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Thursday, February 12, 2015

I hate going to the dentist and I hate finding a new dentist most of all

There are a couple things in life that freak me out. Rotting dead animals in the front yard, heights, and going to the dentist.
The Rotting Animal thing can be solved with a good respirator which has dual stage filters. I have one. I have to climb haystacks everyday and so I have learned to deal with it, sort of...
But the dentist thing is in a league of its own...

It was not that Dr. Utter was such a bad guy. He wore a traditional dentist uniform with the little collar and a reflector on his head. The receptionist was very nice. It was not traumatic. But I don't like dentists.
I have had a wonderful dentist for years. She never stuck her finger down my throat and choked me. She had great topics for conversation. She did interesting things so I could listen to her and not talk myself. She did a very good job. She was not horrifically expensive.
But all things must end...
She quit..
Too much paper work and I think she felt the need to travel or adventure or something.
She seems to have sold her practice to one of those modern sincere gee-whiz sorts of guys who has a website and a facebook page and doesn't take the Oregon Health plan.
Which doesn't pay for a new cap anyway.
I wonder how much nitrus costs?
MuddyValley used to do stained glass. I wonder if we both took a lot of painkillers if he could fix my tooth.
Perhaps if I ignore it the nerve will die and someday I will get a job with dental insurance.
I wonder if Dr. W is doing a dentistry clinic in Africa or Panama City (Panama not Florida) and I could wait in line in the sweltering tropic heat, risking aids and Ebola and malaria, and get my tooth fixed...
WHY DID I EAT THAT HANDFULL OF CORN NUTS?
(I bet they were GMO and Monsanto purposefully ruined my tooth!)


7 comments:

  1. Classic movie and I sometimes quote that line to an old friend. I won't say I feel your pain but I sure identify with aversion to dentists. I've learned to not bite hard things. Tough granola bars or cookies get soaked in coffee just to be safe. I know my teeth are a ticking time bomb and one of these days it will catch up with me. Good luck with yours.

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  2. These days, I try to find doctors and such younger than I, so they won't up and retire before I croak.

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    1. That gets easier to do as time goes by Gorges.:-)

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    2. this is the best thing i've heard all day.

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  3. So with the Oregon health plan you can get a temporary crown for free but you have to pay for the real one. Brilliant!

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  4. we are entirely BEHIND you... um.. i gotta go to the dentist too. so lemme know... once you clear the way i'll go to the guy here. he seems ok. but i liked my dentist back there on the west side.

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