The Useful Duck!

Contribute to my Vacation, please...

Sunday, October 15, 2017

Should this ever happen to you

Do NOT rip off the remaining nail with your teeth.
Suffering will follow...
For at least a week...

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

A 100 year old spider lily

It resides in the library at my college.
It has bloomed twice under my care.
Of course the Ficus tree did lose all its leaves onto the carpet.

Thursday, September 21, 2017

Why we can't have nice things

I was driving the tractor down the hill on our farm to get my grain drill when I saw a tail pipe in the road. People had been driving around it.
Me, not being the sort of person to poop and then sit back down in it, stopped the tractor to move the broken exhaust pipe.
I then realized it was from my pickup.
Now I could have lost it last night when I went to look at the drill but I should have heard it. But it makes it more pathetic if people drove around it all day and didn't move it.
At least they didn't run over it.

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Some photos and my birthday

Happy birthday to me...
Several people have complemented me on the outstanding job I have done on the soccer field. My supervisor is the one who insisted on overwatering it and that is why it is green during the driest summer in years.
I am the one who drives straight and who has not sprayed out the fence rows, cleaned the bark dust beds, or sprayed the weeds in the gravel parking lots.

I talked my brother into buying a combine. The diesel fuel injector pump promptly failed after two days of use. It sat for another three week. It has an odd pump. There are a million International DT-466 based engines and only a few of them have a not usually stocked injector pump.

I have 300 acres to plant and on the last field of straw the PTO catastrophically failed on my planter tractor and it is stranded in a field not that close to home. No hydraulics, no PTO, no brakes, no steering and a painful grinding noise. Hopefully it is just the coupler between the engine and PTO shaft. Whatever it is the minimum is one day to pull engine and three days to put it back in.

Yesterday I discovered the irrigation manager didn't turn off the irrigation on the practice field and golf green like I suggested Friday before the rain. The supervisor didn't tell him to do it. I turned it off  yesterday at quitting time. Today i didn't get stuck.

I was going to have a birthday party as Flying Pig Fiddle and Banjo is somewhere in Oregon and I have a work-study student that plays old time fiddle. I decided to just work on tractors instead. Probably for the best...

I made these barn door roller hinge things for my wife. She is building something.

My daughter found Isaac Asimov's "The Robots of Dawn" at a second hand book store and gave it to me for my birthday present. I can't read it as the print is too small.
My lovely and gracious wife got me some SK brand metric tubing wrenches. They are very nice.
Starbucks gave me a free cup of coffee. It was also nice. The barista gave me a smile and several kind words. I gave her a tip.
I suppose it was a good day...

Sunday, August 13, 2017

It rained! I ramble about groundskeeping, I complain about blogger, I attempt a link

It rained last night. I think I have all the straw picked up. Unless there is another field which I just thought of five minutes ago. It didn't really seem like there was enough baled for a full day of work...
Plus, I see I left 800lbs of pig feed and the mixer/grinder out in the rain. Plus, there is the bin of flax I knocked off the truck a month ago.
Whatever... I never claimed to be a good farmer.
Or a good groundskeeper.
My goal is to be the sort of cheerful ineffective lout that people just hate to get rid of... Already failed on the cheerful but think I've got the ineffective down.
I applied for a job at a different school. That was a mistake.
I get this idea that I should be the best I can be. This is a load of BS drilled into my by my early role models and three years in the Future Farmers of America organization.
The 21st century model of success should be to attain the maximum amount of compensation of the minimal amount of work.
I had a frustrating month at my job. My promotion has just given me way more responsibility and I am not as fast as the fellow who recommended me for this job. This is a two person (or one person who is really hyperactive) job. My workstudy student keeps having a conflict between he amount of alcohol he consumes and the balancing of blood sugars. He swears this is not true but he misses a lot of work. And then my supervisor tends to send me from one job to another.
Example: I saw the Athletic Director last week. Had a nice chat about upcoming events and what is getting done. I just give up remembering and tell him to make a list and give it to my boss. I point out that I have a lot to do and things get missed so a list would be great.
My supervisor gets an email that afternoon. It is 103 degrees F. He comes looking for me. I was off driving my workstudy helper though the sprinkler system in the Mule and wasn't watching my phone. I did not get caught.
However, we did a walk though problem areas. Two foot weeds were reported on the softball warning track. The weeds were not there. There were a few under the bleachers and the warning track was clean. People from work use the softball field so I keep it pretty clean. I didn't show him the not quite dead blackberries under the bleachers.
So... we were told to drop everything and weed the warning track. I pointed out that were sports fields that had to be mowed and that the track would have to wait.
The next day there were other issues.
My workstudy student didn't get the practice field completely mowed and I forgot to finish it the next day. There was a leaking sprinkler line at the edge of the field which I cut the time down on so that there would not be a swamp. I was told that if I didn't spend so much time talking to people in the morning when it was cool that I would get more work done. That may or may not be true but I just smiled and nodded.
Monday, I got the lecture again. So I filled out a time off request for two days. Tuesday, my workstudy student ran into the grandstands and broke the windshield out of the mule. The only object in 100 yards and he hit it. We cleaned up the mess but I got quite the lecture.
School policy is that students without licenses cannot drive golf carts even off the road. They can drive lawnmowers or their own bicycles (but not their cars) but not golf carts. I said I was training him.
Wednesday I applied at another school.
Friday the supervisor was not there.
After a brief discussion with fellow workers where they repeated things I told them when there were upset- it was pointed out to me that changing schools would probably just mean I had to work harder. I only get upset because I want to do a good job. The real reason to work is tuition, insurance, and retirement and it is a 15 minute drive from home.
Since then the absurdity of the whole thing has made me laugh. My supervisor came to grounds from cleaning services. He is learning about groundskeeping by watching YouTube videos. The same people that hired him as a transfer from cleaning services seem to expect him to do the job of a guy with a degree in Turf Management and manage a crew of oddball independent characters who are old enough to be his parents. Not sure I envy him...

My new phone is not very good for blogging. Google has made it hard to have two identities on the same phone. I can't post photos or videos like I could with my iPhone. The Blogger App is pretty much a waste. There are no good replacements.

Today I'm trying to lay down and keep ice on my leg. I seem to have pulled a muscle a month or so ago and it is starting to get annoying. I have a hard time getting in and out of the stacker or off of a lawnmower once I run it for a while. I have tried wrapping it but it is a bit awkward. I see kids wearing all sorts of clever sports type wrappings for sprains and injuries. I'm going to have to find someone in sports medicine to give me advice.

Now I'm going to try and post a video.

Sunday, July 30, 2017

I buy a new phone, go to a high school reunion, run out of money, and urchins steal my gator...

It is a Sunday morning and it is hot.
My family went camping.
I expect them back today.
I fixed myself eggs for breakfast. The eggs were fresh out of the chicken. I found some peppers in the garden and some mushrooms in the refrigerator. The mushrooms were in a brown paper bag. They were not growing in the refrigerator. My wife has not been gone that long.

I should have put fewer peppers in the eggs. I grew Hungarian Wax Peppers and Jalapeno's. The Hungarian wax pepper can be quite spicy. It is good for cooking and you can control the heat by the amount of seeds you keep. The flesh is mild and mine were a little sweet, more like a Bell Pepper than your usual fry your mouth ball-o-fire pepper.

I've been having a lot of phone problems. I've gone through five iPhone 6plus 16 gig. The iPhone six plus with 16 gigs is a junk phone. If someone gives it to you sell it. It will lock up and will randomly not receive texts, not send texts, send phone calls but not receive and received and not send. Plus, there seems to be a problems with certain Apple iCloud servers and you can't restore your piece of crap Asurion refurbished replacement phone.

I just got my replacement iPhone after the last failure and I could not restore the phone properly. I missed many important phone calls and texts. So I went to my local Verizon store where I got the car salesman treatment from a nice young man.
I was going to buy either an iPhone six 32 gig, an HTC, or a LG s6. The iPhone was too expensive for someone who continually breaks phones. They didn't have the HTC. So I got the LG.
My salesman said I could get $250 for my old phone from Verizon's buyback program. But, I had to do that at home. He also found me a $200 credit for switching to the LG. He did try to sell me a Motorola but the Motorola doesn't have a headphone jack. I don't want to deal with missing or dead bluetooth speakers in the middle of a Librovox recording fifteen miles from home and eight hours of boredom ahead of me.
But, I digress...
I bought the LG and paid double what I should have for a hard case and now I'm back to the other phone system. It is ok. I'm not thrilled but my phone doesn't really define my life. It is requiring some adjustment. I really just wanted my iPhone to work. I had finally got the iCloud BS to actually work. I liked the voice recognition for blogging. I was using BlogTouch Pro (which I really liked) for my phone.
I think the bottom line is that Apple is no longer longer an innovative company. The PC side seems to have learned a lot from the old days of Apple superiority and I can now tolerate them.

But you are all waiting to hear how I made the local scanner monitor page on Facebook.

The fellow who got my old JD Gator when I was "promoted" went on vacation. I fried the belt on my Mule climbing hills behind the college and it was in the shop. So I commandeered the Gator. Apparently his workstudy student was leaving the keys in the glove box and these two juvenile delinquents attempted to steal the gator. He also left so much crap in the gator it is hard to shift the darn thing and while the kids got it started and into reverse they were not able to get the shifter into the forward position because the mirror had fallen off the roof and was stashed on top of the shifter and prevented shifting into forward gear. So they reversed it into a big pile of grass and clippings couldn't get it into forward and then ran.
Security chased them in the little security SUV but nearly got stuck in the wildlife area. The kids escaped and I have been getting a lot of comments.
There is now a new edict that we have to chain up our steering wheels. I produced my keys to security so I was not in trouble. They like me as I laugh when they harass me and so I didn't get reported over the keys in the glovebox incident.

Last night I attended my 35th high school reunion. There were something like eight of us. Class size was around 47. I was not going to attend as I hated every moment of school. I was also a weird kid with odd religious beliefs, didn't do the pledge of allegiance, didn't go to dances, didn't go out drinking with everyone else, and people made fun of me a lot until eight grade when I became brutally sarcastic and somewhat of a cynic. Apparently I was well-liked in high school but the bitterness lingers on.
The fellow who was hosting the reunion at his winery told me if I didn't show up he or his wife would come and drag me out of the stacker. I was picking up bales just down the road.
I figure that was as good and invitation as any so I went.
Strangely enough, all the people there were people I liked and none of the people I disliked (in High School) were there. It was nice.
It is amazing how your early school experiences stick with you though life.
I had a nice talk with a couple people I hadn't seen since graduation and when the hosts heard I was on my own they loaded me with food to take home.

Next week it is supposed to hit 105 degrees. This is going to not be so fun.

Note: Blogger app on the phone is not letting me add photos. I foresee problems with the iPhone switch...

Friday, July 21, 2017

I am recovered and doing my usual mucking about...

I have recovered.
I am still having phone issues so I have no photos to share.
Today I went to sleep mowing and hit the fence. This was a bit hard on the reel mower. It is ironic that yesterday I got in trouble for letting my student run the reel mower. He was making perfectly straight lines and driving perfectly.
It was I who hit the fence...
Oh well, that is why God gave us welders...
My phone is a frustrating experience. I have an iPhone 6plus which has failed at least four times in the year I've had it.
I have Asurian insurance through Verizon. It is kind of an amazing scam, or at lest as I understand it.
Apple gives you a one year limited warranty but does not cover screens. However, they will sell you a new screen for around $150.
If you pay through the nose for Asurian they will give you a "reconditioned" phone for $150. Apple will not honor the one year replacement warranty on the Asurian replacement phone. Asurain gives you a phone that someone traded in because it was broken. So you get a crap phone for $150 which will probably fail and if you get stuck with a crappy model then you can't trade your way out of it.
I'm not sure there is any point in Asurain insurance on your phone. I think if I get a new phone I will try a SquareTrade warranty. I had it on a computer once I was very happy.
Today I intended to go pick up bales for my neighbors. They loaned us a baler when our engine failed.
However, my brother and I went to look at a combine instead and then I made some pig feed.
Making pig and chicken feed is not as much fun as it used to be when I didn't have a job.
I now have a good and rather large New Holland mixer-grinder. It pulls easy and holds 4,000lbs. It will also grind hay.
I liked making feed because I could trade it for beef and pork and it was a nice break from working on tractors in the cold. Grinding dusty grain when it is 80 degrees and almost dark is not as much fun as I had imagined. Plus, I think feed prices are down and I'm not getting the serious buyers I used to get.
Tomorrow I'm going to pick up bales. But, I am using my old iPhone 5 which does have enough memory to store books on tape. So it will be a long day.
Perhaps i can think of funny stories to blog about.

Sunday, July 9, 2017

A day off

I've been a bit busy.
Before I took on this job at the College I may have worked long hours but I usually had some sort of break to write the blog.
I have also been having frustrations with my iPhone and MacBook.
The iPhone 6s has died for the fourth time in a year and I'm back to the old iPhone 5. The small screen doesn't work for blogging.
I took the day off today.
Actually, I'm sick...
It is really frustrating as I have Muddy Valley's hay baled and it looks good. But it is now sitting there bleaching in the sun.
I went home at 8 p.m. last night. Decided after the second time I had to stop the stacker in the field and take a puke break that perhaps I should just go home. I was a little worried it would come out the other end next.
It seems like I spent most of the night puking my guts out and now every muscle in my body hurts like heck. Especially my back.
I'd try the hot tub but I still can't trust my farts.
I should have some adventures to post about but frankly I feel like crap and I'm going back to bed...
Perhaps I should just call in sick for tomorrow.
Soccer players should mow their own soccer field, with push mowers, it would build charactor...

Sunday, May 21, 2017

Random photos of my week

It was meant to be a picture story but the photos are out of order...
I'm going to church.

Subjects covered by photos. Warm weather, hay, late planting, bicycle trip to the coast, Russians and pacifiers.

You may assign captions at random




Saturday, May 13, 2017

White 2-135

I still need to redo the inside of the cab. Right now I'm more concerned about the digital tachometer not working.
The mounting bracket's are on the front pulley and I think I have to remove the radiator to change the sensor.
Or rather, I think it would be faster to remove the radiator to change or adjust the sensor.
It has gone from 135 hp  at the dry bar, to an estimated 200 engine horsepower. I would like to put it on the Dyno and actually see.
This is the 3rd White tractor/army truck engine conversion and I think each engine behaves differently. This tractor starts harder than the other tractors but I have not pulled it hard yet so I don't know how much power it actually has.
The 2-155 that I use for planting doesn't feel like it has this much horsepower as the ugly 2-155 I bought from Missouri.
All the engines were the same model.

Sunday, May 7, 2017

The past few weeks of which not much has happened but they have rapidly passed

Having a dumb job is different from not having a dumb job (in reference to a fellow blogger) and much different from being self-employed.
Much less stress when you discover that you don't really matter. I probably will not get a raise and I most likely will not get fired.
I always thought insanity was the ultimate escape but really it is Mediocrity. That way you can have hobbies. And still appreciate them. Waiting for the End of the World becomes just waiting for the end of the day. Tractors to paint, a Triumph to ride, a supervisor to gaslight. It's not a bad life...

This is a 90 year old Spider Lily plant in the library. I have not killed yet...

We are having "self-evaluations" this week at work.
This is idiotic.
The goal is a pitiful "merit" raise. It has been announced that there will be no "merit" raises because we have fewer students and have no money.
I took this job for three reasons, tuition for my daughter, insurance for my family, and retirement for me.
I did not take it to reach "self actualization."
The lady who sits across the table from me freaked out Friday when it was announced the evaluations were due. Apparently she had missed an entire weeks worth of complaining about the evaluations which happened every morning before work. 
She gave me a ride after I ran the diesel lawnmower out of diesel in the middle of the main street on campus Friday afternoon.
She was swearing up a storm about the evaluation. She wanted to know why she only had a day to do the evaluation and the rest of us had a week.
This was good as I had forgotten to turn my into the boss.
Well, actually I didn't forget all. I was contemplating doing my little manipulation trick of acting like I was getting it done but not really doing it and being super polite and helpful and sincere but really stringing the who thing out as long as possible just to push the authority figure to the point where frustration wins out over sympathy.
That approach just seemed petty.
I filled out my evaluation that morning in the greenhouse. I took me longer to find a stool, clean off the potting table, fix myself some coffee, sharpen a pencil, and find a good radio station than it did to fill out the evaluation.
First I checked the scoring to see how many above average scores I needed to get in order to barely qualify for merit pay. Then I started reading the questions. Then I got bored and checked boxes at random. "Meets Expectations" and "Exceeds Expectations."  In the comments I described my biggest challenge as being able to keep up the professional groundskeeper who had moved on to be boiler man.
My main adventure yesterday was running out of diesel. The diesel pump has a four pin round connector that is supposed to mate with a connector on the diesel vehicle you are filling. Apparently, sometime in the past, people would get the diesel and gasoline mixed up at the pump.
However, not all the diesels have the connector. 
I usually use a couple paperclips to hotwire the whole abomination so I can use whatever vehicle I want to transport fuel. But I was in a hurry Friday and the fuel gauge doesn't work right and I knew there were full diesel cans at the other building.
I wired up a much better system which is still rather unsafe but now I can at least fill the dadburned thing without looking for random drywall screws and paperclips. 

In other news...
I've almost finished the 2-135 paint. 
It is the classic "good from far, but far from good." I really screwed up the decals and had to mask and repaint a couple areas. I've just given up on quality and am attempting to just get it done. 
I had all the hoods on and discovered the lights didn't work. I had installed a metal firewall behind the fuel tank which would necessitate removing the said fuel tank and firewall to get at the wiring if it was a serious problem. It turned out to be a bad connection at the light switch which I fixed  by prying up the dash and wedging a screwdriver against the offending spade plug. I need a new connector but that would mean a lot of rewiring.
I should have been planting clover...
The weather has prevented any planting on our wet ground. I planted barley for my neighbor and got rained out. The tractor and drill are on the wrong side of town and the tractor duals are wedged full of goupy mud.
I think I'll bring it home today on the back roads.
I see the new "big time operator" has been advertising for summer help on Facebook. I'm surprised at the number of farmers who have liked his page. I'm also amazed at the people who use his services. He is notorious for stealing your land. However, throwing money around and talking capitalism makes farmers get all weak at the knees and while they talk big they really just want to be his special "friend" so of course he won't steal their land.
It reminds me of the hyena's saying "Mufassa" to each other in Lion King.

When they see his ten combines blocking traffic on Highway 18 they pretend to be angry but really they have secret, um... nevermind...
I would like to see land use and commercial vs farming tax laws revised but I don't trust gubment to do it without screwing the small farmer. The idea that large farms need tax breaks cause they are feeding the world is a load of crap.
The idea that large farms are good for agriculture because they hire lots of people is crap. Those kids that run balers and combines in the summer don't join FFA. They don't learn how things work, there is a service truck chasing them.
Kids who work for small farms where they are involved in the operation are the ones that go into agriculture careers. 
More farms make more jobs and produce people who know how to fix things, who have a vested interest in the future of their own land.
Feed the world my ass, feed their own megalomania more like it.

I included this photo to show the problems of painting with cheap metallic paint when you don't really know what you are doing. The metal flake tends to pool or spot, as in big spots, like metal flake camo at a lowrider convention. Which brings up another point. I want to turn my daughter's 72 GMC into a lowrider. But, no time or energy...

In other news...
Lulu likes the Blues Brothers.
This is my favorite movie.
I like the scene where they start swearing in front of the nun and fall down the stairs.
Last year I bought a faded copy on 16mm from a guy in Australia.
We will not mention how much shipping cost me.
I hooked up speakers and was prepared to be amazed. The sound was terrible.
Last night we watched in on Netflix.
Lulu likes Carrie Fisher so we were looking for all the scenes where Jake's exgirlfriend was stalking him.
This morning we are listening to Robert Johnson before church.
This is the lesser know Tommy Johnson. He also made the deal. I don't have a Tommy Johnson album... While quite influential he has a funny voice. (yeah I'm a philistine)
I made bacon omelettes. I started off with a lecture about the crossroads metaphor in literature and if it were possible for a person to trade their immortal soul and was heading straight for an explanation of faustian agreements and their importance in literature ending up Madonna stealing Brittany Speers soul and Katie Perry's supposed agreement with beelzebub but I saw her eyes glaze over and went back to cooking.
She just noted that all Robert Johnson's songs sound the same... But that she was still enjoying the album...
Yesterday she had Elmore James on the CD player.
I suppose it is alright to have a CD player if it is hooked to a 50 year old tube amp... And since CD technology is now considered yesterday and the new thing is analogue.
I'm such a rebel... Rebel lite...

Sunday, April 23, 2017

I get the new lawnmower stuck, I attempt to paint a tractor, general complaints

Due to weather cycles that us puny humans do not understand man made global climate change Oregon is having the wettest spring in years.
Mowing lawns is a bit of a challenge to say the least.
As my loyal readers may remember, I have been transferred to mowing athletic fields. I have suggested sheep and or a herd of goats as being sustainable and wonderful but the sheep guy says the school is worried he does not provide a barn for the sheep and the school is worried about sheep poop and electric fences.
Also, they worry about the oppression of transgenders (transphobia- I think its called now-a-days) which I suspect is related to a lack of access to sheep but I can't prove that point...
But, I digress...
The mechanic wanted me to try out the new mower. It is the last replacement for mowers that got damp in last years, weather cycles that us puny humans do not understand man-made global climate change inspired flood.
It is hydrostatically driven and has a bit of a counter-intuitive control system. When things start to go wrong they go wrong fast.
I promptly go it stuck.
I am really glad I installed my own winch on my Mule.

Note the thin cable between the Mule and the mower. The winch control is remote wireless so I can run the mower and the winch at the same time. $49.99 from Harbor Freight.

In other news...
We actually competed out tax returns a day ahead of schedule. I can report with confidence that Turbo-Tax is worse than worthless. Put that $80 you would spend on Turbo-Tax home business towards either an accountant or just blow it on good booze and get the tax forms at the post office.

A side note: I like to think I have a good relationship with Jesus, at work... Sometimes he takes me for the free coffee at the dining hall. He helped me get ready for the tennis tournament. Meaning-he did all the work whilst I mowed. He lectured me about Tequila. I didn't understand all of it. It would seem that the stuff with the Stag on the front is good. The bottle with the Goat on the front is crap that is a cheap knock off on the Stag. This is funny for some reason and I suspect has to do with "goat love." 
Jesus says a good way to drink Tequila is to take a bottle of Corona Beer, pour the Tequila into the space between the beer and the top of the bottle. This is the correct measurement for a shot. Do not mix the beer and the Tequila, "Because then it will taste like shit!" (say that with a heavy Mexican accent to fully appreciate the experience and bear in mind that Jesus almost never uses "bad" language."
I kind of think you are then supposed to chug it. 
Have not tried it as I suspect suffering will follow. As in singing songs about fighting with Chickens and a broken heart and land which Pancho stole from father long ago.
He also told me how to bet on the horses and how to bet on Cock Fighting. You never put your bet on the best looking Rooster because the scrappy one always wins. Never bet on the favorite horse either for the same reasons. I asked him if this applied to women as well and the consensus was that a little "Gordo" is good. I assume this means she is a good cook.

But, I digress...

I am attempting to repaint a White 2-135 Series Three tractor. I forgot the first rule of Farm Implement restoring. Never trust the paint codes. While you can get a lot of personal enjoyment out of looking up the paint codes the best thing to do with the codes when you find them is post them on New Ag Talk so people can argue about it.

Find a section of unfaded sheet metal and take it to your local autoparts store. They have a scanner and can then match the paint. When you get a match, try to find an industrial color that is close to the match, or just use a chart of industrial paint chips. If that fails use automotive paint chips to match. Stop a moment to think hate towards the regulators who have enacted insane VOC standards that have resulted in $75 a gallon paint now costing $375 a gallon. Remember that hardener and thinner will also set you back $150.
Now look at your tractor again. Do you really want to paint it?
It might be that using the above mentioned of theory espoused by Jesus on how you should drink Tequila will help with your decision.
In the end, I suggest spending the money. You only want to do it once. Knowing you are spending your life essence on paint will motivate you to do better prep work. Prep work is the key.
Don't forget to buy a good rust resistant primer. You can't buy DP-40 anymore. Thank you Al Gore...
We bought cheap paint for the sheetmetal and used a code to match paint for the engine and frame.
I think it is now going to be a Series I White 2-135. Unfortantly you cannot buy decals for a White Series I. Having a White painted as a Series one and putting Series III decals just drives me nuts. I also got a really bad sag above the door where I will see it every time I get into the tractor.
However, I seem to have lost the decals anyway so I guess it will just be a silver and not-exactly-black tractor...
I really hate not having the correct paint color or the correct paint scheme with the proper decals.
Plus, I am a terrible painter. Orange Peel abounds. I've never painted metallics before.

I can't find my old HVLP paint gun and so I bought a Harbor Frieght special for $15.
I took it apart and rebuilt it according to info I found online. However, the fit and finish of the parts lead to some problems. It won't stay in adjustment.
I dug around until I found my Sharpe 75. It was an awesome gun but it is not a high volume, low pressure model and I quit using it because the HVLP guns made less overspray. It is in perfect condition as I always cleaned it and it cost me a lot of money at the time. The cup is missing... I suspect it is with my old HVLP gun that I use for painted balers and home built sprayer projects that I never use after building...
So back to the Harbor Frieght special.
I went back to Harbor Frieght and bought a cleaning kit with small brushes. I took the POS apart again and cleaned it. I also put another filter and regulator on the air compressor and reduced air pressure to the cheap Harbor Frieght regulator on the gun.
This sort of helped.
The paint on the hood started bubbling after setting a week for some reason. I used aircraft paint remover to strip it. (Hint, if the paint you bought from the tractor supply store says you should use mineral spirits you have cheap paint. 
Find out exactly the type of paint you have and then get thinner and hardener from your local autoparts store. It will be worth it...)
I put primer on but it orange peeled badly. I can't seem to get the airflow and paint flow balanced. I followed the directions for thinning but it appears I have to add quite a bit of extra thinner to get the gun to work properly. This causes its own problems.

In other news...
My workstudy student wants to be a farmer. She is into "permaculture."
I bought her the Farmer-Stockman's handbook by Ensminger for a graduation present.

It came with the owner's notes.

I'm thinking of keeping the notes, but that is what makes it really cool. I have not decided if she is really sincere or just a modern college student.

An Apology...
I'd blog more but there always seems to be something to do. My iPhone is not a good blogging tool. I'm a lazy former farmer. Also, when ever I'm setting with a computer I find there is always something else that I should be doing...

I bought a Kinks Greatest hits CD for my daughter for reasons too odd and confusing to be related in this blog post.
I have this song stuck in my head...

Friday, March 24, 2017

Those idiot republicans....

I didn't think I was going to get a Rose Garden.
I didn't vote for Donald Trump because I thought my healthcare premiums would go down. I voted for Trump because I hate liberals preachy liberals are starting to get under my skin after eight years of a fake negro president, our first sort of, but not quite black president, Bush Lite. I voted for Trump because I think it is insane that I can't clean out a ditch on my own farm. I voted for Trump because I think the gubment is running a protection racket just like the mob with health and safety inspections. I voted for Trump because my liberal friend told me that even though I am the only white male in my department, I got my job because of white privilege.
I expect my healthcare premiums to become unaffordable because the Afordable Care Act institutionalized the graft and corruption of the insurance companies and once it was enacted the insurance people who signed onto it and contributed to the corruption were institutionalized and accepted and the ones who were deemed unworthy were put out of business. Even if the ACA is revoked we are still screwed because the competition that makes the free market work has been eliminated.
I voted for Trump because he was going to upset the apple cart (so to speak) He was a rich bastard but yet an everyday moron enough to appear on the Howard Stern show and laugh at himself. He gets in a big rig and makes motor noises. He isn't a smug prick in a bicycle helmet.
Rejection of the ACA may have been akin to Slim Whitman riding the A Bomb in Dr. Strangelove but it was me turning the wheel off the cliff and screw the establishment and screw you pathetic liberals. He put  climate change denier in charge of the EPA and a private school supporter in charge of the Education Department. YES!!!! I don't care if it all goes to hell. I love to see the shrill cries and hand wringing on Facebook!
But no, the Republicans had to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. I hate them almost as much as I hate Democrats.
I suspect we are heading for some interesting times.
There is no way in heck I would vote for Paul Ryan or John McCain. No freaking way, well perhaps if it were Hillary. Naw, I don't think so....

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Still sick, my Dynaco SCA80 phono stage sounds horrible, a bit about White 2-135 tractors, and Groundskeeping

Another epic ramble...
First of all, a statement about my health. I feel like crap. I suspect the Russians or the CIA or mind control. I've had a cough for what seems like forever. Sunday is the one day I can just lay in bed. The family went to church and I'm in bed. Now, understand the title of the blog is "The Lazy Farmer" but there is avoiding work cause you are a lazy arse and there is feeling like poop and staying in bed all day. Two completely different things. My wife is threatening to send me to the Doctor. I say no because I suspect that half of it is stress and frustration and that I'll have to go through endless tests and they will find out that I have a cough and I need rest... I already know that.
Then about blogging.
I suspect blogging is a thing of the past. I was reading this blog (Click Here) because he talks about Dynaco amps, mostly because (like myself) he finds the fit into bookshelves nicely. But, he seems to have quit posting. Probably died like half my other blogging heroes.
I just hope MuddyValley, the dude holding a duck, and the funny farmer from Canada, and that carpenter from England stay healthy. Now I left out the guy who doesn't have a job and he will probably leave a mean comment...
Ok, you get the point!
I still like to read everyone's blogs but the problem is that blogging is not really supported like it used to be. The apps that I have for my iPhone don't provide and easy way to leave comments and blog-reader apps try to keep the hits to themselves. I want to read my favorite blogs and have the people know I'm reading their blogs. I don't want them to see a blog reader link, I want them to see my hits in their stats.

In other news, I have started the 2-135. This is the last of my army truck engine swaps. It runs great but I see water in the transmission/hydraulic oil. This is bad as it has been sitting for several years and I never checked the oil. I should have drained it last night but my wife and daughter got Chinese food and I was hungry and I never went back out to work.

This is the preheater for a white Hercules diesel tractor engine. Those broken chunks of ceramic insulator will go through your engine and ruin it.

Being a groundskeeper.
Ironically, this is forcing me to learn a lot of things about spraying and fertilizer that I have always had a hard time understanding. I really miss not having a Crop Science degree. AND... my clever plan to stay under the radar and spend my days climbing hills with my Gator and arguing politics with workstudy students have come to naught. My boss keeps giving me more responsibility all the time (with no increase in pay) and of course I am compelled to try to meet his expectations. It is a curse.
I was grumping about being behind to my workstudy girl and she laughed at me. She noted that while we spent a lot of time driving around talking about philosophy somehow I still seem to get as much or more work done than anyone else (aside for the lady who has been there forever) and that she suspects me of actually being able to "really get stuff done."
I don't know.
I spent another 8 hours in pesticide class on Friday. This time with my boss. We went to lunch together. We discussed his life goals, his Christian faith, his upbringing with guns and his ability to strip a rifle by age six but yet his guilt from killing living things. I have the same problem but I am death on pop cans and varmints that run... Strange lunch conversation.
One mower for the softball field one more for the baseball field. I get to wash them both three times a week.

I have been really disappointed with my rebuild of a Rek-o-kut 120 tonearm with a Shure M91E cart. (I was considering a new stylus but I have run out of money.) Here's the deal,  I hooked it to the living room stereo system so the daughter and I could "rock out." It sounds kind of tinny and harsh. However, it sounded warm and rich (the kind of distortion I love) in the bedroom hooked up to a Scott Tube Amp and Dynaco speakers.
After some research I found that this is a common complaint with the Dynaco SCA80 amp.
To digress a little and get something off my chest.
The living room stereo is set up for surround sound for the TV. Unfortunately the folks that bought Grandpa the TV didn't think to buy him a TV with a headphone out jack. Now I can't really complain as I didn't pay for the TV and I didn't volunteer to go help him pick out a TV but I am going to complain anyway. It is really not so much an issue with the people who picked out the TV, but more of an issue with TV manufacturers in general. The TV costs an arm and a leg anyway so just put a stinking headphone jack on it. Then, you can buy remote earphones (or use a cord) and you don't have to have another remote to control the volume. Also, since the sound is not that great anyway, you could hook it up to an external amplifier. Having the option of headphones for your TV is really quite handy.
In our case Grandpa would crank the volume and forget about it because he couldn't hear. This caused problems in the retirement home and cost a lot more money when I had to go to radio shack and buy him wireless headphones. Not to mention the issues with an extra remote to control the headphones.
It has an optical output but that is a constant volume. So you have to get up and turn down the volume on the amp or add a preamp. But than means an extra remote. That is stupid...
I think I could wire in a jack to the speakers and then get amplified output that I could run through the Dynaco but my lovely and gracious wife and my astute and clever daughter feel that in the process there is a 50% chance I would completely screw things up.
I concur....
But I digress.
The Dynaco SCA80 phono stage sounds like crap. (see I think if someone gave me 1.2 million dollars this  blog would be a lot more interesting...

I am now going to go eat leftover Chinese food and then take a nap. I am pathetic...

Oooh wait, another story...
When I was forced to take on athletics (have I ever mentioned my feelings about coaches based on my experiences as a sports editor?) I also got the campus greenhouse. This is funny. We maintain a greenhouse for 14 plants in the library and the science building. In the greenhouse are "back up plants." I'm growing a replacement fiscis tree, ten begonias that the science lab uses for two weeks, and some odd plants that are placed around the podium at graduation. And like five aloevera plants that no one knows are there.
I started growing tomatoes, peppers, kale, artichokes, more peppers, more tomatoes, various plants that look pretty and I forget the names. My assistant climbs over the fence around the greenhouse if the sun comes out (like today) and checks on my tomatoes. I should grow pot...

I live in a random world but I guess that is just fine.


Wednesday, March 8, 2017

I passed my test and test the RekOKut

Repairing my Rekokut k33h has turned into a bit of an obsession. That, and growing peppers in the greenhouse at work. The peppers are doing pretty well, I put them directly in front of the heat that so they're 80°. I'm a little worried about starting them in pots and balancingThe amount of moisture they need versus the amount of moisture applied is a little bit difficult.
Yesterday I took the health and safety portion of the pesticide applicators license test. I took off work and took the test at the local community college. They have pretty tight security in the testing department. Frankly, it was more difficult putting my wallet keys hat and coat into the locker that it was taking the test. I actually had to read the instructions.
And I think I startled the nice ladies with my out-of-control hair. I'm really happy they didn't tell me I looked like a clown on the Simpsons.
I got an 83% on the test. They have trick questions.
I probably would've done better on the test but I was up sussing about where to find a good stylus for a M91e Shure cartridge. 
When I got home, I got ready to put the Engine into the to 135. But I kept thinking about hooking up the RekoKut. 
My daughter was done with softball practice by eight and I went into the house.
She was up for a test run. So I brought the turntable into the living room and hooked it up to my vintage Dynaco System that is supposed to be the entertainment center.
I found the kinks Kronicle album and we cranked up Victoria, until the Clapper thing that turns the lights on kept cycling.
We listen to the Kinks, The Cars, and a couple other albums. On the way to to school this morning she started singing, Waterloo station. She was impressed because she had been there.
I'm doing my best to create an odd and eccentric daughter

Sunday, March 5, 2017

A relapse and more rambling about lawnmowers and tonearms

I though I was getting better.
Last night I started coughing again. I just stayed in bed.
I am still in bed and it is just past noon.
The daughter is now coughing as well.
I was warned it might come back but I of course though I would beat it...
Yesterday I loaded straw and it was cold and wet and windy. This was not unusual and I doubt it set me back. I've been mowing the Baseball field and Softball field all week and that was really cold.
I did give my heavy coat to my new workstudy assistant as she did not dress heavy enough and the weather changed mid afternoon on Friday. I was washing the mower in the rain and she looked so cold hauling pine needles in the rain that I made her take my coat. Then I forgot to stop my other student who was driving off with my other rain coat.
Fortunately the fellow who I replaced was a bit of a hoarder and has a stash of coats and coffee cups which he found after sports events and he had a heavy coat.
We are getting ready for a big track event. For some odd reason it was decided that cleaning under the pine tree between the tennis court and the train tracks was a high priority. My pretty new assistant was commandeered by the irrigation and special projects guy who was convinced that people spent a lot of time in that little area.
The only people I have seen evidence of enjoying that secluded spot are those who turn old PBR cans into chronic pipes and leave empty 16 oz steel reserve cans.
It was ok as everyone looked busy and my other assistant was free to clean up the stands and edge around the Softball field.
But I digress...
Yesterday I was going to sell the last of my annual ryegrass straw and clean up the shed. I arrived to find my extra pile of three-tie straw knocked over with a number of bales missing, only one stack of annual, and then the tire blew on the hay squeeze.
My landlord blocked access for the trucker as he had the well-drillers truck parked in the shed and it wouldn't start.
If the tyre would not have blown I could have had the truck half loaded before they started the dadburn truck.
As it was there were problems. I had to sell the guy two-tie straw and I had problems with several stacks. It took me much of the afternoon.
I had a lot to do when I got home but the guy who I replaced and is the new boiler man texted me to see if I had a chainlift although he called it a chainfall. I guess I'm more optimistic.
I had not used the device in the ten years since my wife got it at a yardsale. I had problems getting it to work and so I took it apart.
There is an aluminum wheel with little knobs on it which match holes on the ratcheting gear. This gear is threaded inside and I think you turn the knob to set the brake to release the chain. I think the tabs allow the gear to move to change the direction of the ratchet.
I drilled out the broken tabs, tapped the holes to 1/4" threads and installed socket head bolts with the heads to the inside. I turned down the heads to match the holes and applied red Loctite to the threads.
It seems to work. This took way too much time and was utterly a waste of precious time.
Lulu wanted to go to Maria's in Amity to shoot pool. I was cold and a little damp but she asked nicely and I figure it is only a matter of time before the figure out that under 21 age kids are not allowed behind the fake half wall to shoot pool when the other half of the Mexican restaurant is also a pub.
The non-Mexican owner figured it out when I showed up with my daughter to play. But, he let us play Foosball for free and we had overpriced Mexican soda pop to make up for it.
Lulu beat me multiple times.
Later that evening I retired to work on the Rek-o-kut.
I am having trouble determining the distance from the spindle to the pivot point on the tone arm. I wanted to use the old Fairchild 282 mounting holes but they are slightly different.
Now I have discovered that the cartridge is not mounted according the the Rek-o-kut specs which makes the effective length of the tonearm different.
I am researching this...
I should be studying for my pesticide applicators license which I most likely will fail. However, I can explain to you the difference between the Baerwaold and the Loefgren theory of calculating tonearm mounting distances to minimize distortion when mounting tonearms.
Somewhere in my head there is a switch that is set incorrectly. There might be two or three...
In a side note, since this post is already so long no one will read it...
This pesticide applicator license pretty much explains why we voted for Trump and why I am overjoyed at his pick for head of the EPA and Education department. The bureaucratic rules and regulations to do anything in the country are insane and most are BS. I spent 8 hours learning the obvious, the pesticide label is the law and the instructions, look to it to find your safety equipment and how to use. If you look at the ingredients and use it for something that is not on the label you had better lie because it is illegal.
There was a discussion of how to kill the bamboo that is pushing up the rubber playground mat at the preschool. I pointed out that we have over a month when there are no children there. Then I kept my mouth shut. As we say out in the country "Shoot Shovel and Shutup"
Also, it is not in my area anymore to I really no longer care... But... If you pick a cold and overcast day and apply crossbow to the recently cut tips of the bamboo they tend to not grow as fast. Hypothetically, I read that somewhere. Actually a local city was experimenting with this direct application of crossbow and glyphosate to control blackberries without spraying the volatile 2, 4-D Esters.

A guide to making protractors and solving equations for proper tonearm alightment and mounting.

Sunday, February 26, 2017

A Sick day

Yesterday was a nice day, the sun was out and it did not rain. I was stuck at a training class all day. I have to get my pesticide applicators license for my job. I do not get more money. I did not ask for a promotion that would cause me to have to have it. But it is a job requirement which I found in the FinePrint which I did not read. I figured I would have to do it sooner or later.
It was excruciatingly boring. Eight hours of hearing about stupid rules put forth by petty bureaucrats Who have a incredibly unreasonably high belief in the value of their job.
(Note, I am using speech to text on my iPhone while waiting for my daughter to get out of youth group and I probably won't proofread it)
Today I was sick. I have a bad cough, sore throat and I feel like crap.
I spent the day trying to sleep and working on my Rek-o-kut 120 tonearm.
And listening to the Kinks. I was drinking tea for my throats and I felt rather British...
Don't feel British when "tapping the admiral" but a cuppa tea and I joining the Village Green Preservation Society...
But I digress...
Muddy Valley gave me a Rek-o-kut k33H turntable with a Fairchild tonearm sometime ago. The bearings have failed on the Fairchild and so I bought the Rek-o-kut 120 as it has the same mounting footprint as the old Fairchild.
Now that vintage stereo stuff has gone through the roof price wise I only buy things that are broken or unpopular.
So I had to convert the tonearm and headshell from mono to stereo.The wires going to the headshell were bad anyway.
I ended up converting it to a common ground set up. I connected the negative wires from the headshell to the aluminum tonearm.
I found instructions at esoteric
It was quite a challenge soldering the really fine tonearm wire which I bought.
Especially since i had to use powerful reading glasses to see anything.
It took my mind off the pouring rain, my job, going broke, whatever.

UPDATE: Monday I am still sick and my wife suggested I stay in bed. I am still struggling with the mounting of my Rek-o-Kut 120 tonearm. It is not as simple as I thought. There is math involved.  I suspect I was not meant to be an audiophile. I have heard that CD's are the wave of the future.

Sunday, February 19, 2017

Turning the baseball field green again

I am getting used to my new position at work.
I really miss my old area because it was beautiful. There were happy pretty college girls who said hi to me every day, and there were very few time-sensitive tasks, there were NO coaches involved, students sometimes bought me coffee, the lady at Security gave me brownies and pumpkin bread, and I had my own area where I could attempt to climb hills with my Gator.
Now that I am the athletics groundskeeper the only real benefit is that I have the greenhouse where I can hide when it rains.
I find it very difficult to hide my farmer abilities when using them will make my job easier.
My current task is to try and get the baseball field green.
I have an issue figuring fertilizer rates on small acreages and using lbs per 1000 sqft. I'm not so good with the mathematics and when the results are meaningless to me I find I have to covert to lbs per acre to make sure I divided the correct direction.
Last week I applied Ironman to the baseball field as it was looking a touch on the yellow side.
Ironman is a slow release 12-0-8 fertilizer with 14% iron.
The Nitrogen percentage is not the biggest concern as the Iron is what greens the field. It also 0 percent Phosphate which is what you want when you have a severe problem with POA/Annual Bluegrass, The reason the field is so yellow is in fact the Poa problem. Which I will try to solve using a combination of a growth regulator and a wilber-ellis product called PoaConstrictor. To do this I need to get my commercial applicator's license. I'm not thrilled.
Here is the problem that plagues me.
The fertilizer spreader combined with my driving and lack of concentration is less than accurate. A difference of one 50lb bag on 30,000 soft is a visible difference. A 50lb difference on 30 acres is nothing. So...I applied 6lbs per 1000 soft on the baseball field and 10lbs per 1000 soft on the softball field. Basically because I put an extra bag in the fertilizer spreader and I didn't want to drive back to the baseball field to spread it out.
The math to put it into perspective for farmers like me.
6lbs x 43 = 258lbs per acre vs 10lbs x 43 = 430lbs per acre. The softball field is a beautiful shade of dark green...
Then there is the figuring of the fertilizer rates. Mainly total lbs applied vs total lbs of NITROGEN. This is a big one. According to what I've read sports fields should take at least 250lbs of N per year. Probably in something like six applications. Depending on the percentage of N in your mix this could be from 500lbs to 800lbs per acre of total fertilizer.
Or 11 to 18lbs per 1000 sqft total applied product.
But when you say 6lbs of N per 1000 sqft it sounds like a lot less...
My supervisor tends to get those two very important numbers turned around. I don't follow what he is saying because lbs per 1000 sq means nothing to me.
But, I suspect I'm boring you all.
I'm growing heirloom tomatoes, kale, collard greens, garlic, peppers and cilantro in the greenhouse but don't tell anyone. No one has figured out we maintain a compete green house to be able to rotate 14 plants in the library... Depending on how you figure it. Actually there are 28 plants because we rotate them.
Have a nice week...

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Another phone

My replacement iPhone 6s died. A flashing line would periodically appear at the top of the screen and the screen would quit responding to touch.
My iCloud account was full as I apparently checked the back up photos option. So, it didn't back up.
I attempted to back up and restore from my iBook. This did not restore the apps that Apple no longer blesses.
I had to find a new blogger App.
I'm using it.
I can now add links and videos easier.
I think...

Below is what it looks like using a reel mower in two inches of water.

Sunday, February 5, 2017

A train wreck...

Lady Gaga at the Super Bowl in Texas...

Absolutely hilarious...

Confirms what I've always thought about sports addicts wearing funny costumes and showing together.

No wonder Hilary almost won the election..

On the other hand, toilets are flushing all over America right now.

I hate my iPhone 6s continued

Now I am really screwed.
I just can't leave the phone alone.
I have been trying to shut it off or connect it to my computer.
I took out the sim card and put it in a different phone.
But I can't unlock my broken phone.
I type in the password and it will not recognize the last digit.
Then it suddenly started typing on its own.
Now it is locked.
If it was not 1/8" think and made of aluminum foil it would never bent in the first place. I swear I was backing everything up to iCloud and Google Drive but nothing shows up on my spare phone.
I would kind of like to go back to my old android but I robbed the SD card from my daughter's GoPro.
We are a tech family, sort of...
So I have to drive 30 miles to the Apple store to have them tell me to go to the Verizon store.
This is the main reason not to buy an iPhone. 
Don't buy anything that you have to drive 30 miles to have them tell you they can't fix it...

Saturday, February 4, 2017

I have owned Mac Computers Since buying a 512 and I Really Want To SWITCH and I hate my iPhone

My iPhone failed again.
Funny lines on the screen.
I have a 6s and it is a piece of crap.
I can't back it up because the screen failed and I can't type in the access code. It is connected to my computer but yet I can't unlock the stupid thing from my computer. Whacko Islamic terrorists can get their phones unlocked by the NSA but not you average user who just wants to save their notepad.
I have no idea who Apple hires to engineer their products but I think they are idiots.
First of all, if you have a problem with the phone you need to find an Apple store and unless you live in a major city that means a long drive for them to tell you the most common problems are not under warrantee.
Second it is so thin that someone who works for their living cannot use it without a thick case.
Third, iTunes is horrible.
It is insane that people actually buy new and modern iPhones.
I have one because I've been an Apple person forever and I stick with my favorite brands.
I will probably get another one for the same reason.
This is a stupid reason.
I would really like to get rid of my iPhone 6s.
In order to not break it you need a case which makes it to big to fit in a shirt pocket so it ends up in my back pocket and I sit on it and break it.
I do not weigh 400lbs.
The thing is...
It would not take that much to make a good usable phone. Perhaps they should try testing them with the people who actually need phones for work before coming out with a new product design.
In short...
I hate Apple and never intend to buy a new product from them again.
And I think Tim Cook is a moron.
Not a Steve Jobs that is for sure...

Monday, January 30, 2017

Monday is the worst

One of my coworkers was discussing his fight with depression after a painful divorce.
He got to the point of downing pills and Jim Beam.
He was found at the nick of time by a concerned friend who knocked down his door and saved his life.
My other coworker asked him about getting to the point where you just don't think you can make it out of bed to start the day and the overwhelming feeling you just can't do it anymore.
I was a bit shocked.
Not so much at the expression of the feeling, but that she just flat out asked the guy...
I have pretty much decided life is nothing but a bitter struggle which brief fleeting moments of happiness followed by continual frustration.
My plan of enjoying those fleeting moments of happiness has so far kept me out of the pill bottle. Don't take that statement too far as I don't think we have enough pills in our house to actually do oneself in. Don't have to worry about guns because I'm a terrible shot. I might fall off the roof again but that would be just because I am awkward.
Well that certainly went morbid in a hurry...
No I am not that depressed.
I just have all these farming ideas that I want to do.
I have 200 ton of hay to sell and ten semi-loads of straw to sell and I'm taking care of athletic grass and parking lots.
I want to buy a mixer-grinder and make pig feed. I want to buy another 2-tie baler, fix the stacker, build an automatic hay preservative injector, paint two tractors, build a sprayer, rebuild the fertilizer spreader, tear down a barn, build a new barn, put my daughter's t-shirts on Easy, work on my car, plant 2,000 acres, rebuild my fertilizer system on my grain drill, rebuild the grain drill...
In short...
Not say yes sir to a bunch of career bureaucrats and drive around in circles on a lawn mower.
I want to spend my Sunday going to church, hanging out with my daughter, riding motorcycle, making t-shirts, not doing all the stuff I don't have time to do because I have to have a job.
On the other hand I may actually have a retirement fund. If I can maintain my payments...
Have a nice day...

In other news:
The people who shot up the mosque in Quebec were not disgruntled Frenchmen. Nope, fellow Islamic people. Click Here...

We are watching the news of the Portland Airport protests. People are angrily screaming "Love on another..."
As someone who grew up on cold war commie stories I am bitterly amused at the programming that has been accepted by our friends who call themselves democrats. It is party line all the way. I have yet to hear, "running dogs of capitalist oppression," but I eagerly await the change in language.

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

These Are Not The Leaf-Blowers You Are Looking For...

My daughter has affected me.
I have never viewed a full Starwars movie. I find them a bit tedious. But I also like to make clever insider jokes with my daughter and so I have watched parts of the movies with her.
I hooked up a large screen surplus LCD TV in her room and wired up a Dynaco QD1 passive surround sound set up for her when she had a Star Wars marathon with her friends.

The other day at work someone asked for a leaf blower.
I replied, these are not the Leaf Blowers you are looking for.
He replied, these are not the Leaf Blowers I am looking for... Move along...
The other fellow thought it was rather funny.
I was happy to engage in a cultural reference that didn't involve 40 year old country-western music.

Later, another of my co-workers insisted on buying me lunch at the Sushi place in honor of payday and new responsibilities at work. He thinks that everything is "Part of God's Plan" and that "We have a mission" at the college.

I had the octopus.

It was weird and disgusting. You could feel the rubber tentacles and the funny little suckers. I looked at his empty and deflated brain sack and felt depressed.
This is how I will end up.
My brains jellied and drained out.
Perhaps I will be happier.

Oh boy, another day at work!
I'm learning the job of Athletics Groundskeeper.
I spent all day yesterday blowing off the track.
I have to figure out a way to listen to books on tape. This is mind numbing boredom...

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Some rambling thoughts

I find Sunday evenings kind of depressing. Monday I got to work.
Today I was not feeling particularly well. I kept waking up covered in sweat during the night and I was sure I was coming down with something this morning. I went back to bed.
We were looking forward to a church potluck today but we all went back to bed. I stuck my head out at 8 a.m. and the family was sleeping in the living room so I retreated to the bedroom.
My supervisor has been sick for a week. (You may have noticed the groundskeeper sledding video from the previous post)
I do not want to get sick. I plan on using my personal time to plant or make hay.
I would have probably spent the day in bed but,
I had forgotten that my nephew wanted to buy our car.
I can't really afford three vehicles anymore and we decided if someone makes an offer then why not?
The check engine light was on.
I had thought it was a left over problem from earlier when I had coil and spark plug problems. I am a rather lazy person and planned on ignoring it and telling the new owner this is why I was going to give him a good deal.
But my wife bought a code reader and so I felt compelled to try it out. The error indicated a problem with the catalytic converter. (Apparently it is leaking cows or the Catalyst retired) Or it could be the O2 sensor or a loose wire, or a fuel injector problem, or a bad spark plug. There is a good chance it is a bad plug or fuel related but with my luck it would be the converter.
I reset the codes and started for Portland to deliver the car. The check engine light came on and so I went back home to check the codes as in my optimism I had forgotten the code reader. It was another 0420 code. I suspect it is Chronic...(get the joke? 420 is Chronic?)
I should have worked on the car two weeks ago.
I'm going to see if the mechanic at work will look at it.

In other news, I am in the process of building a trolley set up for splitting a tractor. I worked on that instead of the car on Saturday. I was having a lot of trouble thinking.
I finally settled on a design which was too complicated.

It will have a four wheel carriage which will ride on rails made of angle iron welded to flat plate. A hydraulic jack with a telescoping stabilizer on each side will sit on the carriage and push up a bar which is supported by the two stabilizers. The bar will have holes to bolt to the bottom of the tractor engine. It will also have support for the frame side rails.
The idea is to block up the transmission a bit, then use the jack to remove the pressure on the engine and then remove the bell housing blots and the frame rail bolts. It should all roll ahead with no need for a chain hoist.
We shall see...

The Hercules engine swap is progressing slowly. My helper seemed convinced that he needed to remove the injector lines from the pump. I would have just removed them from the injectors. I hate to disrupt another person's project but I want to pull the timing cover and see if the cam gear is bolted or pressed on. The cam gear and injector pump gear from the tractor need to go on the army truck engine.

Finally, Donald Trump has been a major subject as of late.
My college had a public forum to watch the inauguration. There was much crying. It was a little amusing as earlier in the week we had an address from the President of the College where we learned that the nominee for Education Secretary was expected to decrease the expenses of the college through less regulation and that her support of small private colleges is expected to reap further benefits.
Of course Donald will probably deport all the students whose parents are illegal but the college has already started resisting. The security guy found it amusing that college president has directed security not to pass information on these students onto the Feds. Not only has security never done that but they don't actually collect that information on students nor do they share any personal details with any outside agency. But, it was a great email.
But, I digress.
I chose to skip the party as I had a shrub to prune.
A coworker went. He got up and said he was a Republican and he really didn't expect the world to end. This provoked an outpouring of love and adoration. They all got to have a dialogue.
I found it pretty hilarious.
A simple yeoman worker who is deluded by the propaganda of the evil Donald. Oh my! The wonderful simplicity of his belief.
I'm sure that at the next wine tasting the faculty will be congratulating each other actually having one of "those people" at their college. Diversity is wonderful. Yes indeed, some of my best friends are Republicans, I don't have them here with me of course because they would feel out of their element, but tokenism makes one feel so much better. Shaking hands with the simple folk...
I did listen to his speech on the way home. I didn't find it all that dark and unsettling. My wife said I should not say that people who interpreted the speech that way were idiots. After some reflection I do see why it is interpreted that way.
When Trump made the claim that he wanted to be the voice of the dispossessed I assumed it meant poor and unrepresented people of all walks of life. What I didn't understand is that when you run that though the Democrat Nutcase Perception Filter it comes out meaning people like me...
In reality, think the the speech was a lot of hot air and I expect everything he attempts to do will be spun into the most vile and horrible abuse of women's rights and civil liberties since Tomas Jefferson trumped Sally Hemmings but then I didn't vote for Trump because I thought he would be a particularly good president.
To be quite honest with you, I've always been a little fascinated with the idea of Mutually Assured Destruction (Growing up at the end of the cold war and all) and I figure if I'm going to be screwed I'll do it on my terms and I'll take as many $%^&8#ing liberals down with me a possible!
And their little pink hats toooooo...

Have a nice day...
Tomorrow I go to work mowing grass for a bunch of really privileged morons. The athletic director with his BMW roadster needs his grass at precisely 1 1/4" for the good of mankind and the future of American youth. Gotta chase that ball! I'd go mow the football field but I doubt I'd get fired. Possibly retrained. (artificial turf-which I think is just wrong anyway)

Note: I really never had anything against Liberals until this election. I've always leaned towards the Libertarian side of things and I like to make comments which I think are clever. Perhaps someone can pray for me that I am able to forgive Democrats for sticking with Hillary. Or perhaps I just need the re-education camp. At least I bought myself four more years away from that...

Second Note: I just found this post on the original trolley tractor split idea. You would not believe how I have over-engineered this concept... Click Here

Monday, January 16, 2017

I get twice the responsibility and no raise, oh boy...

I do not aspire to greatness.
In fact I'm kind of a screw up.
This is me today while I was supposed to being trained for my new job. I did not post the recording of the other guy as he doesn't want to get fired.

My work friend transferred to another department. He gained a big increase in pay and added responsibility.
This morning it was announced I would be taking his place. He does all the athletic fields. This is twice the responsibility and I now have to get my commercial spray applicator's license. If I wanted to apply chemicals I would have got the license 20 years ago.
My old area is a great area. I have hills to climb and lots of different things to do. I don't have to drive lawnmower five days a week in the summer. Nor do I have to deal with coaches or have precise settings for lawn care.
I asked if I was getting a raise.
I'm not...
I really wish I could quit...

The things young white kids want to believe and we pay for with our tax dollars

I have a nephew who is really a nice guy. He is smart and thoughtful and totally and a good person. But he is completely full of poop. In another age he would have been a missionary or pastor. He now works for the Oregon Student Interest Group.
They go door to door to develop cell groups and it is called community organizing. Sort of the Jehovah Witness of the Social Justice Warrior Religion. He is quite good at it it would seem.
I avoid commenting on his Facebook posts because it will only make me look like more of a racist and intolerant white person than I actually am, and because persecution only reinforces the belief systems of people who are Marxists, Social Justice Warriors, Democrats, waiting for Space Ships to take them away, or other Cults such as John Deere owners, or who listen to Justin Queefer.
Here is a link to an inane essay written by one of his fellow travelers at University of Oregon.
Your tax/tuition dollars at work...

Click Here

If you don't want to click I can summarize it.
The USA is an oppressive state run by White Males and founded solely on Slavery. Slavery is perpetuated by the Prison system which only targets black folk. The issue of whether the USA is becoming a police state is bypassed in favor of a conspiracy theory of oppression only of Black People and Social Justice Warriors.

Have a nice Martin Luther King Dr. Junior day.
Don't forget to celebrate Jackson and Lee's birthdays later in the week.

Friday, January 13, 2017

The Global Climate Change Inspired Weather Continues

We have more snow.
I was called in early in the week to come in a 6 a.m. and do snow and ice removal.
I bought extra warm clothes so I would be the one to run the Toro snowplow.
While it is a bit nippy at 6 a.m., I like to run bulldozers, and I am allergic to hard work. It makes me tired.
I zipped around and plowed sidewalks.
The dining hall folks gave us a free breakfast! I had a very decent omelette and gravy.
The guy next to me pocketed a boiled egg for later. Great plan! I wish I would have thought of it.
Then the skid shoes on my plow wore through so the blade hit the ground.
No one was in the shop and so I welded up new wear plates from scrap metal I found in the scrap barrel.

Then I got caught.
It unfortunately improved my status at work. They suspect I have hidden talents.
This resulted in my being called in to do ice melt at 6 a.m. yesterday.
I told the supervisor I was easily confused and needed supervision. So he called in the guy who normally does it but is moving to a different department.

He spent the morning training me. We went to 7-11 for coffee.
It was much better than shoveling ice.
We stretched it out till 2 p.m. when we had to go home so we would not be paid overtime.
I'm hoping I can find parking lots to bulldoze today so I don't have to shovel.
I am now The Lazy Groundskeeper!
Then I came home and we pulled the engine out of the 2-135. Another engine swap coming up.

Sunday, January 8, 2017


I downloaded an app called YikYak on my iPhone. Students at my college use this instead of Facebook. I like to check it out to see if I am mentioned for doing obnoxious groundskeeper things like running the leaf blower. I also sometimes worry I will be called out for climbing hills when I think there are no students observing.
I have made mention once for cutting cookies in the snow in a parking lot. I felt kind of proud of myself.
I checked it out today to see if anyone was talking about the weather as we are having freezing rain.
This is what I saw...
If found it hilarious. I do wish Ohiofarmgirl was still following me. She would get a good laugh. To really get the humor you have to realize tuition is $46,000 a year. That is a lot of money to pay for a safe space to stick things in your bottom and have people take you seriously.

And now for something completely different, a record I found in a Thrift Store

Saturday, January 7, 2017

A Pathetic Snow Storm

It has been rather chilly in my neck of the woods. The temperatures have been in the teens. (Using the nonCommunist system of indicating temperature)
This has made groundskeeping a bit uncomfortable. It is not bad when the sun comes out. The worst thing is having five layers of clothes and having to go to the bathroom. I've considered just pooping myself but eventually I am going to have to get down to my underwear and I suspect there would be some objection from the home laundry department.

My lovely wife got me a Mr. Heater for Christmas. I'm pretty sure this would not be allowed. I keep quiet about it.

I've been raking leaves and cutting woody plants. The leaves are usually frozen to the ground but the point is really to work hard enough to not be cold. It is also good to be seen hauling Gator loads of leaves and clippings around. This makes you look productive.

I've actually had a student buy me coffee and a couple offered. I thought this was pretty generous until it was explained that the students get extra points on the meal cards which can be redeemed at Starbucks and so they are not actually spending $5 of student loan money. (I think)
Today it snowed.
My nephew from the city showed up with a spare computer to play some sort of computer game with my daughter. I was attempting to fix the four-wheeler so that I could tow her on an inner tube in the snow.
I forgot to shut the gas off on the four-wheeler and it filled the crankcase up with gasoline. Of course problems ensued and it took me hours. Then we discovered the old tractor tube had a leak which I attempted to patch and the patch failed.
So I took them for a ride in the snow in my pickup. I convinced my daughter to try "cutting cookies." I think she was not all that thrilled.

It is now raining and 29 degrees. I suspect it will be just a little slick in the morning..

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