and I figured that the printer has upset a precariously placed notebook.
The problem was a bit more serious. It seems that there was a icecream container attached to the ceiling to contain the various drip during heavy rains. After a number of wet months the bucket filled and was forgotten. During coffee time the screw eye had pulled out of the ceiling and the bucket dropped right down on the middle of the printer. Water was every where. We had to rescue two laptops and dry out the desk. The laptops we pulled the batteries and vacuumed them out very well.
I then took the opportunity to hook directly to the printer but the print head had been badly knocked out of alignment and there were lines in the printouts. I used the printer software to try and adjust the print head but to no avail.
I finally gave up and went home.
Today we had Dad's 91st birthday party at my brother's house across the machinery lot. His two brothers were there and my other brother and his son and his father-in-law were there. They were searching for 1941 Chevy pickup parts to build a truck for the son. We have a couple of those.
Sadie had a very bad cough and so her and Laura stayed home.
There were some interesting discussions. I missed part of the one, it was how Grandpa and Grandma got together. They also told the story of their pet goat and how they got it up on the roof of the grainery and then pushed it off. They were quite worried they had killed it but it was ok.
They talked about going to church in Independence. They parked the car at Uncle Jack Greens house and stored the seats in the barn rafters. It was some sort of touring car. Maxwell or something. When there was rain or snow there would be a farmer with a team of horses by the bridge on the Luckimute (sp?) river to pull the cars up the hill. Once they came upon an accident and Grandpa and Uncle Jack had to carry the lady up the hill. Dad said she was unconscious. There first electricity came from a delco light plant. Before that they used "Flamo" gas lights. You mixed something with water to get light, said uncle Ted.
After the birthday party dad was worried about his iBook which I forgot to restart after the bucket incident. My brother's Pismo was fine. So I went out and put the battery in it and pushed the power button. It came to life right away. I hooked it to the printer and it started printing. My document had spooled on Dad's computer's desktop printer. (I love macs. They just seem to work on their own most of the time)
I was going to try adjusting the printer through software but I remembered how long it took me to admit failure the day before. I also had to go to the bathroom really bad as I drank a lot of coffee. I thought to myself. You know it got out of alignment by having a bucket of water dropped on it. It is already broken so what more can I do to it.
So... I turned the printer upside down and hit it as hard as I could with my hand. Then I turned it back over and tried printing.
Perfect text alignment!
Who ever said violence never solves anything!

My luck continued-It is not the luck it is how you deal with it...

If you have all been following the saga of the international truck and my bad luck you are all probably anxiously waiting with bated breath for the next installment. (What is bated breath anyway)
Let me recap.
I back the truck out of the shop and the transmission fails.
I drop the cell phone in the bathtub.
The fellow working on my ferd pickup ran over his foot with the Ivy Highlift and is probably dying of cancer. Oops-that is another topic.
How I fixed the phone.
First I removed the battery.
Then I said, "oh fiddle!' That helped quite a bit.
I figured it was dead anyway and why not just go ahead and enjoy a nice bath while the water is still hot. So I did.
What I should have done next was to use the vacuum cleaner on it. You should suck out all the water right away. Using heat can damage the electronic circuitry.
Instead I finished my bath and then wiped it down real well with paper towels. Then i stuck it in a jar of rice. That desiccant stuff that comes with cell phones and electronic stuff also works. But, I don't really save the stuff one pack at a time. I know it says do not eat of the package. Because has this warning somehow it worries me that someone actually will eat it, so I throw it away.
The rice will absorb the water but not as well as a bowl full of desiccant.
Anyway-the next morning I pulled the phone out of the rice. I put the battery back in the phone and pushed the "on" button.
The little chimes sounded and there was my phone, as good as new.
Another little success story...
In conclusion-what to do if you drop your phone in water. Say, "oh fiddle!" Take the battery out right away. Suck the water out of it with a shop vac. Then stick the phone into a bag of rice and leave it overnight. There you go.
As to the International truck. I have found another transmission. I don't know if it is in perfect shape, but then I have no reason to think it is dead. It is in a truck that a neighbor wants to get rid of. I think we will try and get it Monday. If it doesn't rain in buckets...

Thursday, January 21, 2010

My luck...

Perhaps you have been following the long drawn out saga of my International truck engine swap. It was actually a lot of work to put the engine out of a 1974 truck into my 1971 truck. Same engine, a 478 cu inch v-8. Lots of different airlines and oil lines. Took us a couple days to do and redo all the hoses and connections on the engine.
SO we backed it out of the shop and pulled it alongside to put the hood on. Then I went to back it up so I could pull back into the shop. It wouldn't move.
It turns out that the auxiliary transmission decided to fail. The day I get the engine to run the 4 speed dana-spicer "brownie" takes a crap on me.
The thing is, it was popping out of second gear. I tried to get my former employee to pull the top of the transmission to see what was up. But he thought it was too much work to raise the bed, put the block under it, and pull out the six bolts holding the top on. I know I should have done it myself...
There is probably some sort of job that I am good at that I could get paid well to do. I just don't have a clue what it is.
 -Oh, and then I dropped my 2-month-old cell phone in the bathtub. I've had it two stinking months and I can't get an upgrade for another month.  I liked that phone. I had the photos I took at antique powerland when we got out private tour yesterday. I had some really good Sadie photos I didn't send to the Verizon photo depository.

A link, but nothing to say...

 I've got nothing to say...
Got my International truck to start last night.
Am not ready for the Ag Show.

This is a cool link....

if you like magnets-oh remember those little scottie dog magnets from years ago. They were in a little white and red box. There was a black dog and a white dog and they would repel and attract each other according to how you pointed the magnets.
They were pretty cool at age 5.

I need to think of something to say so I can write the Ed blog...

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Crazy People

I never watch TV news. In fact we only get public television. I was directed to the local station's website: to look at this article.
 Check out the comments-and I quote:
Again the dastardly Bush/Cheney/Reagan/ Ivanna Trump compiling U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service demeans all Anatidae members by implying they are subordinate to humans. One has to look no further then the Hudson River disaster involving United Airways and the icy sadism of pilot Chelsey Sulleberg III who deliberately flew his fossil fueled jet into a flock of innocent geese as proof of the ongoing war on winged victims. Outside of the passengers and crew of that crash, there were no survivors and the death toll amongst the birds, insects and fish will never be known. Geese, like all of Goddess's creations have the Constitutional right to pursue happiness free of Neo-KKKon harassment. But don't believe me or other members of the PGRSV dens of the NW. Read the Mission Statements of PETA, the Sierra Club, Earth First!, and the anti-Jimmy Dean/Col. Saunders/Oscar Meyer Liberation Manifesto for the complete and unfettered truth."

I see that Stupidtown's intern doing Mayor is being defended again. Sam Adams is a joke. The intern was underage. Of course since he is Gay he falls under-yes! You guessed it-The Undeniable Virtue of the Oppressed."
Check out the story and the comments from the KGW site. The idiots who support him are unable to distinguish between being gay and statutory rape. Shall we say the very definition of sexual misconduct-befriending an underage person and offering them a job and in return getting sex. So what if the guy is selling his story. He is a pretty screwed up person. Wonder why? Nothing like blaming the victim.

And then a poor fellow fell into an old septic tank and drowned.That would ruin your weekend.

In other news, I'm supposed to be writing for Ed Winkle while he is on vacation but I've got nothing to say to real farmers.

I get up on the wrong side of bed

I have issues this morning. We had a huge windstorm last night. Somehow Sadie has got it in her head that the tree over her room might fall on her. She also took a 4 hour nap yesterday afternoon. So she didn't sleep. She crawled in bed with us.
We all woke up at 7 a.m.
The TV went on right away. I take a few minutes to get going in the morning. The TV is almost painful. Curious George is kind of stupid, Sid the Science Kid is mindnumbingly  awful. It would be pretty easy to turn them off.
And Dad's website is expiring. We cancel the credit card for the automatical renewal and now I have to wade through the complicated mish-mash of
And we need to work on his website but how do you get that done? Look at and could someone tell me how to do a new website?
And then...I tried to check the mail for this blog.
I have used for years. I dumped my old hotmail account years ago when it got to be painfully slow. I discovered which was a pretty much bare-bones online email box.
Now it has been purchased by AOL. America Online is the worst online service ever. I think it defines the term bloatware. I used to enjoy the free coaster that they sent out all the time and I actually signed up with them from time to time to have internet access while traveling. The last time I signed up it was such a pain in the arse to cancel that I decided I would rather do a long distance call to OnlineMac here locally than I would do a toll-free call to AOL.
Modern internet services don't require carrying a modem cable. Wireless free internet has help block the pain and suffering of the slow and annoy AOL interface. But, now has brought it back. I'm going to have to link a new email address to the Daily  Strumpet.
Which brings up another sore sore spot.
I'd like to change my blog name. I want but some lazy person is hogging the name and is too lazy to update his blog.

In another sideline I have contemplated another Daily Strumpet. Anyone interested? Have to think up some good news events.

OPB is advertising a forum debating tax increase measures. How could anyone think a tax increase is a good idea. Unless you work for the government. But, if you do you would realize that in this time of economic problems tax increases would probably be counter productive.
After the clever folks gave trillions of our money to the banking industry I would NEVER vote for another tax increase of any amount. I would let government services completely stop before I would give them another dime...

And I have nothing to saw to Ed Winkle's fans at hymarkhispots.blogspot where I am supposed to be guess blogging this week.

And my head will explode in 3...2...1... POW!

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Three posts in one day...

I don't know why I keep ranting about the Haiti BS. It just raises issues with me. Then I end up defending people I don't really like.
What is interesting is the amazon cloud widget. It is supposed to come up with buying suggestions based on keywords in my blog. Why does it recommend the "Glee" sound track. That is a totally stupid show and I am so glad we can't watch it on the TV. Oh, the "gay" character is so oppressed and so misunderstood. I'm more than just a tad homophobic, but yet I think that these token characters are actually more offensive than I am? The alternate lifestyle people I know in real life are pretty much regular folks. But, I guess that does not make good TV viewing...
Now here are some keywords I would like to see.
Hydraulic Flow Control
Lego train
Marx toys
Webb Pierce
Jon Pertwee
Johnny Kidd
Tesla Coil
Norrin Radd
James Joyce
He that pisseth against the wall
I just tossed those last two in there to see what would happen. I like to put the later into Bible search programs. Hmm, that is a bit juvenile is it not?
Just a little free association. We will see what amazon does with it.
In retrospect-Perhaps a good psychotherapist could do something with it as well.

Danny Glover is an idiot

See this link: or this link provided by Mr. 706:
I am not going to mention Mr. PR of the 700 club as that will put him back on the list of names that is suggesting book titles for but.... Danny Glover is a total moron. His suggestion is not even based in fact. At least PR gave money...
Lets see the clever folks jump on him.
Unless I took it all out of contents because, I DIDN'T have the attention span to watch the youtube video. So sue me, I don't practice what I preach.
I just want a new flat belt for my hammer mill. And a lego train, and 1.2 million dollars. I don't ask for much.

I think I killed my Blog!

I signed up with Amazon associates so you can search books mentioned on this blog. It seems to have slowed things down a bit!
Any of you folks with a slow internet connection please comment and tell me if you can still load The Lazy Farmer.
If so, please buy stuff from Amazon by using my Amazon search feature, or the Cloud thing widget at the bottom of the page.
Should anyone happen by who wants to support the Lazy Farmer you can buy me something off my wish list. Just looking at my wish list should provide entertainment...
Or you can just cut the crap and donate 1.2 million to me through my paypal link!
So, if anyone has comments on my shameless efforts to get rich-comment away! I have pretty low expectations but it is really entertaining to see what Amazon thinks I'm talking about and the links to books they provide!
In news unrelated to my lazy efforts to become rich... I am listing to iTunes radio on the internet. Specifically the station, Boot Liquor on SomaFM. They were playing "I want you to want me" the old Cheap Trick song and it was set to banjo music. It was pretty good but iTunes has become so complicated I couldn't figure out how to get the mini-player to stay on top of everything else so I can see what I am hearing. Oh boy... now it is Iris Dement, she gets old in a hurry! Earlier it was Jim Croce singing about the dangers of cigarettes, strong drink, and wild women. A worthy cause on a Sunday morning when we should all be in Church...

Sunday Morning with Rick Steves and Seeder Meters

Sadie is at a friend's house. We may skip Church today. We like to watch Rick Steves Sunday morning. He goes all the places we can't afford to go. Today he was talking Turkey. After reading about the Islamic massacre of the Armenians it was mildly amusing to watch Rick tiptoe around it. It was sad to see the loss of some interesting cultures due to Islamifiacaion which is probably like desertificaiton. But I don't really know how to spell...

We just discovered we are going to the Northwest Ag Show. Dad was going to skip it this year. But, he got confused and paid his space rental. I have to come up with a new catalog this year. I have never figured out how to do this. Dad sells moisture testers for hay and soil and seed. Plus, what ever else he finds interesting like devices that count the number of strokes per hay bale, compost thermometers, pH meters, soil compaction meters and what ever else.
Somehow I need to get my wife excited about it. She is the expert in layout and design.
I want to buy some Seeder-meters to sell. See
Dave Berckes who is a farmer in Minnesota came up with a balance scale to figure out grain test weights. He also invented my favorite which is a balance scale for calibrating your grain drill. Every farmer needs at least one of these. You drive a measured distance while collecting the seed from one opener. (take the seed tube off the opener and put a bucket under it) You dump the seed in the cup on the balance scale, then move the little weight till the bubble level in the weight reads level. There is your lbs/acre. The distance you drive is determined by your drill spacing. I think my 7 1/2" spacing is 235 feet. It is easy to measure with my Calc-an-acre. It is harder to use when planting grass seed as it doesn't weigh enough, and the lbs per acre are so low that it doesn't register accurately. But-you can just drive 10x as far. I usually just fake it, but don't tell any of my customers. always comes out right....

Saturday, January 16, 2010

The Pat Robertson debate just shows how intolerant people are

Because he said nothing wrong!
I'm not going to repeat the previous post. Don't care that much. Look at this link that G706 posted in the comments section of the first post.
It is a pretty good blog-click here to read it at
Now read the comments.
Public opinion dictates-
1. Pat Robertson is a racist
2. Pat Robertson is an idiot
3. If Pat Robertson said Haitian revolutionaries made a deal with the devil it is not true
4. Since there is no God and no Devil and thus you can't make a deal with either one and it doesn't matter if you believe you did because you didn't and what you think doesn't matter.
I could go on...
The clever folks want to say there was no voodoo involved, and they say that voodoo does not worship the devil. They want to say that this legend is some sort of racist affront that implies that black people could not defeat the French on their own. What a load of crap.
Ok, the ceremony probably happened. A lot of folks in Haiti believe it. If so it was a bonding and planning meeting. They may or may not have called upon the devil. It would appear that people who oppose voodoo call it devil worship.
What is wrong with bringing this up? It is value neutral. So what if it happened.
There are people who obviously believe in it. Why can't you discuss that without labeling someone a racist? How does enlisting the help of spirits put down the Black race? If they had access to the devil then why not use it? What is wrong with Pat Robertson making a contrast between the founding fathers of the USA calling on God and the founders of the Haitian revolution calling on the devil?
If he is wrong he is wrong.
It brings an interesting background and perspective to the issue of what the heck make Haiti such a screwed up place. Look, if the people in Haiti believe a voodoo pact helped free them, and they follow the voodoo beliefs then would not that have an impact on their culture? Could we not debate if this is a good or a bad idea? 
This is more of an illustration of the sea change in how the clever people think than it is an observation of Pat Robertson's character.
You all need to note that the clever people of today are same as the clever folks of days gone by. In previous times they were God and Country and all else be damned. They were racists and segregationists because in the old days that was cutting edge. When most people believed in God, then they believed in God. When people started calling God "she" then they did likewise. They are not free thinkers, they are products of whatever university their parents paid good money to get them programmed.
Their powers of reasoning have not improved. Their ability to recognize open minded discourse has not improved. Their love of burning witches has not diminished-the terms they uses to describe witches have just changed. Those are the folks that will send you all off to the re-educations camps and it will be for your own good.
Pat Robertson lives in a disappearing world. Why is he a threat to anyone? If you don't believe like him then what he says is irrelevant... Who actually listens to him anyway? He probably gets all his ratings from clever folks looking to poke fun at him. Oh, no wait on that-None of those morons actually listened to him, or did any research on the validity of what he said.
Reminds me of the Question Authority bumper sticker. It always makes me want to ask, whose authority do I question...yours?
I have the universal bumper sticker. It would read, "I'm a dumbass." It could replace all other bumper stickers. Except mine which reads, "Keep American Beautiful-Drive a Studebaker."

I still need a 6 or 8 inch endless flatbelt. Needs to be from 20 to 40ft in length. I hope what I said about needing a flatbelt will not be attacked by some clever person. I have made no deals with good or bad spirits on this issue. There may or may not have been an appeal to the Saint Pauli Girl and spirits may have been involved but they were below the .07 percent limit. This may have impacted my interpretation of events surrounding the destruction of aforementioned flatbelt. I have no racist feelings towards busty German girls. In fact I kind of like them. But only in a chaste friendship sort of way.

Forget Lego Trains I need a flatbelt

I busted the belt for my hammermill! Where do I find a six or eight inch endless flatbelt that is 20 to 40 feet long? Any of you folks have a flatbelt setting in your barn?

Who cares about Pat Robertson...I want a lego train!

I've always wanted a lego train but they were too expensive. They are still too expensive. I find a train for say $20 and then I snipe it for $40 and it sells for $100 or in the case of the last train which had a really cool boat with it-$350...
I'd be happy with the old blue tracks, any tracks, any train. I can build stuff... I need a circle and a couple sidings. Just enough for the lego village Sadie and I have been building.

I guess with children starving all over the world we really don't need no stinking lego train now do we?
Plus, we got 500 feet of Tomica World blue track. which is worth zip on ebay... That is why it was cheap at Goodwill I guess.

Some train pictures from our house...


Friday, January 15, 2010

People have been going on about Pat Robertson and I'm annoyed

 I wrote most of this post the other day but didn't post as I get a little preachy. I've been hearing talk about Pat Robertson and his Haiti comment. At first I thought he was nuts but I actually looked it up online. I knew there was a legend about the voodoo thing but I thought Pat Robertson was probably full of crap. After looking it up I don't think he is as full of crap as I thought he was before. I wish the clever intellectual people would go be cynical about The Biggest Looser or American Idol or something else.
 The other day I was at the auto repair shop. It was the day of the Haitian earthquake. The Repair shop fellow's girlfriend came out and said she had been watching the 700 Club on TV. She is kind of a nasty girl friend. He met her on the internet. It was 42 degrees and pouring down rain. She was wearing a short top and really really tight jeans. Many people who frequent this shop refer to her as "muffin top." I can't figure out why. She seems nice.
She said they had been talking about the Haiti earthquake and that Pat Robertson has said something about the Haitian deal with the devil. I had to explain the legend that the leaders of the Haitian revolution at the end of the 1700's had supposedly made a deal with the devil to get rid of the French and had slaughtered a pig and had a voodoo sacrifice.
I wondered about this comment all day long.
It would seem the only Christians left in America are morons.
But...Last night I looked up the legends.
I will probably not get all the links posted today as I need to go to work and I am also trying to bid on a lego trainset on ebay.
And-it is all true...mostly I suppose.
Shortly after Aristide came to power the second time he recognized voodoo as an official religion of Haiti.
Voodoo and the deal with the devil was a major topic in this National Geographic article about Haiti.

This story from the BBC features a discussion of voodoo and has the quote, "Haiti is 95 percent Catholic and 100 percent voodoo. (lost my link to this story)

Here is a description of voodoo from an online encyclopedia. Pretty interesting.

An interesting editorial about the Haitian tragedy.

There there are the idiots who make up most of the population of the world:

I can't find my link to the BBC story about the famous deal with the devil in 1791. There was a dead pig and the drinking of blood.
Of course all the morons miss the point and belabor the obvious.
It is most likely true that a group of Haitian revolutionary figures met at the beginning of the revolution against France. They did what has been described as a voodoo ritual which included the drinking of the blood of a sacrificed pig. It has been described as a deal with the devil by many people. Whatever it was it signified the will of the attendees to wage a revolution sort of like the signing of the declaration of independence brought the American revolutionary folks together. That is not so hard to understand.
Voodoo is an important part of Haitian society. It has been rehabilitated as a family centered religion much the same way as Islam is labeled as a "religion of peace."
There is considerable debate over many aspects of voodoo which I don't intend to go into. I think that if Voodoo is an official religion of Haiti and if the majority of the people believe in it than it probably has a pretty profound effect on the nation's culture and attitudes and how the country responds to, and interprets major life events...
This is an interesting link...
Of course after independence the Haitians went around killing most of the white folks according to several histories I read. This is ok because the white people always have it coming. This is because of The Undeniable Virtue of the Oppressed.
So, Pat Robertson makes this comment about voodoo and all the pucker-bottoms go insane. Pat Robertson also is sending money and aid but that point gets ignored.
The point of the comment was that Pat Robertson suggested that there is a link between the problems Haiti has suffered and this practice of Voodoo and their infamous deal with the devil-or what ever spirit they appealed to.
Pat Robertson probably did bring up an important point. Many people think that Voodoo is not the most healthy religion to be a part of. You can look at all the information online and make your own decision.
What I really wonder is how many people actually did a Google search for Haiti and Voodoo. The other thing I wonder is where the really good article about Voodoo and Aristide went. It was part of a BBC news series.
Oh, and by the way, Aristide seems to be pretty much a crook. Of course the left and the USA love him. Just my opinion after reading all about this.
I am not really a Pat Robertson supporter. I don't agree with his theology. I think he needs to keep his mouth shut sometimes. I kind of am embarrassed by the whole 700 Club in general. I don't see any great Christian theologians like C.S. Lewis or even leaders like Billy Graham.

Someone who is more interesting than I

I couldn't subscribe to him as I am not smart enough. This fellow has some interesting comments.
It is

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Lego Trains

Sadie and I have been looking at lego trains. Her cousin has a newer one and it is pretty cool. I've been thinking I could find an older train and get a setup on the cheap.
So, I found this auction for a 30 year old train. This is the train I wanted when I was a kid. It looked like it would go at a reasonable rate. It was a $23 for most of the time it was listed. I thought I would get it by sniping it at the last minute for $40. That is more than I wanted to pay but, there we not that many bids. It went for $92 or something like that. I bet the person buying it is not even going to play with it. I ain't gonna pay $100 for a stinking lego train...Collectors!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

It could be worse

I'm certainly not ready to change places with any of the poor folks in Haiti today. Just the same it was a frustrating day. Sadie was sick and missed school. I stayed home with her in the afternoon.
In the morning I went to see what more needed to be done with the Ford 460 v-8. It is now a $3,000 pickup instead of a $1,000 pickup. What more is there to say?
Then we looked up the torque settings for the manifold bolts and the flywheel bolts. There was a little mix up on those values and we broke off a bolt holding down the clutch to the flywheel. Then there was a mix up on eating lunch. Then I decided to solder a wire onto the terminal on my GPS receiver that provides a radar out sort of signal to run the calc-an-acre. I was doing this at the house as I was instructed to actually stay with Sadie instead of wandering off and working. Well, I managed to drop a dollop of solder onto the circuit board. I think I got it off and perhaps it will continue working. I looked up a replacement GPS on ebay. The only thing that came close to what I have was at $800. Will probably not do that this year.  Sadie and I played legos for a bit. Then i worked on pulling the molding off in the laundry room. Then we played driving games on the Wii. Then i went to sleep while she demonstrated the My Little Pet Shop game. Then Wife appeared. She fixed me supper and I went off to work on the international truck. I drilled out the broken bolt in the flywheel wrong. I got the drill bit just a little off center and I went up to a little bit larger drill bit on than I should of. I got advice from a friend and then just drilled the bolt hole out to 5/16 and tapped it with a 3/8 NC tap. It kind of cleaned out the threads. I found some sleeve and bearing retainer type green loc-tite and smeared that on the threads and then carefully installed a new bolt. Who knows....
Perhaps tomorrow I can get the engine installed...

Animals in the house

People who have pets in the house are dirty. I'm in the house as Sadie is not feeling well. My lovely and gracious wife is redoing the laundry room. I get a lot of dirt on the floor. She moved the litter box. This annoys the cat.
So the cat shat on the floor.
He walk into the living room. Right in front of Sadie, and he dropped a load. I frankly do not give a rusty rats bottom about the cat's emotional issues. I put him out into the rain. He crapped on the carpet! Add this to cat hair everywhere. You find it in the computer keyboard, in computer cooling fan. He yowls when he is hungry, he yowls when he is happy, he pisses on my stuff if the dog spends the night in the laundry room when it is freezing outside.
I actually like the cat. He is a big grumpy fellow who is like 14 years old.
Just the same, he is a cat. He should live outside or in a barn or in someone else's house.

It never stops raining...

I need to spread slug bait. The little slugs that invaded us from produce brought in from other countries-are at work. They are eating all of the camelina that we no-tilled as a test. You can't spread slugbait in the rain. It is hard to watch it all go away in front of your eyes.
I also have more problems with my pickup repair, they didn't give us all the gaskets for the International truck engine. The engine quit on the powerbin which holds my feed grain. I knocked the hammermill over and bent the cyclone badly and so on.
Just how it goes...

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Nelson Mandela is a Saint according to Charlie Rose and Morgan Freeman so it is true!

I saw Morgan Freeman on Charlie Rose talking about his latest role as Nelson Mandella. Charlie Rose had a look of orgastic delight on his face. The idea of making Nelson Mandella into a saint is a foundation point of white liberalism. Nelson Mandella is the very defininition of the Undeniable Virtue of the Oppressed. He certainly has done a very good job of leading South Africa into a brave new future. No crime there. No body killing anybody there. Just peace and love and all those rock stars!
It was an act of humanity to start killing white farmers and taking their land. Oh, but it was not him. That only happened next door in Zimbabwe  It was a very saintly act to give that land to his friends and supporters. Yes it has certainly not plunged formerly prosperous parts of Africa in poverty and famine. Those white people were rotten fellows and needed to be tortured anyway. What a wonderful world we live in.
Freedom fighters are always such wonderful people. They never put burning tires around the necks of those who oppose them. 
I'm sure the whole world cup soccer deal in South Africa will turn out really well... No crime there, no body being killed.
What this world needs is more insight from U-2 and the We are The World foundation.
This is why many people oppose gun control...
After writing this I suppose now will turn me down as an applicant to be part of their link program for selling books and music I mention in the blog. Oh well...
I did find a post on Wikipedia about the farmer genocide in South Africa. I am amazed it is even mentioned. Of course it is down played. The motive is robbery or the farmers were mean to their employees. Yup, life is much better in South Africa now! Thanks Mr. Mandela, Jimmy Carter, and Bono. We are the world, we are the children, blah, blah, blah, blah.

The Great Engine Swap of 2010

This project seems to never end.
I found a new truck as you may have read before. We cleaned the engine and then pulled that same engine. I have to replace the exhaust gaskets and clutch. See photo below. New helper seems to be a happy sort of fellow...

With the engine removed it is time to fix various parts on the engine that would be hard to get at if the engine were installed. The exhaust manifold is one of those projects. Due to the clever design of the heads the top exhaust manifold bolts are almost impossible to remove. They go through the manifold into a flange on the head. The back of the flange is open and so moisture can get into the threads and rust the bolts to the head. It requires a combination of heat and oil and more heat and careful application of a wrench.

I did have a plan. Friday afternoon I heated the flanges on the head red hot. I let them cool. The bolts did not break loose. I applied lots of penetrating oil. Then Friday night I heated the manifold bolts red hot. I heated just the head. I tried to make sure the heat flowed through the whole bolt. I looked for a faint glow from the little bit of bolt I could see from the back of the manifold flange.
Saturday morning I came back.
First I mixed up a special brew of automatic transmission fluid and acetone. This is supposed to penetrate better than commercial penetrating oil. I never really got to find out. My brother came over to look at the clutch. As soon as vehicles started arriving at the shop the neighbor who owns the shop came out to see what was up. He wanted to get involved.
The bottom bolts came out right away. They were into blind holes so there was little rust. The heating the head idea worked perfectly. The bolts expand from the heat and then contract which breaks them loose.
My plan was to apply the special oil and then let the engine set while I worked on my feed grinding project at home. But, everyone wanted to work on the engine. This was driving me crazy as I had a plan. However, my phone kept ringing and so I was distracted. The neighbor got the torch and air wrench and everything going and soon got the bolts out. All of them but the one I broke off earlier.

This was ok. He felt like he had really done something. I said thank you very much. In all the pain and suffering of this whole project. The only part I felt I really know how to do was remove the rusted bolts. Oh well. I did get to do the broken one. I heated it several times. I put special oil on it. I even got it loose enough to move back and forth. I was going to use a die grinder to grind off the back of the bolt but I didn't have one. I ended up drilling out the bolt with a reverse drill bit. I drilled it out almost to the threads before I could turn it out. It was strange that it was that hard to do as I did have it loose in the threads.

This photo is out of order but I don't have time to put it at the front of the post. You can see the bolt I broke off right away. It is the empty front hole. You can see the other two bolts. Note that the heads are different colored. I applied heat only to the bolt head. Usually this transfers the heat all the way through the bolt. These were stuck really tight!
Today I will work on the clutch. Or solder a new wire onto my GPS receiver, or grind feed, or putz around and pretend to be busy!

Monday, January 11, 2010

What happened to John Barleycorn?

I was reading about Rip Van Winkle. Thought perhaps he was related to Ed Winkle but Ed has way too much energy. I discovered that Old Rip Van Winkle is a premium bourbon which is made from corn, wheat, barley instead of corn, rye, and barley. They say this gives a smoother flavor and ages better.
And it would appear that all the old distilleries are gone. If you have a taste for copper kettle brewed old Crow you are out of luck as the distillery closed down 30 years ago...
So, should you have a taste for 30 year-old bourbon you are most likely still drinking the real stuff, brewed in distilleries that could date back to the War of Northern Aggression. The 20-year old stuff probably came from a modern facility with lots of stainless steel, OSHA approved hand rails and none of the dead rats and bird poop and rust and what ever nasty stuff made the old whiskey so good.
It would appear that Jack Daniel's owns the remaining distilleries but my attention span is short and I guess you can type word in the Google search engine just as well as I can...
In a side note, there are small distilleries that have been started in recent years. I suppose a craft industry for whiskey has started up with the loss of the legendary old distilleries. I planted for a local fellow who has built a distillery on his little 40 acre farm. He keeps it kind of quiet. It is legal and everything, but I couldn't get a tour the last time I was there.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Keystone Kops To The Rescue!

The insanity continues.
There was an incident at our big city airport where a passenger refused to store his bags and the stew freaked out. So they scrambled five jets and escorted the plane back and did not charge the guy-yet.
I found a quote from this article at CBS news:
"by ToolMangler1 January 6, 2010 11:00 PM EST
because his egocentric stupidity caused two F15s to scramble (Full afterburner) to the Airliners position, Diverted the flight and had to reimburse the Passengers for their time and troubles.  Somebody has to pay for that. (do you volunteer?)"

So should the public be mad at the guy who wouldn't stow his bags or mad at they system that turns a customer service issue into a multimillion dollar fiasco but still lets mad bombers fly with no questions asked....

And this Just in off the Google Search: Plane diverted to Portland after sex maniacs argue with Stewardess! It would seem that a couple from Seattle wanted to get it on in the plane bathroom which I guess you just can't do in this day of mad underpants bombers. Of course, it is totally not allowed to argue with a Stewardess or a TSA employee so back went the plane. It will probably be counted on some sort of success story for the brave defenders of the USA. Along with all those pocket knives and nail files and little bottles of shampoo that they have been taking away from people.
They have not found any exploding underpants yet, well at least not soon enough to matter...
Edit: That story was from November 2007. It showed up with the search for the most recent fiasco. Internet searches can turn up anything! But, I don't have to be relevant as I am not a real news source for anyone!!!!

Just Say No To Full Body Scans | The Indentured Servant Girl

Just Say No To Full Body Scans | The Indentured Servant Girl

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Now I can add lazy to uncultured

Wife and daughter have vanished. That would be due to the fact that is is 8 a.m.!!!
My wife gets up really early. I tend to stay up late. Sadie likes to crawl in bed with Mom and I put her own bed when I go to bed. We have been reading at night when usually means that I fall asleep reading her a story and wake up at 11 and go to my bed...
I didn't sleep real well last night. Tossing and turning and so on. I was going to get up early  but I thought I'd just lay there for a second and think about what I'm doing today.
I woke up to a silent house. I jumped out of bed and rushed to find a clock. My wife collects old clocks but none of them are plugged in. The running ones may or may not have the correct time. The one in the kitchen read 8 a.m. My helper should arrive anytime. Unless he has quit me because I called him a philistine.
My dad has never slept in till 8 a.m. in his life. Not even when he was sick. At 90 years of age he is in his office every day at 7:30.
I'm not sure why-but he is... I guess that is good for something.
I do not want to work on that truck. I want to work on something fun, like a baler, or my tractor, or build something interesting for my feed mill or grain drill. Art for art's sake is much more fun that doing it cause you have to.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

I'm an uncultured lout

It is Wednesday evening and I am filthy and tired and I know I am not a mechanic.
I called my employee a Philistine yesterday. I like to use big words. Perhaps I should apologize. Sure it was in jest and it did sound better than, "you uncultured lout," but it really was somewhat rude to put someone down for not being as well read as you think they should be.
Speaking of Philistines, do you know what kind of car they drove? Well, of course that was a Studebaker-it says in the Bible that they sent forth a Champion. I suppose none of you really got that joke as Studebaker has not been sending forth Champions for like, what, 40 years....?
But I digress.
We were working on the International truck. I found a truck with a good engine to put into my truck with the bad engine. We were able to start it and drive it home. The license had expired in 1999 and it may not have run for a year or so before that. I did not buy a trip permit, screw you State of Oregon...
So, we started her up and off I drove down Highway 18. There was much clanking and banging from the drive train but I was grabbin' gears and just kept the peddle down. I was afraid if I stopped I would be stranded on the side of Highway 18 with no trip permit and my service truck license expired last month and I forgot to renew that as well.
The truck has a five and three speed and I really didn't want to slow down anyway as I couldn't remember exactly what gear pattern I shifted to get up to 45 mph and I sure was not going to try to shift down. A gear-jammer I am not.
About the time I got the brownie in high and the main box in fourth there was a terrific bang followed by a horrible clatter and rattle from somewhere in the transmission area. The bang had to have been a back-fire when I let off the gas to shift as the exhaust gaskets were shot.
I slowed down a bit and the noise lessoned.
I turned off onto Amity-Bellview highway and found things were quieter at 40 instead of 50. The shaking and shimming slowed greatly as the tires warmed and the flat spots relaxed from their decade of solitary reflection.
At the first turn there was a huge clatter and suddenly the engine became quite louder. I peered through the moss obscuring the rearview mirror to see one of the muffler bouncing off into the ditch.
The horrible clunking noise was now gone and I decided to see what this old girl would do. I got her up to 55 mph but then the power steering kind of stuck and I decided perhaps a little slow speed was in order. After all, a gear-jammer I am not....

We have been tearing the truck apart to get at the engine. This is a very heavy old truck. It is quite stouter than my International with the 24 foot bed. It has a strange suspension setup for the cab. This makes it really hard to work on. I should just use a torch.
As my helper and I were working we were discussing literature. He is more of a film buff. I am more of a literature person. As sometimes happens we got on the subject of his girl friend. She plays the violin so I assume she is totally cultured and perhaps even an intellectual. I figure violin players are pretty highbrow sorts who sip tea with their little fingers extended. After learning that she played in a string quartet I admit to being a bit nervous when I talk to her. I  worry that I will inadvertently pass gas or express an admiration for banjo players or say "you-all." Actually, I've only talked to her twice-but I did think about all this the second time I talked to her.
And so it came about that I made some crack about the huntsman in Lady Chatterley's Lover. Be he had not read D.H. Lawrence or F. Scott Fitzgerald or any of the short list of authors which I thought every high school student had been forced to read. I suggested he ask his sophisticated girlfriend based on the memory that back in my day, it seemed that every self respecting violin paying intellectual college girl (of which I really only remember two) had ready Lady Chatterley's Lover-or at least the naughty parts.
And I called him a philistine.
She had not read the book.
I inquired more about his education, he is 26, and I guess kids just don't read anymore and they learn absolutely nothing in school... I guess you do not have to read D.H. Lawrence to find naughty stories when you can look at porn on the internet. Oh well.
Then I realized that I remembered nothing about the book. Other than the Huntsman seemed to be determined to do things which, when I deciphered the highbrow porn terms, could not have been very hygienic back in the days before daily baths and Charmin. The book that was more shall we say, "disturbing" was "Sons and Lovers" by the same author. That book explored more of the real-life sorts of tortured relationships that put lots of money into the pockets of modern day therapists.
So I suppose the real Philistine is myself. Who as a high school student opened the legendary high brow book of naughtiness and laughed. Laughed at D.H. Lawrence, and then used knowledge of the book to attempt to impress young Co-eds (with mixed results).
So, I suppose I could apologize. I figure young folks have pretty short attention spans these days so I think I'll let that one go...

I will never make it to age 91

I sold two truckloads of straw today. I sold them too cheap. I did not actually collect the money. But they are gone. I talked the truck driver into driving the squeeze to load the trucks as the straw is stored in old sheds where they used to raise turkeys and it is really hard to get in and out-without taking out a truss or a post.
The squeeze picks up a block of straw that is seven layers high. Each layer is made up of two rows of bales. Each row has four bales. Or you could say, 4 rows that are two wide. There are three tie layers which are too difficult for me to describe. The stacks are made with a NH 1085 balewagon which uses a computer to make the stacks. If it makes the stack wrong, calling it a bad name or hitting it really hard seems to help. Although it may do it again just out of spite.
But, that has nothing to to with the title of my post.
My post has to do with my lunch of which I did not take a photo.
I first microwaved a can of Chili. Specifically Nalley's old fashioned brand. We used to grow cucumbers for them years ago so I maintain a certain loyalty.
Then I found some bacon in the refrigerator. I started cooking a couple slices. Then I added a couple more, then I remembered the deer sausage, so I tossed in a couple of those. I poured off the bacon grease onto some dry dogfood for Stanley. That made him very very happy. I know that because he wagged his tale so hard it knocked over a bucket on the porch.
Next I cut up a couple strips of bacon into the chili. That was quite good. I also ate the deer sausage-but separately. Then I found a couple hard boiled eggs. They went better with the deer sausage.
I did have some bacon left when I got done. It looked lonely sitting on the paper plate and I hated to put it into the refrigerator-so I ate that as well. Then I had two three cups of coffee.
I had no vegetable. I am sure I will die at an early age.
I am now looking for a box of Ho-Ho's. I am sure Sadie has something good stashed away somewhere!

This is the squeeze. The clamp is raise up so the trucker can get up on the load to tie it.

These are the finished loads, on the way out the driveway.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Why William Tell has been disproved and How I explained the Undeniable Virtue of the Oppressed to an 8 year old

Sadie was having a hard time getting to sleep. She wanted to crawl in bed with Mom but that did not work out. So it was suggested that Dad read her a story. I was already looking at the pictures in Emil and The Detectives and so we took that to bed. It is the 1941 hard cover printing and it has all the pictures and the forward and the description of the German words and the names of the characters and I started out reading that.
Well, we came to the term "darkie." I stopped my reading to tell her not to call Negros darkies and then I realized that was the wrong term and I said black people and then I said well you just don't use a person's skin color to describe them as a person. So then she asked why and I said that from time to time those folks who know more than us decide that what we are calling another nationality is disrespectful and they change the name. Then we have to learn new names and some of us get confused and call them by the wrong names and feel silly, but people can call white people any name they want.
So she asked, "why is that."
And I said it is because of the Undeniable Virtue of the Oppressed.
And she said what is that. So I launched into a discussion of classim and blah, blah, blah and from the bedroom a somewhat annoyed voice says, "you know that kid with ADD that is really just a little brat but he gets away with everything cause he needs medication. That is what it is..."
And I said, "You are listening to us?"
And she said, "I hear everything you guys talk about..."
So Sadie seems to understand. I did point out that as a girl she could use this concept to her advantage but she wanted to hear who William Tell was.
So I looked him up on the internet and who would have thought. They have now proved he didn't exist.
I kind of wondered what they had against the man and the legend until I read that William Tell is a powerful symbol of Swedish individualism, culture, and nationalism. Now these are unacceptable terms in the Orwellian 21st century so of course the legend of William Tell must be marginalized.

"He was the amulet to which they clung through the second World War, and the man who gave meaning to their decision to spurn the EU and the UN. And the more stridently the Swiss emphasised their difference and independence from the rest of the world, personified by the man with the bow, the easier it was to gloss over the glaring differences within..."

And then I realized why Richard Dockens and company work so hard to marginalize Christianity. The truth or falsehood of the religion means nothing. The existence of God does not matter, rather it is that Christianity as a means to control the population is no longer popular with the clever folks who know more than us.

Organized Atheism and modern Science in a nutshell....

Will my daughter will grow up to be your typical moron? I suppose

S. didn't do her reading at Christmas break. So tonight she had to quit playing her Wii to go and read. She is reading Harry Potter. Of course she got Harry Potter for Christmas.
I tried to get her to read Emil and the Detectives. At one point she had started the Narnia series but lost A Horse and His Boy. She might as well read Harry Potter as she will only get a couple chapters done and then she will start something else. Harry Potter seems to be that sort of book for short attention spans.
But, fortunately there are videos to watch. Perhaps she can watch High School musical for the 100th time or perhaps another classic like the Parent Trap remake with Lindsey Lohan. Good role model there. Or perhaps the horrible animation of The Barbie Diaries.
We did read The Lion's Paw at one point. She really enjoyed that book. I'm going to have to push the reading a little more. I told her I was not reading her Harry Potter. I'm not opposed to the magic and opposed to the hype. And I am sure it has no social redeeming value as it was written after 1960. Nothing of any redeeming social value has been written or sung or filmed after 1960.
Were it up to me the TV would meet a 7.62x39mm commie hollow point or perhaps just a trip to GoodWill. I would give up the internet for the quiet that comes from no stinking TV droning on and on filling empty heads with mindless noise.
Well, perhaps it would be hard now with a whopping 15 subscribers.
I'm going to go read a stinking book...
Good night!
My own daughter reading $%^&*ing Harry %^&*&^%$R$RE@Q# Potter. Perhaps next she can go watch Grease, there's a good kids film! Oh, and then Rock and Roll High School! Yes!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

The first Sunday of the Nude Year

Yesterday I went to the funeral of my friends mother. She was a very nice devout Christian lady. My people were there. I met up with some people I have not really seen for years.
It was a nice Memorial service. The preacher preached the power of God and the way to salvation. They sang "Blessed Assurance," and this other song which I remember from my childhood that goes something along these lines, "let us pray for each other, not faint by the way, in this sad world of toil and care, for that home is so bright and it's almost in sight and I know in my heart you'll go there."
I understand the social significance all of this. I understand how this all makes us focus on God and not on ourselves, how it gives us hope for the future and how the deep emotions of this kind of a cultural event bring us back into line with our traditions and our cultural belief system. I understand how it all works.
I don't feel as sad as I do uptight and anxious. I don't even know how to say or explain it in words. I am just very very uptight...
I went up to my friend and I really had nothing to say. I shook his hand and we exchanged the sorts of pleasantries that are fitting for such an event. I stood there for a while. He stood there. Finally I said, "look, I've got nothing to say really. I'm just standing here to be supportive. If you have someone to talk to or get in line for food it is ok."
He said, "That's ok, I've got nothing to say either. Thanks."
And we just stood there and didn't say much for 10 minutes or so. It kind of looked like we were talking I guess. People kind of flowed by. It was kind of nice.
I ran into another friend. We were all at a little Bible School in Ohio together. I haven't really talked to this fellow since 1984 or so. He said we got into a lot of trouble together.
I said I was feeling a bit tense with all the folks around and kind of tended to keep to myself in these situations. He said I was once a very outgoing, friendly, and kind of crazy person. I don't even know, doesn't really sound like me at his point in time. I said I was overcompensating. He laughed and started telling his wife and kid the trouble we almost got into. We really never got caught at anything. Kind of funny. More depressing than funny. I didn't think I did what he said I did but I just smiled and nodded.
My tenseness has carried over through today.
That evening my wife and I went out for dinner with some friends. A and M are our age. A was a friend of my wife in college. I've always like A and her husband M is a nice fellow as well. They may in fact read this as my lovely wife has been emailing people links to this site instead of the Scribd repository of the DS. If so I would like to note that if I seemed a bit on edge-well I was, but it was nothing personal...
We went to a newer restaurant in Newberg. I can't for the life of me remember the name of it. There were few customers and we talked loudly. We did not swear or tell dirty jokes, but the rest of the customers soon left. Perhaps they were done eating. M and I ordered steaks. He had the Texas rib eye-I think, and I had the New York 8 oz. M pointed out that they did offer a smash potatoe in the menu. I have never had the pleasure to dine on a drunken tuber but I did resist the urge to order it-instead I had a baked potatoe with all the trimmings. It was a very good meal. I ordered the steak medium well and that is how I got it. When i stabbed it with my fork it did not bellow nor did my fork bounce of the seared flesh and bounce onto the floor. It was tender and tasty and just the way I like it. Best of all it was somewhere in the $10-12 price range. It is pretty much impossible to find a good $12 steak in this day and age.
Afterwards we ambled down the street looking for place for dessert. We ended up in front of Jimmy G's which is no longer Jimmy G's. It now serves booze and featured a barmaid showing lots of tattoo's and skin. Fortunately for M and I she was no Saint Pauli Girl so the urge to ogle was more akin to waiting for the train wreck than anything else.
We shot a few games of pool at which I was terrible. At this point my brain was trying to bore a whole through my right temple, probably to escape the pounding 80's rock music which did little to suppress my tenseness.
I woke up tense as well.
There was a discussion of Church and we started to get ready. Somehow that degenerated into another discussion and we stayed home. I took a nap.
I woke up still uptight.
We delivered a thank you for Sadie's Christmas present, and a rent check for storage of our remaining stuff that is in the barn at our old house, to our former landlord. They always give S. a present for Christmas. His wife is not able to get around much so we stayed and talked for a while. He showed me several interesting guns and a sword used by a Japanese war criminal to kill himself. I have to look that one up on the internet. Landlords friend was an MP and kept the sword.
I was a little less uptight.
Wife and S. went to see wife's sister in Salem. I am laying on the couch.
I am a little less uptight.
I find it depressing that I am unable to be of the same moral character of my parents.
Oh well...
Ed W. emailed me a link to NewAgTalk. I think he wanted me to defend the faith by responding to this Athiestic fellow. Instead I responded to this poster. I felt more qualified in this area today... So I thought I would make a really long post to The Lazy Farmer and listen to some music and retreat to my "Bubble" as I have heard it phrased. People will believe what they want to believe.
Here's a link to follow, Waylon didn't write this song and they don't play this sort of stuff on the radio no more...
Three Fingers Whiskey Pleasures the Drinker
Moving does more than the drinking for me
Willy, he tells me that doers and thinkers
Say movin's the closest thing to being free
Other folks call it escapism, avoiding responsibility..

Tomorrow is back to the real world.

I feel much more relaxed this evening.. Thanks Uncle Rod! Beats one of those lottery tickets!

Saturday, January 2, 2010

It was a dark and stormy Morning...

It is the second day of the New Year.
I was reading some creepy science fiction short stories online. I not really sure where they were. I tried to find the site but all I got was which has naughty stories. I think the whole world has turned to porn. At first it was funny and naughty. It was fun to type in a random web search and see what sort of strange porn sight would appear.
Now it is just annoying.
Try to look up "amateur radio," good grief. All I want to do is find new scanner frequencies, I don't want to see ugly people having sex.
So, I can't find my story site, I read it late at night. It was creepy, about evil forces infiltrating the minds of adults and only the children could see the truth. I am using FireFox which dumps my history after every session so I can't find where I have been anyway. I tend to drift from one site to another and I was looking at blogs so I suppose I could get there again. I am pretty sure it was on a science fiction blogsite.
So, I had these creepy dreams about people chasing me and evil forces lurking around in the bushes.
I don't know why I even started reading the stupid stuff. I wanted to read this book I got for Christmas called "Deeply Rooted" by Lisa M. Hamilton.
It is about smaller farmers and I'm sure everything is going to go to heck for them and I will be more depressed than when I started.
I can see out the sliding glass door from my easy chair. It is nasty out. There is an inch of water on the lawn. I have a fellow coming after hay this morning. I have to go to a funeral this afternoon. I do not want to go to the funeral.
Then I looked at my blog reading list and saw that there is some freaky science fiction stuff on the Aspirations blog. Thanks a lot, now I will spend the day all creeped out. I think I will go listen to the Bailes Brothers, this will clear my head!!!
I looked up my post from last year at this time. There was snow on the ground. I was also kind of depressed.
The question is, have I moved forward or fallen backwards. Not so sure at this point.

Edit: Ok, if you follow me you probably realize I subscribe to the write and forget school of writing. Only not quite. I think about it and then I come back and sign on again and change something. So here it is.
1. Aspirations weblog, I didn't mean to say it was creepy or bad or anything. I'm saying I read some strange SiFi and then ate a bunch of ham and pickles and random stuff out of the fridge really late at night and had dreams about shadowy figures trying to take over everyone's mind, so then I read her blog and she was writing about the same thing.
2. Some while back I found a story repository online that was not porn. I thought it was stories online but I guess not. I did a search for online stories and discovered a lot of disturbing stuff.
3. I have had too much coffee and I'm getting jittery and even more random and now it is coffee time at the farm and my head is going to explode....aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
4. I don't want to go to funerals not because I don't like the lady who passed away. I do like her and her son is a good friend of mine. I just don't like funerals...

Friday, January 1, 2010

A song for the Nude Year-er New Year!

Perhaps 2010 won't be such a crappy year after all. I have actually accomplished two difficult tasks this morning. I am soaking wet and slightly annoyed but yet strangely optimistic.

I made up a song about it.
Sung to the tune of "I shot the sheriff"

I started the Studebaker
It was not all that e-a-sy!

I started the Studebaker
It took me five cups of cof-f-ee!

I started the Studebaker
and then I moved the Vista off the river-bottom

I started the Studebaker
And now I am positively giddy!

What a way to start the New Year-as personal triumph and a song. If only I had a banjo...
Ooooh! I should also start the Triumph!

What I did was fix the flat tire on the Studebaker Cruiser and charge the battery. I sprayed a little starting fluid in the intake and she fired right off. I even had a sound track. I did a big no-no and left my Tom Petty cassette in the tape deck. IT started right up with, "Sometimes this world just seems a little hopeless..." I do not dare to ruin this fantastic radio shack stereo as you cannot buy dual shaft radios that will fit in the dash of old cars. Plus this one has a input jack for my ipod!
The flat tyre was also a problem. I found a tyre repair kit which is the kind you stab a patch into the tyre. Fortune was with me and the tires were only like 2 ply cheapos so it was not so hard to stab the patch through the steel belts.

 I didn't actually drive the car as I got distracted.
I was thinking about tires and I realized the our 1967 Minneapolis-Moline G1000 Vista that once belonged to John Fogerty (or his brother or cousin or something, according to the auctioneer-course they will say anything...) was still setting in the clover field with a flat tire. I had about 100 ft of airhose on the reel in my pickup so I strung it out to the tractor and waited for an hour.

The tire is so bad the side walls are shredded. I had to keep moving the tractor to keep the tire from leaking. I barely made it up the hill into the pasture before it was clear flat. I turned the tractor so the tire guy could get to it. I love that tractor, I wish I could restore it.

I am waiting for my friend from High School to call me. He is visiting for the holidays. He called and said he would come visit me. I suggested lunch at the Amity Cafe. This will not happen as I started to add up the time from where he was when he called to what he needs to do and the other people he needs to see and where he planned on going tonight. It is nice to have goals and it made me feel pretty darn swell that he called me. Perhaps I will drive the Studebaker in to have lunch. The tags are pretty much expired but perhaps I can get off with a warning if caught. If is a 1964 Studebaker. Obviously I don't drive it much and I have proof of insurance as I forget to de-insure it.
I do have to be careful about driving it as the green idiots that run this state have mandated alcohol in the gas. Alcohol in the bloodstream is fine. Of course in this advanced modern world they have got it all turned around. Alcohol in the bloodstream is now considered bad but alcohol in the gas is GOOD! Go figure...

Edit: 12 people have viewed this blog since this morning. But-does anyone comment? Look, you can say something rude if you want, I don't care. Just my luck, I find the 12 lazy farmers left in this country and they follow me. You could at least click the offensive button. My easily offended follower seems to have given up on his little hobby...

2010 whoop! whoop!

I have no resolutions.
I have no funny stories this morning...
There were a lot of explosions last night.
I went to bed early. I have not missed a New Years in recent memory. My wife and I were going to babysit for her niece. My wife thought I needed to sleep and so left without me. I wrote stories on the computer  fairly late into the evening and then I threw them all away.
This morning it is raining and cold.
The duck hunters arrived shortly before dawn. They are merrily blasting away this morning. It is kind of a funny thing. I think the game regulation say you can't have more than three rounds in your gun. There is never a single shot however. One guy has an auto cause you can hear bang! bang! bang! as fast as he can pull the trigger-which is pretty fast by the way! So this is how it goes. Donald the Duck is flapping around looking for a morning snack. He sees one of the putt-putt duck decoys swimming around in the pond. He goes in for a closer look. This sparks a whole outcry of duck calls. It he is somehow confused by all the ducks yelling at him and turns in for his final approach. He is of course, met with a hail of gunfire. There is always two quick shots together, followed by one more, then two more together. I think there must be two guys shooting. The one guy is semi-auto and the other has a pump. Trigger happy boy shoots first with the auto and then Elmer Fudd joins in with the pump for two shots to Trigger boy's three. Oh wait! There was just two from the auto so I guess machine gun pete is on his own! Perhaps I will take out my old Lakeside side by side and blast some paint cans. Pant cans deserve to die! They are non-native species.
The day it snowed six inches the cousins had a nice sled run down the hill behind the house. Of course this lasted until the duck hunters drove down the road and ruined it. They certainly could not miss a day of shooting. Who knows what goes on down there in the duck ponds. Perhaps they will all go together and buy us a load of rock for the road they have ruined?
The Chief duckster has a new tractor. It is an 8N ford with an industrial loader and a blade. He graded the road. This consisted of dragging all the mud out of the ditch onto the road. Then, making drains for the ditches. The drains were dug through the access crossings into our fields. The access points to the fields were chosen because they are slightly uphill from the rest of the field. You have to dig down two feet to get the water to drain. He dug down a foot with the tractor bucket and deposited the dirt on the field side of the ditch. So now we have what is called a mess. He will expect us to be quite happy with his efforts.
This would also go for dragging the mud out of the ditches. True there is a lot of gravel in the mud and if you do drag this mud up onto the road it will pack down and raise the road. Unless you drive on it all winter. Then it becomes mush. He was unable to dam up half the grass field for sheet water this year as he is want to do. This is because last summer I took my little Eversman boxscraper and hauled about 8 loads out of the field and into my yard. It will take a cat to build that dike up again.
Of course the grass that we planted in the field is dead. Didn't make it through the summer.
I have no bitterness...
Perhaps I'll go get my new free truck. I can annoy folks on Highway 18 and I can bring more crap home to park in front of our farm! Wonder if it will make it all the way home.
2010 will be a banner year!!!

For future reference: This blog has been viewed 15,550 times in the last year and currently has 14 followers. If you discount the number of times I looked at it just to see if anyone else had looked that would be say 8,000 views. IF each of those folks would give me $1500 then I would  have made 1.2 million this year. Or is that $150? Hmm, public school education to blame once again. Heck, if each of those folks gave me $.05 I could probably buy lunch. Or perhaps just a kind word and a pat on the head. I would really feel like 1.2 million dollars. Oh my! I feel happy already!

An interesting story can be found here. The government tells you to do it and you do it and well... sometimes you can look back and sometimes you meet one of the others...

And someone-an ethnic Albanian (hmm what does that mean? Another one of those Dangerous White Christians who blow up abortion clinics almost everyday?)  shot some people in Finland. This is because Finland has less intrusive gun laws than the rest of Oceania or Eurasia or what country is it now... Oh right the EU.
Naturally there will be gun violence REPORTED around the world from Finland until they outlaw gun ownership and then there will be no gun violence reported at all. Most likely there will be mysterious lone gunman shootings happening until there is gun control legislation. This is a common tactic used to pass gun control legislation. The crazed gangs shooting at each other and everyone else with machine guns that will follow this legislation will be downplayed or used to bring in more restrictive legislation.
I see no conspiracy. I just noticed the pattern...

Oh, and this is really funny. This is why I liked George Bush the first time around. To bad he was "owned" I think he would have been a much better president left to his own devices...or at least more entertaining...
"In his parting words to British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and French President Nicolas Sarkozy at his final G-8 Summit, Bush managed to outdo himiself. "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter," he said, punching the air and grinning widely as the two leaders looked on in shock."
I think the above link is where I first read this. It is a funny site. There is a good photo to go with this story!

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