The Useful Duck!

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Sunday, April 11, 2010

1998 Page views and I debate getting on a big old jetliner

I am kind of worried that my blog will shut down when I hit 2000 page views. I am not sure my blog counter can count past 20,000. To think of all the productivity that has been wasted! If that 20,000 represented two minutes per page that would be 40,000 minutes wasted! That is 666.66 hours that could have been used to increase the Gross National Product or to play scrabble or learn to play the Banjo! Which leads us to the other obvious conclusion. We all know the significance of the number 666. Could it be that the feds have been tracking your iP addresses and giving them to the trilateral commission, the Freemasons, and the KGB and that is actually important for some reason. Perhaps we have all been put on a watchlist for potential banjo pickers. This all happens just at the time when this airline pilot who I sell chicken feed to has hinted at the possibility of free airline tickets for Sadie and I to go anywhere in the world if we agree to fly standby and are ready to leave with only a short notice and if we will dress up so we can fly first class if needed. I am not so sure about the dressing up but I would certainly take the daughter out of school for a week. 
I thought about saying I'd just take the first tickets I could get. Who cares where you go. I'm sure there is something interesting to see just about anywhere. I could take the horrible and stupidly designed Microsoft Streets and trips and have a map for just about anywhere. You can always sleep at the airport or in dumpsters or perhaps kind people would take us in. We could pretend to be homeless farmers. I'm sure people love homeless farmers.
The world is our oyster. I'm not sure what that means. It kind of sound disgusting. Curiouser and Curiouser, said the cat.


  1. Strange but your counter only shows 8370 views here. Maybe its the metric system??

  2. Yes, discrepancy between pageviews (8374) on flag counter at top of page, free counter (2022) at bottom. Which gauge is vintage IH parts?

  3. And don't take your banjo with you if this guy is hooked up with United Airlines or whoever they've merged with. Last time I tried that with destination Portland Orygun, banjo decided to fly to Atlanta. When it finally caught up with me, it had obviously picked a fight with every baggage handler it met...

  4. Well i attached my comments to the wrong post. The counter I'm looking at is the one at the bottom of the page that shows number of hits from the first day of the Lazy Farmer. The 8393 counter started at the beginning of the year I think.
    I'm kind of afraid to fly. Rent-a-cops scare me. I know I will look at someone wrong and get a body cavity search...

  5. I'm also a little worried my underpants will unexpectedly explode. That would totally ruin my trip!

  6. Concerning the comments on your other post: I confess, Ralph and collieguy and I agreed to hit your blog about 100 times a day just to make you feel better. I'm glad it's working.

  7. Broken banjos too? This guy's (Dave Carrol) broken guitar on United airlines inspired him to write a song about it. Pretty good.

  8. Once we when we were flying home from Costa Rica we were setting in the waiting area watching the baggage handlers toss suitcases out of the plane into a baggage cart. It was funny until we saw our suit cases hit the ground...


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