The Lazy Farmer Arrives in NYC

 I made it to NYC. My friend has COVID and I ended up navigating to his apartment in Brooklyn via subway. 

I was a little worried but I had directions from my friend and CoPilot.

I was befriended by a very tall and determined Chinese lady on the flight. She wanted to take me to the address in her company’s town car. 

She did not think I should take the subway.

I helped her find her driver. After a heated discussion in Chinese it was determined that it was too far out of the way, but his friend had a Taxi! 

Apparently they were headed to New Jersey.

I opted for the Subway, but thanked them for their kindness.

I still have my kidneys.

It was only a couple subway changes and a half mile walk. NYC blocks are huge. Google Maps sent me the long way around the block which was weird. Was not helpful with the subway either.

Just hanging out and smoking a blunt… just like Oregon 

Off to Italy! This is going to be the best adventure of my life and I will be inspired for at least the next decade!

 I leave for New York City tomorrow morning.

Apparently, if you visit people in New York they don't pick you up a the airport because of traffic. So I am taking the AirTrain to Jamaica Station, then transferring to the E line towards Manhattan then the G line to Brooklyn. 

Me, being a regular city traveler, am absolutely not intimidated by wandering around NYC by subway. It will be fun! I was going to ask if it was the Last Exit To Brooklyn but wasn't feeling that chipper... 

My luck I will take Last Exit to Babylon and will be stuck in parallel timeline, which could be better or worse than my current one... This is what I am actually hoping for... 

For the past four months my friend has been telling me to relax, taking a month off won't make any difference, the work will still be there. You just need a reset. I have heard that from several people who are trying to be supportive.

Yes, the work will still be there. 

And Of course, when I plan something, things go sideways.

I had planned to have the last cutting of Alfalfa finished today. But, we got rain... We just found out our shed loan went through and the builder is coming mid September...It rained and I didn't finish planting Timothy, or get the annual ryegrass ground ready, other than 2x with disk.

So what I have left for my nephew has to do by himself when I am gone. 

20 acres of Alfalfa and 20 acres of Teff/Alfalfa hay, 200 acres of annual ryegrass ground to finish (one pass with vibrashank and probably 3 trips with harrow and roller-(fighting constant plug ups from residue.) Managing cleanup to build shed extension, building side racks for his truck to haul silage, plant 10 acres of timothy, deliver hay, haul silage...

When I get back, I can plant the annual, but I also need to make about ten ton of pellets, and do 150 acres of custom planting in November, plus another 100 acres of our own. And I promised my wife I would put new skirting around the house at least a year ago.

Then there are the dead tractors... 2-135 has no hydraulics again, plus a head gasket failing, three speed slipping in direct, oil leak from steering, 2-105 has no transmission lube pressure and I think it fried the PTO during startup because I forgot to put grease on the thrust bearing which became a serious problem with no transmission oil pressure. 1355 needs brakes, Stacker needs brakes, Both 2-155s are leaking oil around the head gaskets, as all three have about the same hours on remanufactured Hercules engines.

That is just a list off things to do right off the top of my head... 

Maybe I just need to start smoking Chronic...

I bet I will comeback from Italy completely happy and refreshed. I will be super enthusiastic and full of great stories and be really encouraged and inspired by the Yale graduates I will get to hang out with. This will be a new and better version of me. No longer will it be the Lazy Farmer, I will be the Inspired Farmer! This blog will rival Zig Zigler in inspirational material! I will be THE motivational blogger!

 

This is a representative image of my past summer and past life. After this trip things like this won't happen because I will have had an emotional reset and all will be right due to sheer positive energy!

I tried a dress rehearsal. I did 1000 feet up and 1000 feet down in 3 miles in the rain. It was sort of like groundskeeping only with no leaf blower and weird synthetic fabrics. I haven't tried the hiking poles yet. Feet still hurt. Mostly the foot I ran through the stacker cross conveyor chain 30 years ago.

Not sure about the man purse. Sort of uncomfortable.

I worry that the attractive ladies who post videos of hiking the Dolomites will lust after me due to my amazing middle aged physique. I wonder if there will be lots of Italian ladies splitting firewood while wearing improper safety equipment. I will take picture if I see them.  Also, attractive Italian ladies making hay on steep hillsides! I am pretty sure that will be my view on this trip. Also, cows. Cows are nice.

Wife says I can't wear my favorite hat...

 

Dolomites itinerary and what i should have done

I am leaving for an epic adventure Monday. 

Yesterday I got another detailed group email from my friend filled with helpful instructions on bus routes and antifungal cream suggestions. Ironically, I was about to reply to a previous group message by noting I had been successful in his request for Amish anti-hemorrhoid cream as a joke, but now I think it would be considered helpful advice. I may just have to bring a small pot. (In a TSA safe amount, of course)

In reality I should have agreed to the trip a year ago and spent the winter researching fun options instead of ignoring it until the last minute and then becoming beset with self-doubt and thinking how Rick Steves would be so disappointed in me and agreeing to go at the last minute...

This is not my thing.

Then... In a moment of frustration I asked CoPilot AI if there were scooter rentals to I wouldn't have to walk the whole freaking way to Venice. 

So I am going to one of the TOP motorcycle riding spots in the world and guess what? I am ducking walking.

I swear this is the story of my life. I almost win the lottery but through some sideways luck I don't quite pull it off.

My wife says it would be incredibly rude to ditch my fellow hikers and join a motorcycle tour. I could actually test drive a new BMW dual sport in the Mountains! It also would cost me quite a bit of money that I do not have at this point in the year. (and won't have if I don't make about ten ton of feed in the next two days, in the rain, which I can't do, so no I can't afford to drop four grand on a motorcycle tour) 

If I could think clearly I may be able to do it still. However my lack of thought clarity makes it hard. I don't have time to enlist daughter or nephew, and wife won't help me think on this issue. Maybe I could make a list. I never thought the final stages of turning into a bug would be this difficult.

Now I must go move stuff around in the rain and clean up messes made this summer.

My Weed and Feed customer whose name I thought was Radiant Pony until she Venmoed me yesterday, and who used to be head of grounds at Linfield College, has been telling me to put my tools away. I told her I would gift her the rest of the pallet if she would organize my shop and put my tools away. She took one look and left, laughing... I feel this might be a meaningful of my near total organizational collapse...

See my discussion with CoPilot below... 

 

Walking and blogging with iPhone

This morning,

I walked 2.5 miles with 20lb pack. Yesterday I did 3 miles and 20 step ups per leg. I took Tuesday off.

I am not ready for 4 miles and 4000 foot changes in elevation.

So.. I got to say there are ideas that are really great sounding ideas and they should stay ideas..

Like becoming independently wealthy with a Chinese pellet mill and a bin full of oats…

(I did sell two ton yesterday)

-blogging with the iPhone-

The few is so heavy that my feet are wet by the time I get back. Going to be difficult to make hay.

Mobile Blogging?

 I have been busy. 

I missed a couple weeks. People have been asking for The Daily Strumpet news letter. This is not really happening. For some readers people that read The Daily Strumpet (Americas favorite irregular newsletter) never transitioned to The Lazy Farmer.

Last week My brother and family were gone to a funeral and I attempted irrigation. I think it would suffice to say that things went wrong.  

I am experimenting with blogging from phone in preparation for upcoming trip. 

My butt goes numb before I can post.

I did flush earlier so smell is not an issue…

Barely any Barley this year. Should have planted more

Smoke in the hay field and an unedited post that rambles about nothing important

I skipped my walk this morning. I kind of feel like crap. My wife thinks it is the smoke. I think it is the sheer volume of things that must be done before September.

The TV says this area currently has the worst air quality in the world. I can smell burning wood all the time. It does not smell like Oregon Powerland, it smells like the baler or stacker is catching on fire. I have had enough fires in my life that I am always just a little on edge.

I have been listening to eatonrapidsjoe's prepandemic book on audible which got me thinking about COVID and working at Linfield University.

During the summer of COVID we had our first big wildfire season. I had to wear a cloth mask while mowing because Linfield was run by idiots. Ten acres and I had to wear a cloth mask. I suggested an N95 which would give actual protections. However, that idea was rejected because the idiots interpreted the CDC call to conserve N95's as a prohibition on N95s.

At the end of the day my cloth mask would be black from smoke. The smoke was so bad that visibility was limited to like one mile. I was told I could double up my cloth masks.

So I found another department head to get me a supply of N95's. It was explained that here was no real safety protocol written for heavy wildfire smoke so no PPE was required and by extension of this, no PPE issued.

The NEXT summer we had training on working on days with heavy smoke from wildfires and we were issued N95 masks when there was a slight haze.

These are the people who train your children...

I need to pull the air filters today and see how black they are

Just counted stacks and I am one block short of a full load. I have heard this before...

 What really irritates me in this smoke is the realization that these fires are the fault of government mismanagement. For the last 40 years I have heard that with the way forests are being managed there were going to be major wildfires. For the last 40 years every timber sale even imagined has been fought in the courts by the crazies. For the last 40 years they have all blathered on about roadless areas and natural cycles and the benefits of wild fire, but the only management done was through regulation and oppression of private landowners.

To add insult to injury, I don't think government run fire services can actually put out fires. I have observed local incidents where not only was the combine lost, the field lost, but there was real danger of houses being lost. All because they set their hoses to stream and not fan. 

I have heard tales from people hauling water and doing contract work for the Forest Service of Fire Bosses shutting down at night and the fire taking off again, of purposely letting the fire go to keep the money and management perks going, of just plain leadership stupidity where people die or get injured.

You always hear the prepper types talking about when society breaks down you will have to fight hordes of city zombies coming after your stuff. This will never happen. The city zombies never get further than city transit. It is the Anthony Fauci types and their accompanying police forces you are going to have to worry about.

They force you to evacuate, burn down your house, make it impossible to rebuild, impose regulation upon regulation, and then raise your taxes.

Its a brave new world... 

And I got to get this pathetic alfalfa harvest over with!

Buy yourself or everyone in your family a sketchbook. 

This is a shameless promotion of my daughter's sketchbook sales attempt

 

We bale straw, it rains, daughter has an Etsy Store where you can buy really nice sketchbooks and journals

My daughter came home to help bale straw. It was just a weekend thing. It was nice.

 

We baled a semi load of straw. Eight blocks at 56 bales per block. We raked alfalfa. We raked more straw. Then it rained.

 She has an Etsy Store where she sells hand made sketch books. Makes the paper covers by hand. Stitches them together by hand. They are made from good quality paper. You can get a little charm to go with them I think. I think everyone should request a Minneapolis-Moline tractor charm. I don't know how to promote Etsy stores. I suspect my readership is not really a market for sketchbooks but you never know...

Click Here for the store 

 

 

 

 

 

Life Work and Balance is BS when you got stuff to do...

  

It is 8 a.m. and I am sitting in my chair trying to come up with a plan for today. I cut hay yesterday. I walked three miles and make five trips up and down the hill behind the house. 

I can't be gone for most of September. It is insane...

Looking at the old crap we farm with is depressing. When I was my nephew's age in 1987 we were stilling farming with UniCombines and a Minneapolis-Moline M670 and G706. We still have the the tractors and the combines we have now are older than the Uni's were back in 1989.

I gotta get on it. Have feed to sell. More hay to cut. A PTO to rebuild. Straw to rake. Baler to hook up. Ground to work. Timothy to plant.  Sitting in my chair starting at blogs is not going to get the work done..

Nephew is an over achiever. He went from crane truck (RIP crane) to 20ft flatbed with hoist in like two weeks. This is the first load of hay being hauled with his truck. Our farm is the last stop in life for Ford Louisville trucks.

 

I adjust New Holland 1085 clutch, complain about heat, lack of directed rainfall, and just be slightly negative

 The last two days it has been hot. Heat and high humidity is the worst week of an Oregon summer. You are not used to it and there it is. Hopefully it left with the thunderstorm yesterday. Rosco also left yesterday. 

Rosco is not a fan of thunder. Apparently, he decided to go to the Dairy Queen which is like ten miles away and across the river. Over near where the farmer saw the UFO in the 1960's. There may be a connection.

But I digress...

The thunderstorm dumped rain on the outside hay stack, the annual ryegrass that needed to be combined. The slightly dead Massey 750 that has half a tank of seed, and the annual straw that needs to be baled.

It did not rain on the alfalfa that needs irrigation, or the Teff field that is languishing.

It did rain on the straw that I bale on the test plot farm. This goes into 2-tie. It is only 5 acres or so but it is is in little plots. Rain messes everything up as I can't really run a tedder to fluff it up and raking it drags straw into the bare dirt which is a bad thing. (Doesn't pick up well and somehow messes up the test plot.)

Yesterday I had to get my blood pressure checked. It always spikes when I go to the doctor. 

It also spikes when I get my turn off to Salem and find it closed and I didn't see it in town because I turned before seeing the detour sign.  I am sure my wife warned me about this and I forgot. So I had to do a little creative driving, but I was there on time.

The nice nurse who took my blood pressure and heart rate got a high reading right away. Then she started talking to me. Turns out she grew up between Muddy and Gopher Valley and was obviously a local of aforementioned valleys. When she was a kid her driveway was so muddy her dad would wait at the end of the driveway with a bulldozer to give her a ride up the muddy driveway.

All of a sudden she exclaims that she got a good reading, 126/85! I asked her how she did it. She laughed and said she was good at her job. I really agree. Wish she was doing my CDL test.

Her are some photos from my day and my walks. 

This is alfalfa and teff. I planted the two together because I thought the teff would grow faster than the alfalfa and I would get hay, but mostly because it puts down roots to hold the soil and this field goes underwater. Plus it should winter kill so I don't have to worry about it becoming a weed.  This gun run looks awesome. (See next picture)

This is why we really should not be growing Teff or trying to establish grass with irrigation. Our hard hose guns are crap. There is always a problem with the hydraulic drive on the one. Plus it doesn't automatically slow down as the hose reel gets bigger so it always going the wrong speed. This was probably the turbine gun which doesn't reverse reliably and gets stuck shooting out to the side. The Teff and Alfalfa came up fine but the Teff is dead. The Alfalfa will survive but there will be no hay this year. Also, the thundershower very pointedly missed this field and the clover field. The two fields in 600 acres that actually really needed a half inch of rain in 10 minutes.

The Red Clover is getting ready and actually looks pretty good. Last year it was pretty sad. I suspect fertilizer and hay cutting timing as reasons for success. I wish we could irrigate it. That would boost seed yield.

Yesterday I spent a lot of time laying under the stacker adjusting the clutch. The parts under the inspection plate do not agree with the part diagram and instructions in the New Holland manual.

You have to knock the set collar loose and then rotate the sleeve by using a chisel and hammer to hit the notches on the right side next to the throwout bearing and clutch actuator. Of course I went the wrong way to start out. You are shortening the sleeve which doesn't really make sense to me. I set clutch adjustment  by jacking the wheels up and then putting it in drive and standing on the brakes with the transmission in gear. Apparently the brakes also need work as I third was the only gear that would kill the engine. 

 

Disappearing Comments and Invoice frustration

I am supposed to be either taking the truck to the seed plant, combining, or selling feed.

Feed buyers seem to be ghosting me. 

Went after the hay squeeze to load the customer who buys cheap hay. He is coming Monday...

Needed to send an invoice to feed customer who pays via PayPal. It won't send with InvoiceASAP... Trying to sign in to Square. It doesn't recognize my password. (like Baptists don't recognize each other in the liquor store) 

While waiting for a download I checked this blog. I had comments waiting moderation. They were great comments but of course I can't remember what they were.

I clicked on "approve" and the comments disappeared. 

This has happened before with Blogger. Of course it is a dead platform and basically a dead app.

But thanks for the comments. I do live for comments. Somewhat desperate for approval in my small little world.

Annual ryegrass that I combined yesterday and the annual ryegrass I am supposed to be combining today. It has been 15-20 years since I ran a combine and that was a White 8900. I don't think I ever ran the Case/IH 1480. I kind of understood the noises in the White. I think this 1480 doesn't sound right. The White was more comfortable and had a better monitor but was more prone to catastrophic fires.

 

 

 

I walk, make feed, do apparant vandalism, usual mucking about

My exercise program is cutting into my blogging time. I realize that somewhere in China there is a bot farm that misses my updates and I do apologize. 

I am sure that all five of my regular readers and dying for an update on my feed mixing obsession.

 

 

My neighbors are out of the 1/3 alfalfa and 2/3 oats mix so I gave making alfalfa pellets a try. We had some very nice first cutting alfalfa. Actually better than second cutting. I have a ton of pig feed that should be sold(oats/barley/peas/corn/clover and alfalfa hay) but the lady never brings her barrels. This holds up the works as I need to fill her containers and then I can put the leftovers into 50lb bags. I made a 6,000lb batch so I do have plenty.   

My neighbor who goes by Radiant Pony on Facebook marketplace and because of that I will never be able to remember her real name, likes my Weed&Feed mix. After an initial slight over dosage why resulted in her horses craving doritos and Peter Tosh music we have a solid plan. It pelletizes very nicely. My Mexican customers love the fact that it makes the next feed batch reek of chronic. That has boosted sales in the past.

 

I see interesting things on my walks. 

 

I get a little distracted on my walks. I have been pulling annual ryegrass out of the new alfalfa field. Then I started walking down to the river to see if I could shoot a nutria. But I get distracted there as well. No nutria were harmed in this walk.

 

 

Someone was tapping trees for Maple Syrup and forgot about it for a year or two. Aunt Jemimiah would never forget... Uncle Ben would remind her...

 

This target is dead. Looks like three different caliber. Upper right is a nice group of large holes. Someone was pretty accurate on the head. Maybe a little aggression there. Pretty sure the dude did not survive...

 

 

I load my bags of feed on an old truck and park it in my neighbor's barn. I rent his field and his barn. Sort of. He borrows my tractor and stuff and I attempt to pay him rent. Sometimes I forget. Sometimes he won't take money. This really annoys his uncle who apparently is a part owner in the property. Periodically he interrogates my brother on the rental agreement and what happened to the choker cables his dad left in the barn 70 years ago that have been missing for 35 years. Sometimes he corners me. I like to be vague about it. If he really annoys me I ask him if I need to just pay him directly and then he does the whole passive aggressive, "I don't want any money just want to make sure my nephew has money." Then I tell him I think I saw those cables last year and give some vague location. He thinks I stole them. I think he stole our logging tongs.

Part of his passive manipulating bullshite is to have some sort of anchor vehicle in the barn. He had a IH dozer in there for years but his nephew kept using it and so he took it to his house. Now he has this POS GMC Astro Van. It is white, perhaps his plan is to give out candy, I don't know. He says he is going to restore it. Astro Vans are hot collector items I know that for a fact.

I set up wood blocks so when I back into the barn with one dirty mirror in the dark I don't hit his pristine van. Apparently the wood blocks moved... The first time it happened I knew it. I was idling back in low low reverse and I hit it. So I set up the wood blocks. Apologized and all that. However, I have been hitting it on a regular basis. I honestly don't see how I did it. I am so confused I wonder if someone is going into the barn when I am not around and hitting the van. I really did not do this on purpose. This is actually embarrassing. I would rather be a vandal than a bad driver but I suppose I will just have to embrace the latter.

 

I'm walkin...

 I've got twenty pounds in a backpack and I am doing 3.5 miles a day... Cuts into my sitting in my chair looking at blogs time in a big way. Not my favorite thing to do. Have not lost any weight. I just walk 45 minutes one way and turn around and go back. Ends up being three to three and a half miles. 

Kind of boring.

Speaking of walking...

 

Trying to get a sponsorship from Mt. Olive Pickles so I thought I would do my own virtue signalling in honor of the 4th of July

 

I would like to do a change.org petition to encourage the Mt. Olive Pickle company to bring back their flagship brands! Even Poseur Twats (official term with civilized spelling) deserve acknowledgment for past accomplishment.

I think it is pretty funny that the political wing that elected a dude with a Nazi tattoo in Maine is afraid of a flash of the old red and blue. 

In honor of the great heritage of Mt. Olive pickles and their love for the workers. (see previous link) I thought I would post the Frederick Douglass Fourth of July Speech from 1852 as read by Richard Pryor

 

 

Oops! Sorry! wrong comedian. I mean as read by James Earl Jones... So you have to check out the intro by PBS. Sometimes you need to go back to PBS just to see what a total bunch of boomer commie idiots they all are. Oh my, did I string together to many synonym for "Douche Canoe..." 

 

If you really want to put yourself to sleep this fourth of July, here is a link to the printed text. Just think, this lead to the invention of Rap music. (CLICK HERE) I didn't really mean to be disrespectful. He makes so really good points, there are great quotes.

“Fellow-citizens, pardon me, allow me to ask, why am I called upon to speak here to-day? What have I, or those I represent, to do with your national independence? Are the great principles of political freedom and of natural justice, embodied in that Declaration of Independence, extended to us? and am I, therefore, called upon to bring our humble offering to the national altar, and to confess the benefits and express devout gratitude for the blessings resulting from your independence to us?” 

Happy illegal fireworks day! 

 

Just walk it off... I walk three miles, I make feed, I complain about White tractors, I find a rock, I live a life of excitement and thrills, I should be a self-help book

I feel exercise is pretty much overrated. I have been walking 3 miles a day. It takes me an hour and 15 minutes. If I stop and pull weeds out of the new alfalfa field it takes me an extra half hour. 

Today I skipped. I had no motivation. I got another lecture on the beauty of the Dolomite mountains and I kept thinking, "4,000 feet up to see another tree..." I do like trees. I look at them every day. Rocks are nice as well. Sometimes I find interesting rocks on my walk. I should fly 15 hours and climb 8,000 feet and see different rocks, AND trees!

Pushing oneself to take another step is also great. A personal triumph every time. Yesterday I made my three miles in record time. The last mile I did in 18 minutes. But I really had to poop. That was a wonderful reward to the last mile, however, I could have had the same reward by having an extra cup of coffee and not getting out of my easy chair until I was in danger of going blind.

Not to be negative. Just saying...

The weather has stopped hay making. We are done with grass and starting on alfalfa again. Also have oats that are losing a race between reaching proper height and dogfennel. Dogfennel hay doesn't sell well even if  call it Camomile hay and say it is medicinal. The cows will eat it as I just up the rate of molasses I apply with my gatorsprayer. I have 1000 gallons of molasses, might as well use it.

I made 10,000lbs of feed. Sold 6,000lbs. I had 7,000lbs in orders. None of those people actually bought pellets when I notified them as promised. However, another fellow bought 3,000lbs of ground mix and I sold 40 small bags of Super Chick N. 

Now I am out of oats. 

Working on the POS White 2-105. POS should be an official White model. Maybe it is just a generic term for White Tractor. I hope they do not have White tractors in Italy. Probably lots of the POS Fiat that is the POS White 2-60. Perhaps I will meet an Italian farmer and we can talk about how much we hate AGCO. That would be nice.

The POS 2-105, has an internal hydraulic leak. I figured when hydraulic oil ran out of the gearshift  it was time to pull the PTO. But then I looked at a book. This is always a mistake. It could be the charge pump. In fact it probably should be the charge pump because I just rebuilt the POS PTO.

Apparently I forgot an O-ring. 

I pulled the top drain plug. I put a gauge on the pressure line to the PTO. It has 200lbs and oil runs out the drain hole when I run the PTO. It continues when PTO is in neutral. It stops when PTO is in brake. 

This was an important test. Not sure what it means exactly. But, we couldn't do it on the tractor because the lever seems to go into the brake position, but because this tractor is the POS model and someone stuck the PTO lever though the 3-point lift lever hole, it will never actually go into Brake when you are running the tractor.

Maybe I can get a nephew to work on the PTO. They are better mechanics.

I found rocks on my walk. AI says the bottom one is a sharpening stone. I don't know. Top one has quartz in it. I returned them to the field.

The POS 2-155 has a flat front tire. We had Superior Tire Service come out to fix a different tractor tire. I over filled the tire so I could move the tractor near their truck. They couldn't figure out where the leak was because the tire was not flat. Meanwhile air is hissing from the valve stem and around the bead. I would not say they are complete idiots. I mean, they found the farm...

This was Tuesday's walk I think. Yesterday I did about the same but walked a little faster. Pulling annual ryegrass out of the new alfalfa cuts my speed per hour. 

 

What I need to do is find a sponsor for my trip. I have read about the high principles of the Mount Olive Pickle company. Perhaps they would sponsor me! I am partial to the Little Rebel dill variety. 

Apparently the Little Rebel label was dropped after the Southern Poverty Law Center had to drop its support for the label. Too much Turmeric I suppose...

 

I decide to do excercise for the first time in my life...

Today I walked 3 miles in an hour. I forgot to shut off the tracking so it shows the half hour it took me to make breakfast. Probably did 3 miles in an hour and 15 minutes.

 

Two miles was not a big deal. But I can feel the extra mile. 

The main problem is that it takes an hour and I have a pretty hard time dragging my lazy arse out of bed in the morning anyway, not to mention dragging it out to go walk for an hour. I should pack a gun and then I would be a "hunter." 

I saw a coyote this morning. He was catching mice in the ryegrass field. This is an excellent use for coyotes. They don't wake me up now that I have that idiotic sleep apnea machine. Don't hear anything but the plastic lung hissing all night.

It rained last night. The hay is inside and now I have to make feed. Customers have been calling. I need a hobby that doesn't involve noise and dust, or if it does, fun enough to make it worthwhile.

I checked out my instagram while walking. First time in a month. I was going to post alfalfa pictures or look for more Minneapolis-Moline tractor videos.

To my great surprise and somewhat embarrassment my feed was filled with busty girls in leather swimsuits splitting wood. I sincerely would like to know what algorithm produced this result. (Mostly so I could continue it) 

The outfits do seem impractical but they seriously put effort into the swing so I would give a thumbs up!

I don't really understand Instagram.

I generally post pictures of the Moline G1355 cutting hay or driving the Gator into large mud puddles. One would think this would result in similar suggested content. But no...

For a while I got videos of Scandinavian women pushing hay forks on steep hillsides. That was nice as well. Before that were cute girls who were daring each other to touch electric fences, (ok I might have searched for that one)

These seem to be pretty specific niche markets which I have not been searching for. In fact I did not even know they existed. 

I wonder if I talk in my sleep and my phone is listening...? 

But I digress... 

 

Alfalfa bloom when I first started walking and rain was predicted ten days out.

Alfalfa Bloom yesterday morning. It is pretty much 100 percent bloom. The oat field I was going to take for hay is short and in milk stage. We have two-three days of showers.

 

This morning's view of the alfalfa bloom. Looks like deer have discovered the blooms. Some of it is going down from the rain. I wish it would actually rain more than .10 inches. Perhaps do some good.

 

 

 

I am agreeable for five minutes and it bites me in the arse... More adventures

What a week...or two

The hay went from top quality to over ripe essentially in two days. Now it is crap and the last hundred acres seems to be a record yield...

I am waiting for my doctor appointment. Getting my hip looked at as it still hurts from the break two years ago.

I was optimistic for one week and that got me in a lot of trouble. Every morning I need to wake up and say to myself. "Today I will say no..." Just a good way of living my life.

My friend from high school has been bugging me for a year to go on a "walk," though the Dolomite Mountains in Italy, in September.

I said no...

Because, while it may be the trip of a lifetime it is not the trip of my life time. 

September is when I do all my straw baling. We have at least 300 acres of ground to work and plant. I want to get a new dog and don't want to leave it a month, I don't like Italian food, if I wanted to go somewhere I don't speak the language I would got to Mexico, I do not care about pushing myself to hike ten #$%^&*ing miles a day, I do not know anyone from Yale or the Yale crew team, and if I want to look at where my lime comes from I would just drive by the @#$%^&*ing lime shed outside of McMinnville.

I would love to go to Ireland (might even hike there), go to England and see the guy with the little farm that makes berry scoops, go to Canada and see if Ralph would take me for a ride in his Mercury, go visit my friends in Florida and see the Christmas program at the Chicken Church, go to fishing with my friend Tim, go to Christmas Valley and fix a tractor, go to California and buy another Landcruiser with my friend Mark.

If I wanted to work out every day I would do I so I could go motorcycle riding in the woods with my brother. In fact, I need to fix three motor cycles so I could go riding, which is a thing that does bring me actual pleasure.

But no...

I went all Rick Steves on myself and said yes... Chance of a life time. My friend said he would pay... 

Then I got the itinerary, I am back on the group chat. I realize that this is some sort of push yourself to succeed BULLSHITE and I really don't want to walk a fecking eight miles a day in the mountains, dress like a fecking tourist, bond with people, spend money, be in new uncomfortable situations with little return on emotional investment. 

Everyone I tell is laughing about it. 

I am just sort of low level angry.

Started walking. Did two miles a day with no problem. 

My daughter says I have a bad attitude... 

Walking to the river and back in the morning is great. But I have bales on the ground I should be stacking or I should be making feed. I don't have time for exercise for exercise sake. I stacked bales yesterday, that was exercise, I walked a mile to my pickup Tuesday, that was exercise, I pushed in the clutch on the stacker 5 million times yesterday, that was exercise, I saw a tree yesterday, it was scenic...

 UPDATE: Orthopedic doctor says I have arthritis. Says it is a crime against humanity for me not want to go hiking the Dolomites and she won't remove my pins because then I couldn't go... I have to wait. Got a mini lecture from my doctor... 

Her: "You are a farmer, you can do 8 miles a day..."

Me: "But I am lazy..."

Her: "Right...." 

The best addition I made to my Great Plains drill (other than a Loupe Seed Monitor)

The Great Plains 1500 grain drill has one very frustrating short coming. The small seed cups are unprotected and if it rains they get wet. This is especially frustrating if you are planting clay coated seed. The coating melts and makes a sludge in the bottom of the seed cup which plugs up the plastic fluted feed and you have to pressure wash the inside of the small seeds bin to actually get it clean. Super frustrating when using the small seeds to drop slug bait when no-tilling. 

A couple years ago I got a local tent and awning company to make me a fitted grain drill cover. It was expensive but it is essential when it rains and you have seed in the drill. It is made so it folds down over the front and back and has cutouts for the flashers. It folds back up into a compact square and I have a place to store it on the drill.

It rained last night. Not really enough to do much good. But the threat of rain was enough to speed up the hay baling operation significantly.

Unfortunately we still have another 140 acres to go and everything is turning color. It is supposed to be 90 degrees by the end of the week so that will be the end of nice pretty grass hay.

I am trying to plant alfalfa. We had to wait on lime and I didn't get it planted early like I wanted to do. I also decided to water the ground before planting. The plan was to plant into the moisture rather than plant into dry dirt and then irrigate. This was a solid plan but then I needed to do hay and then I started seeing a broad leaf sprout so I decided to harrow it all again. I should have waited till the rain was past and then I really would have had a sprout to work up but I got in a rush because I thought I could plant yesterday.

But then there was a flat tire, and apparently there is something in the fuel tank because the tractor kept dying when I turned right, then it completely quit and it took me an hour to bleed the lines and get it started again.

I planted 10 acres of Teff but didn't start on the alfalfa as I didn't want to plant the alfalfa in the dark. 

This morning I got to the field just in time to tarp the grain drill. Spent the rest of the morning working on hay equipment in the rain.

 

It is going to be a great day I can feel it in my bones

The week loomed but failed to inspire me into great production levels. So far I have not accomplished what I should have but more than I would have. It sounds better on paper than it looks in real life...

I finished working 25 acres for alfalfa. While the neighbors endlessly flogged 200 acres. I got tired of moving clods the size of small pebbles around and got the Nephew to put out irrigation. Of course it turned out there was considerably less hose on the irrigator than we thought so that kind of went south...

Yesterday I cut 20 more acres of alfalfa. Some of it was getting very rank and had annual ryegrass choking it. The alfalfa in the picture is short and light green with yellow tinged leaves. Might have a little bit of a deficiency. I of course can't remember the blend I used in the spring. 0-0-50-18? Should probably add more, also write things down and not lose the tablet. Of course the Weather forecast on the TV this morning says possible showers Wednesday. Maybe I should cut the 30 acres of red clover also. If you are going down people enjoy the show more if you add flames.

Big Old Jetliner, was circling the farm yesterday. Probably signal jamming my GPS so my field lines are crooked as some sort of a nefarious plot to disrupt my sanity. I showed them as my sanity was already disrupted and I can't drive straight regardless of GPS. If I had autosteer I would probably still auto wander...

 

 

The week looms ahead of me

I need a service truck. An air compressor mounted on a Chevy Luv trailer is not the ideal setup. 

Over the years I worked off the farm all my farm equipment suffered. Especially my service truck, a 1989 Ford F250 with a 460. (Lack of exhaust plumbing under the engine seems to have confused the O2 sensor and my helper put the front wheel drive assembly together wrong. And something is wrong with the electrics so it doesn't start reliably and shuts off randomly while driving)

I left the grain drill next to the field I need to plant. It had two flat tires. On the same side. The two tires I just had repaired.

If only I was not lazy and would get more work done...

This week, need to spray weed patches with Gator Sprayer, Plant alfalfa, make cow feed, cut hay, fix brakes on Moline 1355, fix rain spout so my wife can steal water from the state of Oregon for her garden, fix the tire on my LN8000, and clean my shop.

If I do one thing on the list it will be a success...

 

I observe how to farm in the modern way

I have been watching the megafarmer's helper work ground next to my hay making misadventure. It is amazing and depressing at the same time.

This is probably 300 acres of river bottom ground and they are flogging it hard. I think it is going in to corn again.

They started with one of those huge John Deere articulated tracked machines and like a 20 foot disk ripper. Ripped it at least twice and now using second one with a heavy harrow and roller set up to smooth and break clods.

Earlier in the week I watched the tractor operator dig mud out of the rolling baskets behind the ripper at one end of the field, while raising dust at the other end and could see where this was all going. 

The ground is in the dreaded golf ball round clod stage and has no moisture, but I don't think it is going to matter, with that much weight and horsepower, it will break down.

If it doesn't, they will just plant the corn into dry soil and apply so much water that the ground melts together. The cost and time do not really matter. 

My neighbor that owned the place was one of the really good old school farmers. He has been gone a good ten years and the ground is rented out for a lot of money.

I remember him out at my Uncle's farm store at coffee time talking about working ground. Talking about the different soil types on his farm. The good Chehalis soil by the river and how to work the heavy clay Wapato on the wet ground. 

Back when a really big tractor was 110hp, and irrigation was hand lines or a big awkward Vermeer, knowing how to work your ground was incredibly important.  

You didn't work up more ground then you could get packed back down before it dried out. If you were under a dust cloud when spring farming, you were in trouble.

I actually bought his 16 foot equipment and have been using it to work up 20 acres to plant alfalfa. I thought I was doing it wrong when I plowed 30 acres and let it get a little too dry on top. In fact I am fighting that problem with the alfalfa ground.

But the newer and better farmer is doing 300 acres at once and that is modern efficiency. I keep thinking of my farming advocate neighbor who likes to quote USDA stats about how one modern farmer produces more that 20 old time farmers. 

I think it is more like one modern farmer has displaced 50 farmers who knew their land and lived their local farm existence. 

Progress... 

I am watching out the window of my ancient New Holland 1085 stacker as my neighbor works ground the right way. I have a friend that keeps sending me Tristan Swartz videos where he talks about his small scale dairy farming. The old ways are never coming back.

 

 

 

I fertilize oats but have adventures along the way. Probably more of a quest for fertilizer rather than a trip for fertilizer

Some years ago I purchased a 1972 Ford LN8000 with a 6-71 Detroit diesel, 13 speed, tandem axles, 24ft bed. It is loud, rough rough riding, and it is getting long in the tooth. I can't remember when I acquired it. Probably 15 years ago. (The earliest reference I found on this blog for  Detroit 6-71 was in 2011.)  I bought it off of Craigslist. Got a good deal because the car battery the guy was using, wouldn't spin the engine fast enough to start, and there was an air leak in the shifter so it was stuck in low range.

It is bad enough that the nephew quit using it to haul hay. Kept falling through the holes in the bed I suspect. I have been using it haul fertilizer. I got stuck when we had the thunderstorm and got 2” rain in 15 minutes.
The front tires sank to the axles in the hay field so I just left it until I could get help to get it out.
A month later, someone got it unstuck and drove it out to the field road.

Only problem was the left front tire was flat came off the bead.
I had to get fertilizer so I ended up fixing it.
I couldn’t get a jack under the axle with the tire flat. I was a little worried about taking the forklift down the hill with no brakes.  Then I had a grand idea! 

The Crane Truck.. 

 

I lifted the left side off the ground, found a can of starting fluid and a lighter and popped the tire right back on. Only a small amount of flames. Pretty slick concept really.

The next day I topped off the air and set off to get fertilizer. 

Our formerly local cooperative, which is now owned by some company from Idaho, has decided to rebuild the local fertilizer plant. Apparently the new thing is to close all the small plants and move to one big location so as to be less convenient for 80 percent of your customers. Great idea! 

Since I had to drive a half hour to the other soon to be closed location, I just continued on another ten minutes to the competition who are slightly cheaper. 

On the way a wasp nest dropped off the sun visor on me.  

I killed it. 

Then my neighbor called me and somehow I ended up driving right past the dealer whose box I was using and driving 2 miles out of the way to get one bag of of Orchardgrass seed that turned out to be $200 for 50lbs. Of course they only take cash or check…but I have cash from chicken feed so no worries. Maybe I will get a planting job.

I had to pickup 6,000lbs dry 40-0-0-6 (urea based) and 400 gallons liquid two different types in 350 gallon tanks. 
The guy at the fertilizer plant had a tic. He would suddenly, and with no provocation, jerk his head to the right and go “uurrrrp!”
Scared the heck out of me the first time it happened. Of course I jumped and turned to see what he was looking at.
Freaked me out. After that I pretty much managed not to react. Nice guy I didn't mean to be a jerk.

But I digress... 

Now, you need to keep in mind, It was a good half hour drive to the fertilizer plant in a 1972 Ford LN8000 with a loud under powered Detroit 6-71 engine and a 13 spd transmission that you have to shift for every little hill to maintain 54 mph.

Right out of the yard the shuttle tanks I was using to hold fertilizer started sloshing so bad I thought I was going to lose one off the side. 10-34 fertilizer is like 13lbs to the gallon, so 200 gallons sloshing is a big deal.
I stopped and added straps. Not a big deal but the winches did not line up with the tanks. I finally found some clamp on winches in the bottom of the tool box. Now I am one my way.
So, I took off down 99W and about 2/3 of the way home the accelerator goes to the floor and won't return. Later I was to discover that the alternator broke off and fell on the throttle causing the diesel engine to run wide open. Not a big deal as it is an old Detroit 6-71 and you pretty much run it up against the governor anyway. BUT To shift I had to reach down and pull up on the accelerator pedal. 

A bit dicey in downtown Amity… 

When I got home I popped the hood. 

A few minutes with the welder and I am back in business. Of course the tire went flat again so there is that... 

Spreading fertilizer on oats for hay. I should have spread fertilizer and then planted through the fertilizer but wasn't able to coordinate getting a spreader. We really need a working fertilizer spreader. Hopefully we have enough days left for good growth on the oats.