The Useful Duck!

Contribute to my Vacation, please...

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Proof that 16 year-old Interns Write all the News For MSN


Somehow this article struck me as being hilarious. In a creepy way...
Note my favorite quote: "So, next time you're riding a bus in Florida and feel something hard press against you, it's probably safest to assume no-one's pleased to see you and just try to avoid making eye contact."
I think that is a joke about sexual assault! I am almost positive that it is considered socially unacceptable to rub your "stiffy" against someone else on a bus. In fact I have heard that if this happens to you on a bus that the person doing this is really not being friendly or "pleased to see you," but that they are actually committing sexual assault and it has nothing to do with how you are dressed but everything to do with them being a horrible sexual predator. Unless you are a political person from Oregon and you are dressed like a furry tiger. Then you are merely being playful.
I suspect the fear of such unwelcome affection may in fact influence the increase in sales of pepper spray and may even make someone think of getting a concealed carry permit.
Go ahead say I have no sense of humor... But once, years ago, I suggested to the person writing headlines at a small newspaper, that a good lead for the story on the fellow who committed suicide on Easy Street would be, "Life on Easy Street was not so smooth for.... who was found hanging in his garage, Tuesday morning."
I never in my wildest dreams imagined he would use it...

11 comments:

  1. Journalism isn't about truth or good taste; it's about selling papers to ignorant people who wouldn't bother to read anything if you didn't play down to their ignorance.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is about filling the space between advertising-as cheaply as possible.

      Delete
  2. Okay, you have no sense of humor. I will keep reading in hopes that the situation improves.

    Grace and peace.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I used to read the paper mostly for the funny pages. Until Pogo left.
    I never did see the appeal of Judge Parker or Mary Worth though. Probably in there for Gorges' reason.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Do these spam posts ever work? I don't care about payday loans or Plots in Islamabad and no one else who reads this bog does either. Are there other hobbies like online scrabble which would perhaps be more satisfying? What about starting a Legendary Stardust Cowboy fanclub? Now I would actually join that and promote it on my blog.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Perhaps I could sell him some sacred cow plops. He could re-sell them for a profit back home, and only have to change one letter of his spam ad.

    ReplyDelete
  6. This a riff on the old Mae West quote, "Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me." Of course, if you don't write that to make it obvious for people who won't know that, it just sounds creepy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, I didn't quite pull off my little humor set up either. It is a creepy concept to have that sort of conversation with a stranger on a bus. Especially in this day of sensitivity to sexual abuse and unwanted advances.
      So my title should have been MSN is written by over educated 16 year-olds.

      Delete
  7. Just 2 questions and a comment:

    What is Rep. Wu doing now?

    Can you grow annual ryegrass in Hyderabad? I really want to try out being a BTO.

    I thought you were the founder and only member of the Ledge fanclub.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We don't hear much from the furry tiger. Perhaps he will start a sideshow act with Sam Adams and the mayor of Silverton. Oh, wait, that is just general Oregon politics isn't it?
      Can't you grow annual ryegrass anywhere?
      I think there actually is an official fan club other than I. I am not much of a joiner.

      Delete

Tell me what you think

Please leave comments! It is really easy!

You just type your comment in the text box below the post. You can be anyone you want.
And...Would the joker who keeps clicking "offensive" please leave an explanation ?!