The week will be over before it has really started. The sun is shining at 7 a.m. and a real farmer would be out working by now.
But I am a lazy farmer who never really finishes anything and sits around bemoaning his lack of accomplishments.
It is a role that needs to be filled in the community...
My wife took the kid to the beach, it was supposed to be me going to the beach, but it didn't rain. She left me with a crockpot of pork chops.
I had a feast last night.
This morning I popped on in the skillet and fried a couple eggs.
I was in a big hurry as I did not have the will power to drag myself out of bed and lay there staring at the ceiling and thinking about all the things I wasn't getting done. Then I thought about selling chicken feed, and then about building round speaker enclosures out of huge wooden Ikea serving bowls and then if I bribed the nephew, would he mow the lawn, and then wondered if I would ever get that Robbe-Grillet novel finished and then who on the list I should plant for next and then I thought about buying a truck and if anyone would ever give me 1.2 million dollars and what I would do if I found a coin on the beach and it was one of those magic ones and I'd get three wishes and about the foolishness of that fisherman who wished for a sausage and then I though about pigs and pig feed and for some reason, my dad and his story about the neighbor who saw a flying saucer, and then I worried about my dad and then wandered back to sausages and decided I'd have a porkchop for breakfast and then that got me thinking about Gus the pig who died and then I thought about .17 rifles which were on sale at BiMart and that got me thinking about fishing and I decided if I got my butt out of bed I could run down to the river to "Clean out the grain drill," and go fishing for an hour before the fellow shows up who is spreading fertilizer for us.
But then it was 7:15 a.m. and too late to do anything.
I made eggs but I was in a hurry and didn't get the porkchop warmed up to "piping hot." Not that it was bad, but the egg was a little runny and there was some goupy stuff from the crockpot cooking all over the pork chop and I clicked on the link to Hippo On the Lawn... I got up and put the pork chop in the microwave....
So it is now a little later and I've only time for two cups of coffee vs my usual five...
Have a nice day...
This Blog does not in any Fathomable way reflect any of the current opinions or beliefs of the institution I used to work for. In fact my former employer has completely disavowed any link or reference to them in this blog.
The Useful Duck!
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And...Would the joker who keeps clicking "offensive" please leave an explanation ?!
And...Would the joker who keeps clicking "offensive" please leave an explanation ?!
Some days, it just doesn't pay to even get out of bed. I just hate cold pork chops!
ReplyDeleteoh i LOVE cold pork chops.. really. thats how i like them for breakfast. i am not kidding.
Deleteyes. 7:15am is too late to get anything done.
ReplyDelete*goes off to see hippo on the lawn and if that other guy got a dumb job yet.*
holy crap what happened to that guy's leg?!?!?
ReplyDelete*thud*
I wasn't even up by 7:15 and then I wasted the rest of the day at a farm auction sale. But thats a whole "nother" blog post right there. Thought about you when I watched them selling the 2-155 White.
ReplyDeleteDo not visit the hippo on the lawn before breakfast.
ReplyDeleteYou can eat semi-raw pork chops after reading the Hippo's latest post? That's way worse than the snake bite on his toe.
ReplyDeleteme? sure. but i'm a professional. ;-) i'm still wondering what happened. i'm afraid to comment on his blog tho b/c of a post he did a while ago where he said it was all gals who were following him.
DeleteWhat is wrong with having all gals following? I have a mostly grumpy farmer following.
Deleteyou're gonna have to try a little harder, brother. maybe jazz it up with tales of danger or something?
DeleteNot semi-raw. Porkchops that were cold in the middle and hot on the outside and covered with gravy that look like the drainings from Hippo's leg. The chops and gravy tasted really good but I zapped them with microwave radiation.
ReplyDeleteWell .... Its been a while since I have commented .
ReplyDeleteit was a toss up between donating or commenting and the cheap side won out . sorry . :>)
As far as cold pork chops , don't eat identifiable body parts . I'm more of a sausage , baloney , hamburger guy
I have yet to figure out this posting thingy . Seems like I mess up and can't correct spellings or grammar
ReplyDeletefor example I mispelled this word and if I correct it the screen locks up . End of post . :<(
ReplyDeleteLove your blog , Guess I will donate after all
opps , got to the log in page for pay pal , forgot my pass word :<(
ReplyDeleteNext time , perhaps a rummage through the office drawers and all the little slips of paper with important messages on them may do the trick . I do not recomend my filing system to others , it's cumbersom and time consuming , frustrating , . :>)
Yeah my system is to put important papers on the dash of my truck. Then when I open the window and hit 50 mph they all blow out. Warm weather really does mean a new start for me.
DeleteThanks for thinking of me. Just the thought is as good as the gift. I have somewhat given up on my 1.2 million dollar goal.