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Sunday, July 6, 2014

How uncle Jack's barbecue saved our Fourth of July

Fourth of July has always been a special event at the farm.
It is not that we are extremely patriotic. Rather, The Forth of July comes at the busiest part of the season. 
In the old days, when mom was alive, it meant a big picnic and an afternoon down at the river.
When I was a little kid sometimes my Grandma and my Great Aunt would actually go wading in the river. This was accompanied by much giggling and lots of exclamations of, "oh my!"
As the farm expanded the Forth of July was the one day in the summer when we would stop whatever we were doing and come home for a big dinner. We usually went down to the river but in later years it was just a picnic in the back yard. Employees were also invited and so it was an event that was looked forward to.
After Mom passed away the tradition has been slowly dying.
My wife's family has birthdays on the Fourth of July and so they always have a picnic somewhere. No one else really seems to care that much.
If I make a big deal about it then my brother's wife will have a backyard picnic but the farm is not the same without a Patriarch who pulls it all together.
This year, my daughter was at camp and my wife went to get her. My sister-in-law and brother are taking care of Dad is a full time job.
My little helper texted to find out if there was a picnic, so he could bring beans, and got a negative response.
Now you may all wonder how Uncle Jacks and I will eventually get to it.
The hay department (meaning me and my little helper and whatever part-timers we have) is the most concerned with picnics on the Fourth. I suspect that it is because we spend our summers miles from home eating candy bars which have been lost under the seat and in the A/C vents and wishing we had time to got the Dairy Queen.
I sometimes haul them along to my wife's BBQ which is often at the river, but it is not really the same, I mean they are fine people and all, but it is not the Farm BBQ.
So, my little helper and I have our own picnic when we can.
One year it was Kentucky Fried Chicken on the tailgate at Gopher Valley.
I baled the neighbor lady's hay before my own and our got rained on. Dad and my brother and my helpers sat on hay bales in the shed and watched our hay get wet.
This year we decided to just not annoy anyone and do it ourselves. Little Helper was tasked with getting the KFC after he finished raking and I attempted to get the irrigation to work and then hook the 2-155 to the baler and fix the A/C.
I started adding up the time it took to go to McMinnville and the futility of checking on the broken window from the G1355 that has been at the glass shop for a week, and it struck me, Uncle Jack's BBQ!
So I used my trust iPhone to find their hours and phone number on Facebook and I called them.
Yes they would be there till four and they had potatoe salad and cole slaw and chicken.
So I suggested Jack's.
Helper came back with half a chicken, ribs, cole slaw, macaroni salad (named after the inventor to the wireless I'm sure) and a couple hamburgers.
My wife and daughter showed up about then and we had a feast on the porch steps.
It was nice.
Now here's the deal...
Uncle Jack's BBQ is an awesome place.
Everything is slow cooked out back and it is good.
They now have hamburgers. The hamburgers are thick and simple. They don't use pretentious beef and tough bread like the Blue Goat and the service is fast. You can get a simple hamburger, lettuce, tomato, mustard, catsup, big beef patty, a bag of chips and a pickle for under six bucks. AND you can call ahead and stop the truck in the front of the handicapped parking space, put the flashers on, run across the street  and get your hamburger.
You have to park in street with a big truck because the idiots who run Amity have eliminated all the parking spaces. Did I mention that Amity is run by morons?
And that is how Uncle Jack's saved our Fourth of July picnic..
And this is what the Hay Department does all day long, when not eating at Uncle Jack's or sleeping under tree somewhere.


  1. "I hereby dub thee our generation's Patriarch of the Fourth and Keeper of the BBQ.' Right before Lulu whacks you on the shoulder with a Pitman stick.

    1. I don't see myself as Patriarch of much. The Whiner in Chief, perhaps...

  2. I had a great uncle Jack but he never had a barbecue. Boy, that baler sure handles the hay. If I tried to push a swath like that through either of mine, two things would happen. My left knee joint would wear out from riding the clutch and I would soon exhaust the supply of shear pins in the tool box.

    1. I'm sure if your uncle Jack decided to BBQ then it would have been great!
      The New Holland 575 is kind of amazing. I'm in low gear with the Moline and the windrows are huge and looks like it is completely over-feeding. The bales were good, they averaged 82lbs. I find I don't use it as much as I should. The three-tie baler bales so much faster and I'm always behind in my work.

  3. I miss the old family picnics, but all the old family is gone for the most part.

    1. It was the old family that made the picnic. They were just better people than us younger folk. Had more character, worked harder, had truer beliefs, cooked better, got more done, were more self confident...

  4. All this talk about the Blue Goat and hardly a mention of Uncle Jack's BBQ? Then you only mention hamburgers and not the beef brisket or pulled pork that I see on their website menu? I think the lazy farmer has been holding out.

    1. I actually do enjoy the beef brisket sandwich. I had intended to write a real review but I just don't get it done. Kind of silly, if I hated their food I'd write about it.


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