The Useful Duck!

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Monday, February 11, 2019

I get my college bill and understand why small non ivy league private colleges are going broke.

For those of you who are just randomly stopping by I shall explain. I am a farmer who decided to become a groundskeeper at a small liberal arts college so my daughter could get free college tuition. 
I did this partly because it looked like she was going to be a writer and I was probably the bad influence. 
Student loans suck the life out of you and a liberal arts education is not always useful.
Fortunately she decided to become a nurse and the college I work at has a great nursing program.
The fiscally sensible thing for her to do would be to live at home and commute the 7.5 minutes it takes to get to school.
Speaking of fiscally sensible things, I decided to take advantage of my free tuition benefit and take an accounting course.
I hate accounting. I hate balance sheets, asset to debt ratios, debits, accounts payable, and my mind goes numb hearing about them. In fact I'm kind of drifting off right now.
But some day I am going to have to actually do it. 
I can't take the class for credit because I already have a degree.
That is idiotic. They say it is a tax issue, I say it is BS.
More creative accounting.
It brings to mind why I hate accounting.
Small colleges usually give tuition discounts to make up for the pathetic pay scale. When times are good they see it as a great benefit. But when times are bad and they want to cook the books the decide it is a expense and want to cut it to make it appear they are saving money. It only puts off the inevitable as potential employees realize they can just get a real job and save for college with the difference in pay...
So I got my bill today. Over $5,000 for a four credit accounting class. The nice lady at the counter even said it with a straight face. 
I think I clicked on the take it for credit box on the online application to see if I could get away with it.
Now I'm back down to an audit. There were a few phone calls and a trip to the registrars office.
Let's add this up... $5,000 for a 200 level intro to accounting class and $235 for class a stack of photocopies and a time limited access code for a website text book. Sounds like one heck of an advertisement for community college for me.
Actually, that is my plan. I'm taking the "free" class so I actually know enough terms to take the financial accounting for farmers from the community college. Because that is the one I can actually use. 
yeah, I'm going to do a few debt asset ratios to find investment opportunities for my private investing account. Yup, that's me... Donald Trump, today junior groundskeeper, tomorrow... Well probably tomorrow I'lll be cold and wet and annoyed and trying to do my accounting flash cards in the rain...
Self improvement is a lot of BS...


  1. I've got two associate degrees, but all they ever really taught me was how to turn on the computer. One was called "Computer Information Technology" and the other one was called "Higher Accounting Management." It SHOULD have been called "Introduction To Accounting." Neither helped me get a job. I'm now a big believer in trade schools.

  2. Being almost 50 years since I escaped the halls of learning, I can hardly remember if I got my full grade 12. I too hate accounting and the most important degrees to me are the ones missing on the thermometer this morning.

  3. One could hire a lot of future accounting help for $5235.00. A course in Quicken would be cheaper & more useful. If you don't make a lot of money, there is no accounting for it. Conversely, if you make a lot, just hire a bookkeeper. Doubtful that Herr Trump does his own bookkeeping.

  4. Suppose instead of teaching: the materiality of the transaction exceeds the missing capital... they taught:If a farmer drove 100 miles to purchase a good used MM G-955, would learning it did not have a battery change the farmers mind? If you get through this awake maybe you could start a real accounting for farmers class.


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