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Monday, April 22, 2013

Age 12

Being 12 is an interesting state. You are not grown up and you are not quite a child.
Our daughter is 12.
We, as in our family of three, made the decision to put the daughter, who was part of the decision, in private Christian school this year.
I have gotten some negative feedback from people in the neighborhood who are strong public school supporters.
I've heard some negative feedback from people in the church who think the school is a little modern and they also think I'm a little modern.
I'm not especially modern, more post-modern I suppose, mostly just kind of negative and cynical about life in general I think would be more descriptive.
I wanted her to go to private school because I don't really see any point in joining the real world any sooner than you have to.
That is the bottom line.
The private school is populated by kids whose parents care enough to spend money and time in order to send their kids there. The kids are a little sheltered-but, for the most part, they are happy and friendly and enthused and positive.
They have yet to learn the essential survival skill of distrusting authority.
Yesterday, my wife went to see her father and my daughter and I stayed home. I don't really know why. That is just how it worked out.
We went to Church and then went for Chinese food.
Had a nice time. We talked about her school and I told her some stories about being her age. We discussed the differences between my early years of school and how I turned out to be a weird and contrary kid and how she seems to be fairly happy and well adjusted. We discussed how lonely I was as the youngest with my brothers being six and ten years older and her being an only child.
I didn't do all the talking.
We came come and whilst I pondered my turntable plinth misadventure she practiced her guitar. I suggested she look up the girl band, The Donnas. I'm not sure that was a good idea.
I also suggested she learn some Joan Jett songs and pointed out how funny it would be to do a school talent show dressed as an Amish girl and singing a nice song and then launching into "I love Rock and Roll."
We discussed using humor to deflect embarrassment and the theory of making funny sarcastic comments which forced your opponent to laugh but also relieved your frustration. Or how to be actively passive-aggressvie as opposed to a victim.
Then she made an airplane out of cardboard boxes and we mounted Nerf guns in the wings. I took up a position on the trampoline with the Nerf machine gun and she bombed and strafed me.

It could be that she is watching way too much Hogan's Heroes.
We had a nice afternoon.
It was pointed out that there is somewhat of a contradiction between attending a Mennonite school and playing war. I noted that the Nerf machine gun was orange. That was not accepted as an argument.
I suppose I should add that, The Donna's are also not the Gospel Echoes.

The Donnas

The Gospel Echoes

Someday I will realize I am a failure as a spiritual leader in the home. This is what happens when two youth group outcasts get married...

My daughter is already better than I and seems to realize her father is full of crap. Is having this all out in the open now better than having a false illusion and finding out your father is a fraud later in life?I do not know...
I think I shall go and plant something...


  1. Hi Budde. I should'nt really comment on the public/private school question. Being a survivor of public school in small town Sask. I can only hope that private school would be better. Still sitting in my rocking chair waiting for the snow to melt...I'd like to watch the "donnas" video but have to ration my bandwidth so I don't run out . Might want to attend another online farm auction later this week.

    1. Ralph, I hated school. i hated it with a passion. My kid has a different attitude and has had different experiences.
      I completely support you and the rocking chair. I sort of wish I were doing the same. Waiting for the snow to melt and setting by a warm wood stove.

  2. its probably better she finds out now.. in the meantime that is an awesome plane...

    1. Farmgirl, thanks for the traffic. I was amazed to see a number of people visit from your blog!
      I also thought the plane was pretty cool. We had a good time.

    2. just trying to get the good word out, friend. ;-)

  3. Any parent who talks to their kid is miles ahead of most. Don't sweat it.

    1. Gorges, but you are supposed to influence your kid for the good, not for the odd and existential. Furthermore, a responsible Church going father would not encourage his daughter to find inspiration from girl rock bands, or from rock bands of any sort.
      On the other hand, this will insure she will never like that type of music as no self-respecting kid wants to listen to the weird stuff their parents listen to.

  4. We went the route of home schooling. I was not a public school teacher at the time but my time in those trenches has not dimmed my enthusiasm for parents taking other routes.

    The key to your daughter's success is in those discussions you have about Mennonite schools and playing war. You would be amazed at how many people never really talk to their children.

    As for her opinion of your contents, that will change when she gets older. The day will come when she will tell people how much she thinks of your opinions. She might even say it in your presence.

    Grace and peace.

  5. I admire your parenting.

    Lucky sequestration has inhibited installation of air traffic control in rural Orygun. They tend to frown on strafing and bombing.


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